Lost Fanmix - Claire Season 4
Many thanks to thirtysec0nds and blackcatinbree for recommending some of the songs on this list. This fanmix would not exist without your help!
PS. Due to my slow and crappy internet connection, I have not uploaded any of the songs because it would have taken me five years to do so. If there is a particular song on here that you can’t find through your own forays into the realms of the internet then feel free to ask me to upload it and I will do so as swiftly as humanly possible!
Leave A Note by Missy Higgins
Angry and upset when she finds out what he’s done, Claire sings to Charlie. This song also has a great sadness in that we KNOW that Charlie actually did write her a note but it’s pretty much a certainty that it was destroyed when Desmond jumped into the ocean to avoid Mikhail.
Time blows softly all around us
But we don’t feel it now
You made much more than a hole in the sky, boy
You made us hollow on the inside
So next time, when you’re leaving
Could you at least leave a note?
Next time, when you’re leaving
Could you tell us before you go?
Never Alone by Barlow Girl
Denial. Charlie’s presence is still so strong that she doesn’t believe that he’s gone.
I waited for you today
But you didn’t show oh no
I needed you today
So where did you go?
You told me to call
Said you’d be there
And though I haven’t seen you
Are you still there?
I cried out with no repliant
I can’t feel you by my side so
I hold tight to what I know
You’re here and I’m never alone…
Only When I Sleep by The Corrs
Still in denial (at least in her subconscious), Claire dreams about Charlie and then wakes to find that he isn’t there.
I only hear you breathe
Somewhere in my sleep
Got me spinning round and round
Turning upside-down
But its only when I sleep
And when I wake from slumber
Your shadows disappear
Your breath is just a sea mist
Surrounding my body
I'm working through the daytime
But when it's time to rest
I'm lying in my bed
Listening to my breath
Falling from the edge…
When You’re Gone by Avril Lavigne
Claire begins to realise that he’s really gone.
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok…
I miss you
Lost Without You by Delta Goodrem
She begins to realise just how alone she is without Charlie beside her
All I know is I'm lost without you
I'm not gonna lie
How am I gonna be strong without you?
I need you by my side
If we ever say we'd never be together
In the end you’d wave goodbye
Dunno what I'd do
I’m lost without you
End of the World by Skeeter Davis
And is amazed at how empty the world feels without him.
I wake up in the morning and I wonder
Why everything’s the same as it was
I can’t understand, no I can’t understand
How life goes on the way it does
Why does my heart go on beating?
Why do these eyes of mine cry?
Don’t they know it’s the end of the world?
It ended when you said goodbye
Hold On by Sarah McLachlan
And so begins the stage of bargaining and the lead up to the breakdown that inevitably comes after it…
Oh God if you’re out there won’t you hear me
I know that we’ve never talked before
Oh God the man I love is leaving
Won’t you take him when he comes to your door?
[…]
Hold on
Hold on to yourself
For this is gonna hurt like hell
My Lovers Gone by Dido
The sudden, bleak realisation that Charlie is gone forever.
My lover's gone
I know that kiss will be my last
No more his song
The tune upon his lips has passed
I sing alone
While I watch the ocean
My lover's gone
No earthly ships will ever bring him home again
What Hurts The Most by Rascal Flatts
Claire finally realises that the reason she’s been so upset over Charlie’s death is because she was falling in love with him.
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
By Your Side by Allison Crowe
Once it was Charlie who was the clingy one - now Claire doesn’t know how to let go.
I don't know how
To let go of you
I miss you, I love you
And it colours me
Indefinitely
I am by your side
I am by your side
Like You by Evanescence
At the depth of her despair Claire longs to join him again. Very creepy and unsettling.
I hate me
For breathing without you
I don't want to feel anymore for you
Grieving for you
I'm not grieving for you
Nothing real love can't undo
And though I may have lost my way
All paths lead straight to you
[…]
I believe our love can see us through in death
[…]
I long to be like you
Lie cold in the ground like you
There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you
I'm coming for you
You're not alone
No matter what they told you you're not alone
I'll be right beside you forevermore
Good Day by The Dresden Dolls
Claire gets angry at Charlie for leaving her behind (to the point where she basically says that she’d have been better off without him)
I picked up the pieces of my broken ego
I have finally made my peace as far as you and me go
But I’d love to have you up to see the place
I’d like to do more than survive I’d like to rub it in your face...
Hey! It’s been a lovely day! Everything’s been going my way
I had so much fun today and I’m on fire
God it’s been a lovely day everything’s been going my way
Ever since you went away hey I’m on fire!
Here With Me by Michelle Branch
Claire begins to understand why Charlie did what he did and she finally begins to accept his decision with good grace.
I never will forget that look upon
Your face
How you turned away and left
Without a trace
But I understand that you did what you had to do
And I thank you
I know you had to go away
I died just a little, and I feel it now
You're the one I need
I believe that I would cry just a little
Just to have you back now
Here with me
Absence of Fear by Jewel
Despite her acceptance of what has happened, Claire still misses him.
Inside my skin there is this space
It twists and turns
It bleeds and aches
Inside my heart there's an empty room
It's waiting for lightning
It's waiting for you
And I am wanting
And I am needing you here
Inside the absence of fear…
Remember Me This Way by Jordan Hill
But there is a small ray of hope in the thought that Charlie will always be with her…
Every now and then
We find a special friend
Who never lets us down
Who understands it all
Reaches out each time you fall
You're the best friend that I've found
I know you can't stay
A part of you will never ever go away
Your heart will stay…
To You I Belong by B*Witched
…and in the knowledge that her heart always belonged to Charlie as his did to her.
Rain fell down
You were there
I cried for you
And I hung my head
Storm a-rushing in
Wind was howling
I called for you
You were there
[…]
Beside the sea
Where the waves broke
I drew a heart for you
In the sand
In fields where streams
Turn to rivers
I ran to you
You were there
[…]
Whenever dark turns to night
And all the dreams sing their song
In the daylight forever
To you I belong…
Thank You For Hearing Me by Sinead O’Connor
Claire thanks Charlie for everything he ever did for her.
Thank you for hearing me
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for seeing me
And for not leaving me
Thank you for staying with me
Thank you for not hurting me
You are gentle with me
Thanks for silence with me
Thank you for holding me
And saying I could be
Thank you for saying baby
Thank you for holding me
Thank you for helping me
Thank you for breaking my heart
Thank you for tearing me apart
Now I've a strong strong heart
Thank you for breaking my heart
The Sound of White by Missy Higgins
Just…perfect. A beautiful picture of Claire’s ongoing grief and the way she remembers Charlie.
My silence solidifies
Until that hollow void erases you
Erases you so I can't feel at all
But if I never feel again, at least that nothingness
Will end the painful dream, of you and me
If things get real for me down here
Promise to take me to before you went away
If only for a day
If things get real for me down here
Promise to take me back to the tune
We played before you went away
[…]
I knelt before some strangers face
I'd never have the courage or belief to trust this place
But I dropped my head, cause it felt like lead
And I'm sure I felt your fingers through my hair...
And if I listen to, the sound of white
Sometimes I hear your smile, and breath your light
Yeah if I listen to, the sound of white…