Fic: Toodles
Fandom: Gilmore Girls
Summary: A Saturday morning hostage situation from finish to start.
A\N: Surrender is best.
I.
He hears it coming like a distant train.
Mariano. In the library, with a paper clip scraping gently across his exposed forearm. The skies are clear, but the forecast calls for clouds, high winds, and low temperatures with a light sprinkling of post-apocalyptic bat shit insane.
Seven am Saturday morning and she has yet to stop talking about the Incans or the Nazis or whatever even though its been two hours and he's pretty sure half his brain cells have committed suicide on the promise of an afterlife filled with virgins.
His fun is dead. ("You and me alone in the Modern Classics, are we in one of you're fantasies Gilmore?") Typical initial banter leading him to believe the appointment is more of a "Rory and Jess's Excellent Adventure scenario where they scour Mayberry for decent literature and convince Kirk to remain indoors because of a deadly airborne narcotic" is an eloquent little sham. It's actually more of a "Let's have coffee and confront your issues with algebra" kind of thing.
Whatever small feelings of semi-elation generated by the five am phone call requesting his presence with three large coffees in the library parking lot (annoyed because of the time, amused that five am Rory still has the fortitude to put her hand over the receiver and disguise her voice like some kid Deep Throat, impressed by the decidedly un-Gilmore-ish way she leaves the house without even posting a note on the fridge) is set in the scope of a sniper rifle when she lures him to the second floor reading room and closes the door.
By the time he sees the antiquated copy of Math is Magic! It's already too late.