When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the earth...
Well, it's my birthday...again...I'm 26 as of 9:something. Yay me.(sarcasm)
Anyway, it's like 6:30 in the AM. I like being awake this early in the day, but I prefer to be up when I've slept. I screwed up my sleeping scedule a few days ago because McEvely let me borrow the 1st season of the show Heroes, which has become my new favorite TV show. Other than Dexter of course. I don't think I'll ever find a show as good as Dexter. I don't even think there is a cartoon I like as much as Dexter...well...I might like Space Ghost Coast to Coast a little bit more. Anyways, back to what I was saying. it's 6:30ish in the morning and I'm still awake. There's nothing good on TV right now, (Camp Lazlo comes on at 8, and Tom & Jerry comes on at noon) so I'm watching one of my favorite zombie flicks, (I still say favorite even tho i don't remember 99% of it) Cemetary Man, starring Rupert Everett and Francois Hadji-Lazaro. I haven't seen this movie in years because I can't find it on DVD anywhere, only on VHS. Luckily I found it on Video on Demand. I forgot how incredibly f'd up this movie is, no wonder I loved it so much all those years ago. It's at one of the funniest parts, Everett meets this girl, they fall in love, the only problem is that she is terrified of "man-bits", so he has a procedure to take care of his bits just to find out that while he was healing she got raped, curing her of her wiener phobia. So then she decides to not marry him since he can no longer use his bits...yeah, so it don't sound much like a zombie movie, but I promise you, it most definately is. LoL
Speaking of zombies, my dreams are getting worse...
I remember back around 4th or 5th grade. I couldn't sleep one night. (I've had insomnia for as long as I can remember. I remember back when mom and dad were still together getting up at like 3am to watch Alfred Hitchock Presents, Addams Family, and Dick Van Dyke on Nick at Night every single night.) I went into the living room for my normal "middle of the night snack and TV time" making sure to stay quiet and not wake up mom, and when I turned the TV on something grabbed my attention before I could change to my usual Nick at Night line-up. (by that year it was I Love Lucy, Mr. Ed, and The Munsters) It was something I had never seen before on USA channel, my very first zombie experience. The movie playing was Return of the Living Dead (still to this day my all time favorite zombie flick, I have it memorised now-a-days) I started it in the middle, it was the part where they had cought the sliced in half decomposed zombie girl and had her strapped to the table. I watched in complete horror as they talked to the thing. I never forgot that conversation, it changed my life forever.
Ernie: "Why do you eat people?"
Zombie girl: "Not people, brains."
Ernie: "Why?"
Zombie girl: "The PAIN!"
Ernie: 'What pain?"
Zombie girl: "The pain of being DEAD! I can feel myself rotting!"
Ernie: "Eating brains, how does that make you feel?"
Zombie girl: "It makes the pain go away!"
I couldn't take my eyes off the screen. It was the scariest f**king thing I'd ever seen in my life. (and by then I had already seen all the Freddy Kruger movies and all of the Friday the 13th movies...none of which ever scared me except for the 1st Freddy, but that didn't scare me half this bad) So needless to say, I finished the rest of the movie, without blinking if I recall corectly. Lol. I was completely terrified. I had never been so scared in my life. But as scared as I was, I knew it was just a movie, a horrific movie that I never wanted to ever see again, but just a movie. A couple days later, I got up again, like usual, and they were playing the movie on USA again. (I never understood why they have always insisted on playing the same stuff over and over on TV) But this time I cought the movie from the beginning. I had been watching Duckman and it came on right after. If you've ever seen the original cut of this movie from the beginning, you'll notice that before anything happens, it says. "Based on true events." or "Based on a true story." (one of the 2, I forget how they word it.) And when I read that my brain started racing. I couldn't believe something this horrific could have ever really happened in really real life. So, I watched the entire movie from start to finish that night for the first time ever. (I think I've seen it around 167 times by now) I was even more scared this time, mainly because of the "true story" thing. Thus began my obbsession/fear/paranoia/zombie-phobia/whatever you want to call it. So over the next few years I watched every single zombie movie I could get my hands on so I could learn and prepare for that dreaded day when I'll have to protect myself and siblings from the impending zombie apocalypse. I just knew that zombies were going to come eat mine, Matthews, and Annas brains in the middle of the night. I was so scared that I wouldn't be prepared enough. I did NOT want to become one of the undead. Over the years my obsession just got worse and worse until the point where I actually started liking them. Rather than fearing my impending doom, I started looking forward to it. Going so far as to pray to God not to let me die until after the zombies attacked. Also, ever since the night I watched the movie, still to this day, I have had no less than 1 dream about zombies every week. Some good, some bad, some scary, some awesome, some terrifying, and some downright f'n weird. The weirdest thing is, even after all these years, I've never had the same zombie dream twice. They are always brand new. If I could put my dreams onto film, I could make a television series that would last longer than The Simpsons even. (The Simpsons being the longest lasting sitcom and animated series in the history of TV)
But here lately my zombie dreams have gone from fun-scary, back to completely terrifying-scary. I don't know why. I had one the other day that mixed my phobia of zombies and slugs together. Sort of like the movie Slither, but completely different...and that was the scariest dream I've had since the hand-melting dream from 1st grade. (which started my hand-washing OCD thing, but that's a different story all together.) Like, usually I can't always save everybody, but I usually save the people that mean the most to me. But here lately, in the last month or 2, everybody has been dying. I haven't had a dream where EVERYBODY dies since way back when this all started to become fun for me. Then, sometimes I even die. The other night I even got to watch a crew of zombies rip and pull my guts right out of my stomach, while I just layed there helpless.
You see, I've always enjoyed nightmares, I've always had night terrors for as long as I can remember. I don't remember a time where I didn't have nightmares almost every single night. I'm sure I probably had nightmares every night even as a toddler. But the thing is, I've always enjoyed them. I love waking up in complete terror either screaming or too scared to scream, heart pounding, beads of sweat running down my face, grabbing for whatever I can grab to make me feel safe again. I love the adrenaline rush. I always have. But here lately, my dreams have been getting seriously f'n scary. I wonder if it's a sign. If the zombies are getting ready to come. They say, "When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the earth." and looking at the world here the last few years, Hell has got to be getting pretty full by now. I'm not real worried about it, as long as the zombies don't show up until I move back to NC. I have a million different plans and back-up plans for any kind of zombie emergency. I know exactly what I'll do, and where I'll go, etc. In fact, when I first moved out here to Tennessee, that was the VERY FIRST thing I thought about. I made a plan and several back-up plans for TN. The only problem I have is Caitlyn. I don't like her being so far away. Out of all the possible things that could happen to her, nothing scares me more than the zombie apocalypse coming while I'm 6 hours away from her. I don't think I'll be able to make it to her in time. I know Heather and her mother wont last very long when the zombies come, and they are Caitlyns only protection. Which pretty much means she is screwed.
I could write a whole book on zombies. Maybe I should. I could make some money off it. There are these two books I've been wanting to read. 'The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead' and 'World War Z'. Both written by Max Brooks.
Actually, those two books would be the PERFECT birthday gift for me. hint hint wink wink. Lol
Well, that was long and pointless. See what happens when you get me babbling with no sleep and too many thoughts of death and the undead...lol. I guess for those of you who didn't know the origin of my zombie obbsession, now you do! Don't you feel special?
Anyways, it's my birthday. 26 short years ago I was a whiny little shit machine...not much has changed.
I was thinking/talking to myself the other day (I do that a lot lately, I don't have anything better to do than sit here and stare at the TV, or occasionally work out when I'm not feeling lazy.) I usually think about zombies or cartoons, but this time I was thinking about my life up til now, and I realized that I've been smoking for 13 years, exactly half my life. All because I thought it was cool back in middle school...I was pretty stupid back then...well, stupider.
And I've decided to quit...for real this time...I'm doing pretty good so far. I'm down to the point where I only have to smoke still after I eat a meal. The only problem is, the less I smoke, the more I want to eat, and the more I eat, the more I smoke. It's a vicious circle. But I smoked Annas last cigarette last night, and she went to work at 5, so now I am forced to go without all day. Hopefully that will help, and not cause me to strangle the child in a violent fit of addicted fiending rage, having me sent to prison for the rest of my life. That would be no good, no good at all...
Anyways, I've grown tired of typing and have become very hungry...is it weird that I get hungry talking about flesh eating zombies? eh, I'm gonna go make me a couple waffles...and pretend they're brains. Lol...just kidding, I'm not THAT obbsessed........yet.......
Anyway, it's like 6:30 in the AM. I like being awake this early in the day, but I prefer to be up when I've slept. I screwed up my sleeping scedule a few days ago because McEvely let me borrow the 1st season of the show Heroes, which has become my new favorite TV show. Other than Dexter of course. I don't think I'll ever find a show as good as Dexter. I don't even think there is a cartoon I like as much as Dexter...well...I might like Space Ghost Coast to Coast a little bit more. Anyways, back to what I was saying. it's 6:30ish in the morning and I'm still awake. There's nothing good on TV right now, (Camp Lazlo comes on at 8, and Tom & Jerry comes on at noon) so I'm watching one of my favorite zombie flicks, (I still say favorite even tho i don't remember 99% of it) Cemetary Man, starring Rupert Everett and Francois Hadji-Lazaro. I haven't seen this movie in years because I can't find it on DVD anywhere, only on VHS. Luckily I found it on Video on Demand. I forgot how incredibly f'd up this movie is, no wonder I loved it so much all those years ago. It's at one of the funniest parts, Everett meets this girl, they fall in love, the only problem is that she is terrified of "man-bits", so he has a procedure to take care of his bits just to find out that while he was healing she got raped, curing her of her wiener phobia. So then she decides to not marry him since he can no longer use his bits...yeah, so it don't sound much like a zombie movie, but I promise you, it most definately is. LoL
Speaking of zombies, my dreams are getting worse...
I remember back around 4th or 5th grade. I couldn't sleep one night. (I've had insomnia for as long as I can remember. I remember back when mom and dad were still together getting up at like 3am to watch Alfred Hitchock Presents, Addams Family, and Dick Van Dyke on Nick at Night every single night.) I went into the living room for my normal "middle of the night snack and TV time" making sure to stay quiet and not wake up mom, and when I turned the TV on something grabbed my attention before I could change to my usual Nick at Night line-up. (by that year it was I Love Lucy, Mr. Ed, and The Munsters) It was something I had never seen before on USA channel, my very first zombie experience. The movie playing was Return of the Living Dead (still to this day my all time favorite zombie flick, I have it memorised now-a-days) I started it in the middle, it was the part where they had cought the sliced in half decomposed zombie girl and had her strapped to the table. I watched in complete horror as they talked to the thing. I never forgot that conversation, it changed my life forever.
Ernie: "Why do you eat people?"
Zombie girl: "Not people, brains."
Ernie: "Why?"
Zombie girl: "The PAIN!"
Ernie: 'What pain?"
Zombie girl: "The pain of being DEAD! I can feel myself rotting!"
Ernie: "Eating brains, how does that make you feel?"
Zombie girl: "It makes the pain go away!"
I couldn't take my eyes off the screen. It was the scariest f**king thing I'd ever seen in my life. (and by then I had already seen all the Freddy Kruger movies and all of the Friday the 13th movies...none of which ever scared me except for the 1st Freddy, but that didn't scare me half this bad) So needless to say, I finished the rest of the movie, without blinking if I recall corectly. Lol. I was completely terrified. I had never been so scared in my life. But as scared as I was, I knew it was just a movie, a horrific movie that I never wanted to ever see again, but just a movie. A couple days later, I got up again, like usual, and they were playing the movie on USA again. (I never understood why they have always insisted on playing the same stuff over and over on TV) But this time I cought the movie from the beginning. I had been watching Duckman and it came on right after. If you've ever seen the original cut of this movie from the beginning, you'll notice that before anything happens, it says. "Based on true events." or "Based on a true story." (one of the 2, I forget how they word it.) And when I read that my brain started racing. I couldn't believe something this horrific could have ever really happened in really real life. So, I watched the entire movie from start to finish that night for the first time ever. (I think I've seen it around 167 times by now) I was even more scared this time, mainly because of the "true story" thing. Thus began my obbsession/fear/paranoia/zombie-phobia/whatever you want to call it. So over the next few years I watched every single zombie movie I could get my hands on so I could learn and prepare for that dreaded day when I'll have to protect myself and siblings from the impending zombie apocalypse. I just knew that zombies were going to come eat mine, Matthews, and Annas brains in the middle of the night. I was so scared that I wouldn't be prepared enough. I did NOT want to become one of the undead. Over the years my obsession just got worse and worse until the point where I actually started liking them. Rather than fearing my impending doom, I started looking forward to it. Going so far as to pray to God not to let me die until after the zombies attacked. Also, ever since the night I watched the movie, still to this day, I have had no less than 1 dream about zombies every week. Some good, some bad, some scary, some awesome, some terrifying, and some downright f'n weird. The weirdest thing is, even after all these years, I've never had the same zombie dream twice. They are always brand new. If I could put my dreams onto film, I could make a television series that would last longer than The Simpsons even. (The Simpsons being the longest lasting sitcom and animated series in the history of TV)
But here lately my zombie dreams have gone from fun-scary, back to completely terrifying-scary. I don't know why. I had one the other day that mixed my phobia of zombies and slugs together. Sort of like the movie Slither, but completely different...and that was the scariest dream I've had since the hand-melting dream from 1st grade. (which started my hand-washing OCD thing, but that's a different story all together.) Like, usually I can't always save everybody, but I usually save the people that mean the most to me. But here lately, in the last month or 2, everybody has been dying. I haven't had a dream where EVERYBODY dies since way back when this all started to become fun for me. Then, sometimes I even die. The other night I even got to watch a crew of zombies rip and pull my guts right out of my stomach, while I just layed there helpless.
You see, I've always enjoyed nightmares, I've always had night terrors for as long as I can remember. I don't remember a time where I didn't have nightmares almost every single night. I'm sure I probably had nightmares every night even as a toddler. But the thing is, I've always enjoyed them. I love waking up in complete terror either screaming or too scared to scream, heart pounding, beads of sweat running down my face, grabbing for whatever I can grab to make me feel safe again. I love the adrenaline rush. I always have. But here lately, my dreams have been getting seriously f'n scary. I wonder if it's a sign. If the zombies are getting ready to come. They say, "When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the earth." and looking at the world here the last few years, Hell has got to be getting pretty full by now. I'm not real worried about it, as long as the zombies don't show up until I move back to NC. I have a million different plans and back-up plans for any kind of zombie emergency. I know exactly what I'll do, and where I'll go, etc. In fact, when I first moved out here to Tennessee, that was the VERY FIRST thing I thought about. I made a plan and several back-up plans for TN. The only problem I have is Caitlyn. I don't like her being so far away. Out of all the possible things that could happen to her, nothing scares me more than the zombie apocalypse coming while I'm 6 hours away from her. I don't think I'll be able to make it to her in time. I know Heather and her mother wont last very long when the zombies come, and they are Caitlyns only protection. Which pretty much means she is screwed.
I could write a whole book on zombies. Maybe I should. I could make some money off it. There are these two books I've been wanting to read. 'The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead' and 'World War Z'. Both written by Max Brooks.
Actually, those two books would be the PERFECT birthday gift for me. hint hint wink wink. Lol
Well, that was long and pointless. See what happens when you get me babbling with no sleep and too many thoughts of death and the undead...lol. I guess for those of you who didn't know the origin of my zombie obbsession, now you do! Don't you feel special?
Anyways, it's my birthday. 26 short years ago I was a whiny little shit machine...not much has changed.
I was thinking/talking to myself the other day (I do that a lot lately, I don't have anything better to do than sit here and stare at the TV, or occasionally work out when I'm not feeling lazy.) I usually think about zombies or cartoons, but this time I was thinking about my life up til now, and I realized that I've been smoking for 13 years, exactly half my life. All because I thought it was cool back in middle school...I was pretty stupid back then...well, stupider.
And I've decided to quit...for real this time...I'm doing pretty good so far. I'm down to the point where I only have to smoke still after I eat a meal. The only problem is, the less I smoke, the more I want to eat, and the more I eat, the more I smoke. It's a vicious circle. But I smoked Annas last cigarette last night, and she went to work at 5, so now I am forced to go without all day. Hopefully that will help, and not cause me to strangle the child in a violent fit of addicted fiending rage, having me sent to prison for the rest of my life. That would be no good, no good at all...
Anyways, I've grown tired of typing and have become very hungry...is it weird that I get hungry talking about flesh eating zombies? eh, I'm gonna go make me a couple waffles...and pretend they're brains. Lol...just kidding, I'm not THAT obbsessed........yet.......