Lt. Charlene Masters, Personal Log; Stardate 2258.94
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The engines are humming again. It’s strange how calm it makes me. How I feel more focused and...I think content is the right word. All the shit that wants to keep following me around, the planetside shit, is slowing fading away. By the time we’re up again, it’s all be gone. And I’ll feel like me again.
And God, the excitement. It’s building up in me, this wonderful pressure in my chest, like my heart is expanding. Ever since I first got posted to the Valiant, almost four years ago, space has been home. Being planetside is like being on vacation- its nice for the first few days, but then you just want to get the hell home.
It’s not just me either. The other crewmen and women running around here - - checking gauges, adjusting instruments, running diagnostics, doing whatever - - they feel it too. I can see it in their faces. It’s contagious and wonderful and I haven’t smiled this much in a long time.
Have yet to run into Mr. Scott, but as long as he’s mucking around in someone else’s department, he’s not mucking around in mine. Which is great, since I’m trying to get things looking in order so I don’t look incompetent when Commander Spock comes for a visit. I’m still a little frightened that someone is going to deem me incompetent and take away my title, my rank and I’ll be stuck polishing turbines for the rest of my life.
But the engines are humming again. Let’s do this thing.
Security Access: Private
Didn't send a letter to Bobby. Spoke to Dad briefly. He wished luck. Mom complained about me not talking to Darren and Reese. I told her to fuck off and mind her own business. I probably should have left things a little better. I wonder when all this shit will stop hurting. At least up in space it doesn't matter.
The engines are humming again. It’s strange how calm it makes me. How I feel more focused and...I think content is the right word. All the shit that wants to keep following me around, the planetside shit, is slowing fading away. By the time we’re up again, it’s all be gone. And I’ll feel like me again.
And God, the excitement. It’s building up in me, this wonderful pressure in my chest, like my heart is expanding. Ever since I first got posted to the Valiant, almost four years ago, space has been home. Being planetside is like being on vacation- its nice for the first few days, but then you just want to get the hell home.
It’s not just me either. The other crewmen and women running around here - - checking gauges, adjusting instruments, running diagnostics, doing whatever - - they feel it too. I can see it in their faces. It’s contagious and wonderful and I haven’t smiled this much in a long time.
Have yet to run into Mr. Scott, but as long as he’s mucking around in someone else’s department, he’s not mucking around in mine. Which is great, since I’m trying to get things looking in order so I don’t look incompetent when Commander Spock comes for a visit. I’m still a little frightened that someone is going to deem me incompetent and take away my title, my rank and I’ll be stuck polishing turbines for the rest of my life.
But the engines are humming again. Let’s do this thing.
Security Access: Private
Didn't send a letter to Bobby. Spoke to Dad briefly. He wished luck. Mom complained about me not talking to Darren and Reese. I told her to fuck off and mind her own business. I probably should have left things a little better. I wonder when all this shit will stop hurting. At least up in space it doesn't matter.