Saturday alone
I decided last night that I shall just be alone today. Usually, I'll try to find a friend to hang out with when Jon's on night shift but today, I really want to be alone. Almost feel like saying - I really don't like humans for now.
And I am glad I made that decision to be alone for the evening.
I was really determined to enjoy myself and not to (1) think about work (2) think about the irritating things people did/ say to me the last one week (3) just F*** care about the burden of the world and BE ALONE, doing the things I want to do.
Evening to myself
Jon and I spent the day time SLEEPING, watching Grey Anatomy and doing NOTHING. We left house at about 6pm - he to work and me to gym at Suntec. Met Izz at the gym and stayed for about an hour, it was good workout and I felt good.
Rushed down to Kinokuniya (20% storewide discount for members!!), how can i resist that? Bought 3 books, one that Jon wanted and the other two just random picks for myself.
Then I slowly strolled to Cineleisure, bought myself dinner and a movie - NEXT (the one with Nicholas Cage and Jessica Biel). Before the show (11.35pm), I sat at the Coke lounge all by myself, reading my book and having a big Coke.
It may seems like me doing nothing much the whole time but the fact is, I am alone! I used to be alone alot and that's good. I forgot how nice it is to be alone sometimes. I am very happy today. I have new books, I watched a rather decent movie and I burned some fats and calories.
The past week...
The past week had been a pain. Although I thank God that I went through it with strength but it was ANNOYING ANNOYING ANNOYING. I wonder how some times humans can be so painful to be around with and that constant strength and patience have to be drawn from God to manage humans. I am quite sure I can be one of those painful humans at times and I asked God today, why on earth do you love us so much when we are selfish and really mean most of the times?
It reminded me more now that Jesus' death at the cross was indeed out of GREAT LOVE for us, something that nobody else can do. It's so hard to continue loving people when they are very very annoying, let alone die for them...
I read Joyce's book about approval addiction. Sometimes, I think I suffer from that. I try my best to make sure everyone around me is taken care of, is happy and approves of what I say/ do etc etc etc but I realised, it's so wrong. You really can't please everyone. People will never be contented. You give them one thing, they want twenty more and if you give them 19, it's not good enough. It's never good enough. So, I shall learn to seek only God's approval and with that, I know blessings will come.
I learn to appreciate my boss too. I learn to pray for her too and I am glad about it. All I really want is to do my work extremely well (with God's wisdom and strength) and be blessed with good co-workers and to be a blessing to people around me and go home and READ MY BOOKS.
Anyway, Jon has been praying for me and we will continue to pray everyday that (1) i have lots of wisdom to handle people and situations (2) I have strength (3) I learn not to complain or be a bad influence to people around me (4) manage my time wisely.
I am very sure with God, I will be victorious regardless of situations. I just have to now learn not to let annoying things bother me and remember Psalms 91:7
"A thousand may fall dead beside you, ten thousand all around you, but you will not be harmed.
And I am glad I made that decision to be alone for the evening.
I was really determined to enjoy myself and not to (1) think about work (2) think about the irritating things people did/ say to me the last one week (3) just F*** care about the burden of the world and BE ALONE, doing the things I want to do.
Evening to myself
Jon and I spent the day time SLEEPING, watching Grey Anatomy and doing NOTHING. We left house at about 6pm - he to work and me to gym at Suntec. Met Izz at the gym and stayed for about an hour, it was good workout and I felt good.
Rushed down to Kinokuniya (20% storewide discount for members!!), how can i resist that? Bought 3 books, one that Jon wanted and the other two just random picks for myself.
Then I slowly strolled to Cineleisure, bought myself dinner and a movie - NEXT (the one with Nicholas Cage and Jessica Biel). Before the show (11.35pm), I sat at the Coke lounge all by myself, reading my book and having a big Coke.
It may seems like me doing nothing much the whole time but the fact is, I am alone! I used to be alone alot and that's good. I forgot how nice it is to be alone sometimes. I am very happy today. I have new books, I watched a rather decent movie and I burned some fats and calories.
The past week...
The past week had been a pain. Although I thank God that I went through it with strength but it was ANNOYING ANNOYING ANNOYING. I wonder how some times humans can be so painful to be around with and that constant strength and patience have to be drawn from God to manage humans. I am quite sure I can be one of those painful humans at times and I asked God today, why on earth do you love us so much when we are selfish and really mean most of the times?
It reminded me more now that Jesus' death at the cross was indeed out of GREAT LOVE for us, something that nobody else can do. It's so hard to continue loving people when they are very very annoying, let alone die for them...
I read Joyce's book about approval addiction. Sometimes, I think I suffer from that. I try my best to make sure everyone around me is taken care of, is happy and approves of what I say/ do etc etc etc but I realised, it's so wrong. You really can't please everyone. People will never be contented. You give them one thing, they want twenty more and if you give them 19, it's not good enough. It's never good enough. So, I shall learn to seek only God's approval and with that, I know blessings will come.
I learn to appreciate my boss too. I learn to pray for her too and I am glad about it. All I really want is to do my work extremely well (with God's wisdom and strength) and be blessed with good co-workers and to be a blessing to people around me and go home and READ MY BOOKS.
Anyway, Jon has been praying for me and we will continue to pray everyday that (1) i have lots of wisdom to handle people and situations (2) I have strength (3) I learn not to complain or be a bad influence to people around me (4) manage my time wisely.
I am very sure with God, I will be victorious regardless of situations. I just have to now learn not to let annoying things bother me and remember Psalms 91:7
"A thousand may fall dead beside you, ten thousand all around you, but you will not be harmed.