Sticky spot
1st spot: Apartment
My friend Kate needs a room mate.
Kate was one of the choices of people that I wanted to live with.
For the past month or so, I have told Kate that I would live with her.
We found a cute townhouse downtown for an excellent price. (Need to look no more)
However....
I wasn't planning on moving out so quickly from my parents roof.
The plan is, Kate and I are suppose to move in Mid January. (But before she needed someone I was going to wait till the summer)
My parents want me to stay with them and save money. (Plus they don't think I can afford to live on my own)
I don't really have money saved.
I still haven't gotten my car fixed AND
my school loans are getting ready to make a huge increase in Feb (100 to 250 bucks).
It's scary but I know I can do it. I know that I will only have 200 bucks to spare after paying bills and extra expenses like food- so it will be tight.
BUT I am scared. I do need to save money with the way the economy is.
But if I said no NOW, I would look like a horrible friend. (I mean its been 2 months of me saying, Yeah, let's do it)
If I say yes, I will have my own place, downtown (Near the things I want to be near) and I will feel like I accomplished my adulthood.
Ugh! I am just so scared. I mean I like listening to my parents, but I don't want to let a friend down.
2nd spot: Jason
So.... if you haven't figured it out, it's never ending.
As I posted last time, I went to Jason's show, got mad at him for ignoring me and then leaving with another girl.
This lead to him thinking I still want to be with him.
He constantly begged me to hang out with him. He called me all the time. He told me that he has changed.
I did hang out with him a little bit, but I kept it strictly friends.
It was nice to have a friend. It was almost a little too nice, because I treated him like a boyfriend (almost)
I called him every day (or at least returned his phone calls)
I hung out with him at least once a week.
I think I let him get a little too close.
Last night, he told me he was giving up. He said that he has been trying to make me want to date him again, but
since I constantly tell him I don't feel that way anymore, that he is going to move on and that he thinks that it
might be better to not talk to me. He said that he needs to start seeing other girls because his time is running out.
I didn't say anything. I got off the phone and felt lonely and hopeless.
It's weird because I don't think I can love him like I use to. I wish things were different but I can't change it.
I want something new, but I feel like its never going to happen and I think it really bothers me that
there are always girls that are wanting to be with Jason. He wants(ed) to be with me. Of course I said no, and I have no one.
I am sure that its all the loneliness that is talking, but I am scared to say "okay, start seeing other girls"
My friend Kate needs a room mate.
Kate was one of the choices of people that I wanted to live with.
For the past month or so, I have told Kate that I would live with her.
We found a cute townhouse downtown for an excellent price. (Need to look no more)
However....
I wasn't planning on moving out so quickly from my parents roof.
The plan is, Kate and I are suppose to move in Mid January. (But before she needed someone I was going to wait till the summer)
My parents want me to stay with them and save money. (Plus they don't think I can afford to live on my own)
I don't really have money saved.
I still haven't gotten my car fixed AND
my school loans are getting ready to make a huge increase in Feb (100 to 250 bucks).
It's scary but I know I can do it. I know that I will only have 200 bucks to spare after paying bills and extra expenses like food- so it will be tight.
BUT I am scared. I do need to save money with the way the economy is.
But if I said no NOW, I would look like a horrible friend. (I mean its been 2 months of me saying, Yeah, let's do it)
If I say yes, I will have my own place, downtown (Near the things I want to be near) and I will feel like I accomplished my adulthood.
Ugh! I am just so scared. I mean I like listening to my parents, but I don't want to let a friend down.
2nd spot: Jason
So.... if you haven't figured it out, it's never ending.
As I posted last time, I went to Jason's show, got mad at him for ignoring me and then leaving with another girl.
This lead to him thinking I still want to be with him.
He constantly begged me to hang out with him. He called me all the time. He told me that he has changed.
I did hang out with him a little bit, but I kept it strictly friends.
It was nice to have a friend. It was almost a little too nice, because I treated him like a boyfriend (almost)
I called him every day (or at least returned his phone calls)
I hung out with him at least once a week.
I think I let him get a little too close.
Last night, he told me he was giving up. He said that he has been trying to make me want to date him again, but
since I constantly tell him I don't feel that way anymore, that he is going to move on and that he thinks that it
might be better to not talk to me. He said that he needs to start seeing other girls because his time is running out.
I didn't say anything. I got off the phone and felt lonely and hopeless.
It's weird because I don't think I can love him like I use to. I wish things were different but I can't change it.
I want something new, but I feel like its never going to happen and I think it really bothers me that
there are always girls that are wanting to be with Jason. He wants(ed) to be with me. Of course I said no, and I have no one.
I am sure that its all the loneliness that is talking, but I am scared to say "okay, start seeing other girls"