Observations: A Snow "Man" and a Short Satan
I have a few things to say, and they are obvservations, if you will, of the things in my life.
So I was driving home from a fabulous day on the mountain (and wow! the pow was sick) when I happened to turn my head and notice, to the direct right of my car, two objects of note: a snowman, and a short satan.
Let's concentrate on the snowman first. Here's my question: where does the snowman tradition come from? What small child was like 'Hey, Joey*, let's make a man of snow!' and lil' Joey was like 'Great idea! But instead of making it look like a real person let's make it just three balls of snow!' 'Yah, what a cruel trick! It'll be an awesome worldwide sensation!' It really was a stroke of creative genius, I think. It's some wicked creativity to see snow and automatically think of redesigned human physiology. You'd think after some time we'd come up with something closer to the truth. Or at least rename the snowman. Something like "Snowball-Person-With-Face-Made-Of-Random-Objects-Who-Promotes-The-Use-Of-Pipe-Tobacco".
Second, the satan. I should redefine that statement. He was less of a satan and more of a small child dressed up like a satan weilding an axe. I probably would've stopped to enjoy the full hilarity of the situation had he not been rushing toward my car. A few questions come to mind. Why was he dressed so? A costume party, a video, candid camera? How often does this occur? Every hour on the hour? With the changing of the tide, maybe? I wonder where this child's parents were, or what they thought about the whole situation. I imagine one of the following situations holds true.
1.They have no idea.
Mom: Hey honey, have you seen Joey?
Dad: Nope, but we should keep him away from outside. The crazy nieghbors have their kid dressed up like Satan again. They might try the goat sacrifice again.
2. They don't really care.
Mom: Joey, you need to clean your room today.
Joey: I will, after I finish finding a cure for cancer and running close to the road in a satan mask weilding an axe at all the cars so I can feel connected with people because you fail to give me any attention.
Mom: *doesn't look up from People Magazine* Ok, dinner's at 5:00.
3. They endorse this activity through some strange cultrual tradition.
Mom: *on the phone* Oh, mom, you should see him! You'd be so proud! He just went and found an axe on his own and is just running around outside with all the - oh! oh! He just chased a car screaming... I'm so happy! Where's the video camera...
So that's that. Currently, I'm watching my mom's puppy chasing her tail round and round. She's REALLY happy about it too. I wish I got that excited (in a nonsexual sense) every time I saw my bum.
*All names used in this entry are entirely coincidental and are in no way related to any real people or love life situations.
So I was driving home from a fabulous day on the mountain (and wow! the pow was sick) when I happened to turn my head and notice, to the direct right of my car, two objects of note: a snowman, and a short satan.
Let's concentrate on the snowman first. Here's my question: where does the snowman tradition come from? What small child was like 'Hey, Joey*, let's make a man of snow!' and lil' Joey was like 'Great idea! But instead of making it look like a real person let's make it just three balls of snow!' 'Yah, what a cruel trick! It'll be an awesome worldwide sensation!' It really was a stroke of creative genius, I think. It's some wicked creativity to see snow and automatically think of redesigned human physiology. You'd think after some time we'd come up with something closer to the truth. Or at least rename the snowman. Something like "Snowball-Person-With-Face-Made-Of-Random-Objects-Who-Promotes-The-Use-Of-Pipe-Tobacco".
Second, the satan. I should redefine that statement. He was less of a satan and more of a small child dressed up like a satan weilding an axe. I probably would've stopped to enjoy the full hilarity of the situation had he not been rushing toward my car. A few questions come to mind. Why was he dressed so? A costume party, a video, candid camera? How often does this occur? Every hour on the hour? With the changing of the tide, maybe? I wonder where this child's parents were, or what they thought about the whole situation. I imagine one of the following situations holds true.
1.They have no idea.
Mom: Hey honey, have you seen Joey?
Dad: Nope, but we should keep him away from outside. The crazy nieghbors have their kid dressed up like Satan again. They might try the goat sacrifice again.
2. They don't really care.
Mom: Joey, you need to clean your room today.
Joey: I will, after I finish finding a cure for cancer and running close to the road in a satan mask weilding an axe at all the cars so I can feel connected with people because you fail to give me any attention.
Mom: *doesn't look up from People Magazine* Ok, dinner's at 5:00.
3. They endorse this activity through some strange cultrual tradition.
Mom: *on the phone* Oh, mom, you should see him! You'd be so proud! He just went and found an axe on his own and is just running around outside with all the - oh! oh! He just chased a car screaming... I'm so happy! Where's the video camera...
So that's that. Currently, I'm watching my mom's puppy chasing her tail round and round. She's REALLY happy about it too. I wish I got that excited (in a nonsexual sense) every time I saw my bum.
*All names used in this entry are entirely coincidental and are in no way related to any real people or love life situations.