More England, More English

May 02, 2006 08:37

British English is not really a foreign language compared to American English. It's simply spoken in a manner that defies logic and reason.

The very heart and soul of Her Majesty's empire is seen herewith. Granted, if you locate London on a map, it's more at the colon or appendix level, but we'll discuss that another time. )

pictures, storytime, humor, travel

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r0x May 2 2006, 16:54:21 UTC
You think London's roadways are bad? Try Milton Keynes! Roundabouts and concrete cows, ahoy!

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chaosvizier May 2 2006, 16:58:40 UTC
The roundabouts are indeed a travesty inflicted upon the roadways. They were one of the more challenging aspects of driving on The Other Side of the road.

Concrete cows, on the other hand... that's just rude. Why can't you use ordinary cows? Or does one milk a concrete cow to get cement? Hmmmmm...

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r0x May 2 2006, 17:04:41 UTC
It's such a nightmare. On my way to school in the morning I have to go along the bit of road that has the most roundabouts. 6 roundabouts in 2km!! It's insane.

Haha, I wish the concret cows produced cement milk. At least then they'd be useful...

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chaosvizier May 2 2006, 17:07:56 UTC
Some roundabouts don't even deserve to be called roundabouts. It's just a big white circle painted on the middle of a road. More like a traffic bagel than a major circle. They're not fooling anyone.

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r0x May 2 2006, 17:16:14 UTC
They are a pain in the butt. The turnability of my moped is awful and I end up going up the kerb EVERY SINGLE DAY on the one nearest to my school.

Speaking of roundabouts, the Magic Roundabout is terrifying


... )

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chaosvizier May 2 2006, 17:25:37 UTC
BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA... The bottom picture looks like the result of this conversation:

HITLER: MWAHAHA, my Luftwaffe is here to smack your RAF around!
CHURCHILL: By Jove, he might do it. We must shore up our ground defenses.
CITY PLANNER: I have it, Prime Minister. The pefect counter to their Panzer brigades.
CHURCHILL: Out with it, man! What is it?
CITY PLANNER: I call it... *drumroll* The Super-Roundabout.
CHURCHILL: ...
CITY PLANNER: Look. The Nazis love that Swastika thing. It indicates simple quadratic thinking. But behold- we add an extra arm to the Swastika, adjust the angles accordingly, and then put it on all our roadways. They'll be psychologically devastated!
CHURCHILL: ...
CITY PLANNER: We built an experimental one right up here, sir. We've had a dozen Londoners trapped on it for six days now. It's foolproof!
CHURCHILL: ...so how are our boys in the RAF doing?
RAF: We're doing great, Mr. Prime Minister!
CHURCHILL: OH THANK GOD.

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r0x May 2 2006, 17:30:44 UTC
...You win the internets today sir.

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chaosvizier May 2 2006, 18:05:06 UTC
Always happy to keep visitors entertained. ;-)

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r0x May 2 2006, 18:09:25 UTC
Do you mind horribly if I add you? I've been reading back through your entries and I had to stop drinking because I kept spluttering all over the place.

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chaosvizier May 2 2006, 18:10:06 UTC
Feel free! I love everybody. Except those jerks in Pod Six.

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r0x May 2 2006, 18:12:25 UTC
Hooray.

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What were they thinking? angledge May 2 2006, 17:36:25 UTC
That is the WORST transportation design I've ever seen! What's that in the center? Parking? Is this used for automotive Maypole-dancing?

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Re: What were they thinking? r0x May 2 2006, 17:41:03 UTC
I HAVE NO IDEA.

If I'm in Hemel I avoid that roundabout like the plague. I'd rather take public transport than attempt it. MINI ROUNDABOUTS, BIG ROUNDABOUT, GOING BOTH WAYS. WTF?!

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Re: What were they thinking? chaosvizier May 2 2006, 18:03:21 UTC
That thing is a disaster waiting to happen. Except that it is happening right this moment. Infernal!

I bet if you get enough cars on it going round both ways and coming in and out of each exit it looks like one of those wacky optical illusions that you think is spinning but it's not and then you get a headache and have to drink to cure your brain. In fact, I bet drinking can only help one navigate that thing.

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Re: What were they thinking? r0x May 2 2006, 18:07:09 UTC
It's been around since the late 70's according to Wikipedia. HOW MANY ROUNDABOUTS HAVE THEIR OWN WIKIPEDIA ENTRY?!

It continues to amaze me.

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Re: What were they thinking? chaosvizier May 2 2006, 18:09:28 UTC
I wonder how many roundabouts have their own five-digit casualty count. Because that one? Probably should.

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