Two paths diverged in the woods...
Do you ever have those moments where you see two paths, clearly, and where they will lead?
Not so much of a, "If I do A, B will happen", but more of a taking up space, like, "If I don't do A, then B might happen, leading to C".
Not like, "If I keep seeing this guy, happily ever after will happen," but more like "If I don't see this guy, he'll see this other girl, and X, Y, Z will happen, for them".
I actually have those moments often. I'm not great at seeing my own future (or rather, I see infinite possibilities, of which, none will happen because I'm clearly hoping for too much) but I'm incredible at seeing the possibilities, more likely, realities, of others. Both positive, and negative. But it always involves me, not talking up that space.
Not taking up space to complicate my own life in the future. Not taking up space as to not get in the way of someone else's happiness.
Not on purpose, they just usually can't see it.
I once had an ex ask me to see Wicked. To which I replied, "fuck yes!" And sure, sex was implied, but we were both single, so whatever. A week later he tells me that he started seeing a girl he met online, and she really wants to see Wicked... But I was still invited, and she'd like to meet me. I know, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how that would have played out, right? I declined, because I thought it was best not to sabotage their possible future relationship. They ended up getting married, and had a kid. And I was pretty proud of myself for taking that, or rather, not taking, that path.
I once dated a guy, about 2 or 3 months in, his ex-girlfriend, whom I didn't know much about aside from her having moved away for a graduate program, was in town to "visit a friend". Of course, she wanted to catch up. This time, I was not invited, and their afternoon chat over coffee got pushed back into a drink at a bar. Then a late night, heartfelt conversation in the car. It also didn't take a genius to see where this was going. I broke it off, knowing that the moment I did, they would see each other and fuck, and she'd have a mental hold on him as long as she could manage it. I could have taken up space and prevented it, but that would have sucked for me, too. I saw how it was going to play out, but both paths were crap.
I don't know. I guess it's better to see it coming. (By the way, I was absolutely on point- they are also married, now.)
I pass up opportunities to take up space. Often. Just because I'm not enthusiastic about either outcome. And I wonder what the chances are that I could be wrong. That I'm actually passing up on great opportunities, if I had just stuck with it. Just, see what happens. Don't analyze it. But it's so hard not to, when it seems so clear.
There just doesn't seem to be any incentive. What's the point in doing something if it doesn't make you scream "YES! Let's fucking do that!"
I'll be honest, I wouldn't want to take a path with someone who just didn't have any better options. Someone who's just taking up space.. Because that better path might be closer than you think - but impossible to see with a Snorlax in the way.
Not so much of a, "If I do A, B will happen", but more of a taking up space, like, "If I don't do A, then B might happen, leading to C".
Not like, "If I keep seeing this guy, happily ever after will happen," but more like "If I don't see this guy, he'll see this other girl, and X, Y, Z will happen, for them".
I actually have those moments often. I'm not great at seeing my own future (or rather, I see infinite possibilities, of which, none will happen because I'm clearly hoping for too much) but I'm incredible at seeing the possibilities, more likely, realities, of others. Both positive, and negative. But it always involves me, not talking up that space.
Not taking up space to complicate my own life in the future. Not taking up space as to not get in the way of someone else's happiness.
Not on purpose, they just usually can't see it.
I once had an ex ask me to see Wicked. To which I replied, "fuck yes!" And sure, sex was implied, but we were both single, so whatever. A week later he tells me that he started seeing a girl he met online, and she really wants to see Wicked... But I was still invited, and she'd like to meet me. I know, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how that would have played out, right? I declined, because I thought it was best not to sabotage their possible future relationship. They ended up getting married, and had a kid. And I was pretty proud of myself for taking that, or rather, not taking, that path.
I once dated a guy, about 2 or 3 months in, his ex-girlfriend, whom I didn't know much about aside from her having moved away for a graduate program, was in town to "visit a friend". Of course, she wanted to catch up. This time, I was not invited, and their afternoon chat over coffee got pushed back into a drink at a bar. Then a late night, heartfelt conversation in the car. It also didn't take a genius to see where this was going. I broke it off, knowing that the moment I did, they would see each other and fuck, and she'd have a mental hold on him as long as she could manage it. I could have taken up space and prevented it, but that would have sucked for me, too. I saw how it was going to play out, but both paths were crap.
I don't know. I guess it's better to see it coming. (By the way, I was absolutely on point- they are also married, now.)
I pass up opportunities to take up space. Often. Just because I'm not enthusiastic about either outcome. And I wonder what the chances are that I could be wrong. That I'm actually passing up on great opportunities, if I had just stuck with it. Just, see what happens. Don't analyze it. But it's so hard not to, when it seems so clear.
There just doesn't seem to be any incentive. What's the point in doing something if it doesn't make you scream "YES! Let's fucking do that!"
I'll be honest, I wouldn't want to take a path with someone who just didn't have any better options. Someone who's just taking up space.. Because that better path might be closer than you think - but impossible to see with a Snorlax in the way.