Friends
They are my world, they are my family...since I was younger I have been distant from my biological family because of a lot of stupid things that ended up happening with all of us and so most of my life I devoted to my friends whom I seemed to see more often than my own flesh n blood. Because of this I have relied on the strength and comfort to come from my friendships, here I am a couple years later though, off in another state. My best friend is dead for unexplainable reasons, no possible way to get closure on that one, my other best friend decides to be stupid and has a zero percent availability rate at all times now and when I need someone to talk to especially. Still wants to be friends however yet keeps no tabs on me...great logic.
My other friends I have never really allowed to get to the point that I share my personal stuff mainly because I hold some heavy burdens that no one else should ever carry, so I try to look out for them instead and release as little as possible which means now I have nobody to vent to unless I wanna start dragging new people down with me. And I feel that nobody deserves that. I've rekindled some old friendships which is nice but I still have work to do before I open up. Then there's my need to help people, I cant stand by and watch my friends suffer so I try to take on some of their weight so it becomes bearable for them. I hate seeing people in pain and I often wish I could suffer alone sometimes so others dont have to, but I cant so I help as much as possible so they can feel better. That's all I have for now, I hope you all have a great evening :) Goodnight friends, I love you all very much.
Nate :D
My other friends I have never really allowed to get to the point that I share my personal stuff mainly because I hold some heavy burdens that no one else should ever carry, so I try to look out for them instead and release as little as possible which means now I have nobody to vent to unless I wanna start dragging new people down with me. And I feel that nobody deserves that. I've rekindled some old friendships which is nice but I still have work to do before I open up. Then there's my need to help people, I cant stand by and watch my friends suffer so I try to take on some of their weight so it becomes bearable for them. I hate seeing people in pain and I often wish I could suffer alone sometimes so others dont have to, but I cant so I help as much as possible so they can feel better. That's all I have for now, I hope you all have a great evening :) Goodnight friends, I love you all very much.
Nate :D