In The Land Of Aellig, No One Can Hear You Scream
Anytime Aellig's family gets together, you know a significant amount of craziness will ensue. Add Handrigan and myself to the mix and the result is a level of lunacy typically reached while under the influence of illegal substances. Such was the case last night. Here's a sampler:
"His daughter's friends referred to him as Charles Manson in the early 90's."
-Referring to his Uncle Ron
"Here's that shot of you looking like you're trying out to be a porn star."
-Aellig's aunt to his mom
"I'm making a raft. There's no other way off this island."
-Aellig explaining why he has lashed Handrigan's, his girlfriend's, and my legs together with climbing rope. The island part is a mystery.
"Put that sword away, that's how your uncle lost his eye!"
-Aellig's aunt. She was corrected when it was pointed out that a boken was the culprit, not a broadsword.
"Have we given her the icepick test yet?"
"No, but she hasn't been either of our girlfriends."
-Aellig and Handrigan referring to how I haven't been hazed like their girlfriends. Whatever the icepick test is, bring it on.
"You don't even flinch anymore."
"That annoys you, doesn't it?"
"Yes it does."
-Aellig and I as he swung a machete around my neck
Everyone was sober for all of this. They got less crazy once they started drinking. And people tell me my family is weird.
"His daughter's friends referred to him as Charles Manson in the early 90's."
-Referring to his Uncle Ron
"Here's that shot of you looking like you're trying out to be a porn star."
-Aellig's aunt to his mom
"I'm making a raft. There's no other way off this island."
-Aellig explaining why he has lashed Handrigan's, his girlfriend's, and my legs together with climbing rope. The island part is a mystery.
"Put that sword away, that's how your uncle lost his eye!"
-Aellig's aunt. She was corrected when it was pointed out that a boken was the culprit, not a broadsword.
"Have we given her the icepick test yet?"
"No, but she hasn't been either of our girlfriends."
-Aellig and Handrigan referring to how I haven't been hazed like their girlfriends. Whatever the icepick test is, bring it on.
"You don't even flinch anymore."
"That annoys you, doesn't it?"
"Yes it does."
-Aellig and I as he swung a machete around my neck
Everyone was sober for all of this. They got less crazy once they started drinking. And people tell me my family is weird.