hm.
Well, as usual, I've been a big dumb jerk. I guess I should have seen this coming. But there's this thing about apathy... you don't know how it affects other people until you see the train tracks. I've clawed myself kicking and screaming out of apathy because I endangered something I cared about.
That something I cared about was obviously not me, because since when have I given a damn. My only chance was to make a better future for myself; now the chances of that happening may be drastically reduced.
People are pissed off. As they should be.
And I'm sorry for hurting them and betraying trust, as people put it. However, what I'm not sorry for is the spam. When I gave up hope and did what I did all I did was join in what was already there - taking part in the "new" forum, the "change for the better" as some people said. Change - you wanted it; I showed you what it would be like.
I don't get it. I try to keep to the old and I get hammered for it. I change for you people and I get hammered for it. Ah well, there's no pleasing anyone these days, the internet being what it is.
You people may not believe in an ideal that I strive to be, but that's what keeps me going. Once I lost that, I lost the will to do anything. It's kind of like how people lose the will to live. The difference between them and me is that I haven't committed suicide yet.
I wish I was a kid again.
-c-evo.
That something I cared about was obviously not me, because since when have I given a damn. My only chance was to make a better future for myself; now the chances of that happening may be drastically reduced.
People are pissed off. As they should be.
And I'm sorry for hurting them and betraying trust, as people put it. However, what I'm not sorry for is the spam. When I gave up hope and did what I did all I did was join in what was already there - taking part in the "new" forum, the "change for the better" as some people said. Change - you wanted it; I showed you what it would be like.
I don't get it. I try to keep to the old and I get hammered for it. I change for you people and I get hammered for it. Ah well, there's no pleasing anyone these days, the internet being what it is.
You people may not believe in an ideal that I strive to be, but that's what keeps me going. Once I lost that, I lost the will to do anything. It's kind of like how people lose the will to live. The difference between them and me is that I haven't committed suicide yet.
I wish I was a kid again.
-c-evo.