version 8.34
haven't updated in a while and in that time span things happened...
imagine that...
probably most surprising is the following story: on st. patricks day, when christina and i deceided that the best way to show pride in our rich and varied culture was to play to the stereotype like a bad script reading...we spent the day by first going to molly malones in morris plains, then we went back to my house and watched boondock saints and finally we went to murphys hideaway in rockaway...i got a lot of fish and chips, which is really funny because i don't like fish...but i do like chips and the irish places have the malt vinegar for the chips as opposed to the waitress who looks at me like i have six heads and then brings out balsamic vinegar...but anyway, when we go molly malones there is a security guy...and he is hot...my type hot...i don't remember details particularly well, but i think he had tattoos, blue eyes, and very short hair...anyway, after some arguing and daring, he ends up getting my number from christina along with the words "my friend thinks you are hot, here is her number"...whatever, the guy is never going to call me so whatever...and yes, it may be a bit juvenile that my friend had to give the guy my number, but i can only try to braver a small step at a time...cause i've gotten tired of basically cowering in fear from rejection on all fronts...cause i'll never manage to get anywhere scared of someone not liking me either as a singer, or a person, or a woman...i mean, someone is going to not like me, so i might as well find out who they are...but i didn't have the balls to do it that day, so christina gave the guy my number and then i moved on with my life...
well last monday i got a text from this guy...well, that was really all sorts of wtf because i thought that the rules were you got numbers and then promptly forgot about them because the people who gave them to you are evidently losers...i don't know, no one has ever give me their number...so i have come up with thousands of reasons why he texts me...he just broke up with his girlfriend and wants to feel wanted and i'm obviously a loser, or maybe he is really lonely and just wants someone to talk to...but whatever...he seems like a nice guy...i just feel at a bit of a disadvantage because he knows where he stands with me (i.e. he knows that i think he is attractive) but i have no idea what he thinks of me (i.e. if i don't remember what he looks like all that well, he probably doesn't remember anything other than the fact that i wasn't so hideous it made him want to vomit...you would remember something like that)...but yeah...so interesting...really wasn't expecting that to happen at all...
starbucks is going alright...they have made some changes to both the espresso and the brewed coffee...i agree with them a lot as far as the aesthetics of this sort of thing goes, but it is really annoying on other levels...but i am going to have to start getting benefits from them because i am going to be done with school (until if and when i decied to go to graduate school) so i can no longer mooch off of my father's health care...its not really bad...i basically work the required hours a week anyway, i just have to be more careful about making sure they are definatly maintained...but at least i have the ability to get them and everything...when i start getting the benefits i'm probably going to start taking money out for the 401K that they offer as well...which means that i won't be getting as much in my paycheck as i would have before...which is sort of annoying, but it is either health care and some money out of my paycheck, or paying out my arse everytime i need to do something medical...you know, like the eyecare and the asthma medications that need to be taken care of on at least a yearly basis...there are still some problems i have with the job, of course...it would be lie to say that i liked it...but i do get paid and i get good benefits and all that sort of thing, so i could be doing far worse...
i am working on the debts that i have...they aren't that big of a deal...if i keep making the same amount of payments i've been making i should be done with them in twenty four months...a long time, true...but...since they are too my father i don't have interest...i wanted to move into an apartment, but i don't really know if that is possible with all the money that i seem to keep losing to pay my father and my bills and i really don't make that much...but i should be able to make more at least in this year when i am not going to classes anymore...i have more open time to work...so i think over the summer, along with taking piano lessons (which is something i keep on putting off and putting off that i really need to take care of) i am going to start looking at the prices for apartments...so, we'll see what happens with that...
luckily, i will also be starting a new job in mid may...i got a job as a voice teacher at a music studio in rockaway...which is nice and close by to not only my house, but my other job so i can easily get from one to the other...i'm really excited about this...and the teachers are all about my age, so maybe i can meet other people and expand my social circle outwards of the three people that i have regular contact with...yeah, that is a bit of a stretch and all, but i think it might just be plausible...so this should be a new and exciting experience...
i also got accepted into intermezzo foundations young artist program...it will be in brugge belgium...i had to walk across a glass beach in hell to get the information, and i have a really small part that is more like a sextet for about ten minutes, which seems so damned foolish to drag my ass all the way across the fucking atlantic ocean for it, but there will also be master classes and lessons and french lessons and auditions for european houses, so whatever...maybe someone will deceide not to go...or maybe i'll just suck it up and realize that no matter what this is still cool...i get to sing opera in europe, no matter which way you look at it...i'm more than slightly nervous about flying...i've never flown alone and i really don't like flying, but again, something i'm just going to have to suck up and deal with...
so needless to say, between actually getting accepted into something like this and a guy actually calling me, my brain has been going through some serious mind fucking, because that would mean that i would have to live in a world where i accepted that fact that i am a good singer and an attractive person...however, i choose to believe that no matter what i got a really small part and he was probably just lonely and wanted to talk to someone (despite the fact i have spoken to him on other occasions)...
other fun things of note: i have two partch concerts, both of which i am doing it must be time for...i'm hoping that for the wednesday at one on the twenty third it might be possible to do greek studies with joe, but who knows...on sunday may 4 at 3:00pm i will be in the opera at school...it is il giovedi grasso...a one act italian comedy by donizetti...i am looking forward to that...i need to reschedule my recital as well...it is looking like it is going to be in june right now, since i will be gone in july and prof. gall will be gone in august...so maybe getting done with this performers certificate won't be as glitch free as i am hoping but who the hell knows...maybe it will actually work out for me...
on the eighteenth of april i am going to the music department formal...which is surprising as all hell and i might have already mentioned...but i have the invite right in front of me...i am doing the green dress...i am hoping that i won't be too dressed up, although it is a formal, so how can one be too dressy for a formal? but it is the green dress with a bunch of black accessories...i figure that if i am going to this thing, i am going to look like a damned soprano to do it...but i have the ticket sitting right in front of me on my desk, so it is offical...i have also learned that my ability to zip up a dress that zips up the back is quite uncanny...
i got flogging molly's new cd...absolutly fantastic...i think i will always like within a mile from home the best if only for don't let me die still wandering...that song alone blows every other album out of the water...but float is seriously amazing...
i am going to the met on the 15th of april...honestly, i am competely looking forward to that...i haven't been there in a while and i try to go every year...i didn't make it this past year cause i usually try to make it a summer thing and i didn't get there this summer...maybe, because i have to bring a camera cause i am going for a project and i have to take pictures of stuff, i can go and see if i can find the giant buddha again, and when i do i will take a picture to prove to everyone that while i may be completely out of it, and it seriously isn't that odd that i am having hallucinations, the giant buddha isn't one of them...that statue is real, just like the italian courtyard i could never find again...seriously if the whole place wasn't so damned huge i wouldn't feel like i was losing my mind every time i visit...and for future reference, the really big statue of shiva is NOT the fucking huge buddha...
i was seriously expecting this post to be much longer...there was an anticipation of this gigantic post that just kept on going and going and going (which this one very well might) with no respite in sight...but i guess those were nothing more than delusions of grandeur on the part of my writing prowess...
note to readers: there is totally a spell check button on this thing...i am totally ignoring it...
imagine that...
probably most surprising is the following story: on st. patricks day, when christina and i deceided that the best way to show pride in our rich and varied culture was to play to the stereotype like a bad script reading...we spent the day by first going to molly malones in morris plains, then we went back to my house and watched boondock saints and finally we went to murphys hideaway in rockaway...i got a lot of fish and chips, which is really funny because i don't like fish...but i do like chips and the irish places have the malt vinegar for the chips as opposed to the waitress who looks at me like i have six heads and then brings out balsamic vinegar...but anyway, when we go molly malones there is a security guy...and he is hot...my type hot...i don't remember details particularly well, but i think he had tattoos, blue eyes, and very short hair...anyway, after some arguing and daring, he ends up getting my number from christina along with the words "my friend thinks you are hot, here is her number"...whatever, the guy is never going to call me so whatever...and yes, it may be a bit juvenile that my friend had to give the guy my number, but i can only try to braver a small step at a time...cause i've gotten tired of basically cowering in fear from rejection on all fronts...cause i'll never manage to get anywhere scared of someone not liking me either as a singer, or a person, or a woman...i mean, someone is going to not like me, so i might as well find out who they are...but i didn't have the balls to do it that day, so christina gave the guy my number and then i moved on with my life...
well last monday i got a text from this guy...well, that was really all sorts of wtf because i thought that the rules were you got numbers and then promptly forgot about them because the people who gave them to you are evidently losers...i don't know, no one has ever give me their number...so i have come up with thousands of reasons why he texts me...he just broke up with his girlfriend and wants to feel wanted and i'm obviously a loser, or maybe he is really lonely and just wants someone to talk to...but whatever...he seems like a nice guy...i just feel at a bit of a disadvantage because he knows where he stands with me (i.e. he knows that i think he is attractive) but i have no idea what he thinks of me (i.e. if i don't remember what he looks like all that well, he probably doesn't remember anything other than the fact that i wasn't so hideous it made him want to vomit...you would remember something like that)...but yeah...so interesting...really wasn't expecting that to happen at all...
starbucks is going alright...they have made some changes to both the espresso and the brewed coffee...i agree with them a lot as far as the aesthetics of this sort of thing goes, but it is really annoying on other levels...but i am going to have to start getting benefits from them because i am going to be done with school (until if and when i decied to go to graduate school) so i can no longer mooch off of my father's health care...its not really bad...i basically work the required hours a week anyway, i just have to be more careful about making sure they are definatly maintained...but at least i have the ability to get them and everything...when i start getting the benefits i'm probably going to start taking money out for the 401K that they offer as well...which means that i won't be getting as much in my paycheck as i would have before...which is sort of annoying, but it is either health care and some money out of my paycheck, or paying out my arse everytime i need to do something medical...you know, like the eyecare and the asthma medications that need to be taken care of on at least a yearly basis...there are still some problems i have with the job, of course...it would be lie to say that i liked it...but i do get paid and i get good benefits and all that sort of thing, so i could be doing far worse...
i am working on the debts that i have...they aren't that big of a deal...if i keep making the same amount of payments i've been making i should be done with them in twenty four months...a long time, true...but...since they are too my father i don't have interest...i wanted to move into an apartment, but i don't really know if that is possible with all the money that i seem to keep losing to pay my father and my bills and i really don't make that much...but i should be able to make more at least in this year when i am not going to classes anymore...i have more open time to work...so i think over the summer, along with taking piano lessons (which is something i keep on putting off and putting off that i really need to take care of) i am going to start looking at the prices for apartments...so, we'll see what happens with that...
luckily, i will also be starting a new job in mid may...i got a job as a voice teacher at a music studio in rockaway...which is nice and close by to not only my house, but my other job so i can easily get from one to the other...i'm really excited about this...and the teachers are all about my age, so maybe i can meet other people and expand my social circle outwards of the three people that i have regular contact with...yeah, that is a bit of a stretch and all, but i think it might just be plausible...so this should be a new and exciting experience...
i also got accepted into intermezzo foundations young artist program...it will be in brugge belgium...i had to walk across a glass beach in hell to get the information, and i have a really small part that is more like a sextet for about ten minutes, which seems so damned foolish to drag my ass all the way across the fucking atlantic ocean for it, but there will also be master classes and lessons and french lessons and auditions for european houses, so whatever...maybe someone will deceide not to go...or maybe i'll just suck it up and realize that no matter what this is still cool...i get to sing opera in europe, no matter which way you look at it...i'm more than slightly nervous about flying...i've never flown alone and i really don't like flying, but again, something i'm just going to have to suck up and deal with...
so needless to say, between actually getting accepted into something like this and a guy actually calling me, my brain has been going through some serious mind fucking, because that would mean that i would have to live in a world where i accepted that fact that i am a good singer and an attractive person...however, i choose to believe that no matter what i got a really small part and he was probably just lonely and wanted to talk to someone (despite the fact i have spoken to him on other occasions)...
other fun things of note: i have two partch concerts, both of which i am doing it must be time for...i'm hoping that for the wednesday at one on the twenty third it might be possible to do greek studies with joe, but who knows...on sunday may 4 at 3:00pm i will be in the opera at school...it is il giovedi grasso...a one act italian comedy by donizetti...i am looking forward to that...i need to reschedule my recital as well...it is looking like it is going to be in june right now, since i will be gone in july and prof. gall will be gone in august...so maybe getting done with this performers certificate won't be as glitch free as i am hoping but who the hell knows...maybe it will actually work out for me...
on the eighteenth of april i am going to the music department formal...which is surprising as all hell and i might have already mentioned...but i have the invite right in front of me...i am doing the green dress...i am hoping that i won't be too dressed up, although it is a formal, so how can one be too dressy for a formal? but it is the green dress with a bunch of black accessories...i figure that if i am going to this thing, i am going to look like a damned soprano to do it...but i have the ticket sitting right in front of me on my desk, so it is offical...i have also learned that my ability to zip up a dress that zips up the back is quite uncanny...
i got flogging molly's new cd...absolutly fantastic...i think i will always like within a mile from home the best if only for don't let me die still wandering...that song alone blows every other album out of the water...but float is seriously amazing...
i am going to the met on the 15th of april...honestly, i am competely looking forward to that...i haven't been there in a while and i try to go every year...i didn't make it this past year cause i usually try to make it a summer thing and i didn't get there this summer...maybe, because i have to bring a camera cause i am going for a project and i have to take pictures of stuff, i can go and see if i can find the giant buddha again, and when i do i will take a picture to prove to everyone that while i may be completely out of it, and it seriously isn't that odd that i am having hallucinations, the giant buddha isn't one of them...that statue is real, just like the italian courtyard i could never find again...seriously if the whole place wasn't so damned huge i wouldn't feel like i was losing my mind every time i visit...and for future reference, the really big statue of shiva is NOT the fucking huge buddha...
i was seriously expecting this post to be much longer...there was an anticipation of this gigantic post that just kept on going and going and going (which this one very well might) with no respite in sight...but i guess those were nothing more than delusions of grandeur on the part of my writing prowess...
note to readers: there is totally a spell check button on this thing...i am totally ignoring it...