Fic: I Can Haz Chylar? NO? I CAN HAZ CHETRELLIS?

Sep 09, 2007 23:53

Title: I CAN HAZ CHYLAR? NO? I CAN HAS CHETRELLIS?
Author: .. FINE. It's me. I admit to it.
Rating: PG-13.. MAYBE.
Characters: CHYLAR, CHATHAN, AND.. CHONTY.
Summary: CHANDRA SURESH SHARES HIS THOUGHTS.
Warnings: CHYLAR, CHATHAN, AND CHONTY.



It had been long and tiresome, this quest to find people with special abilities and particularly when everyone was being so uncooperative and the general consensus was that Chandra Suresh was certifiably insane.

There was nothing insane about Chandra Suresh. He was very sane, right down to the man cardigans he stole from Gabriel Gray’s laundry basket at the local Laundromat.

There was nothing at all insane about following Gabriel Gray to the Laundromat.

Likewise, there was also nothing at all insane about disguising as an oversized box of dryer sheets, resting against Gabriel Gray’s laundry basket while meanwhile sniffing his-

Oh no, nothing at all insane about Chandra Suresh WHATSOEVER.

Which was precisely why he was now pulling a Mrs. Doubtfire and attempting to become the nanny of Nathan Petrelli’s children. Now that his wife was in a wheelchair, and not even a jet-powered one, he surely needed some more assistants.

Oh he knew about the politician and his power to fly. Getting into a special person’s house was the best way to learn more about them and figure out how to get them more cooperative to his every whim. They were scientific whims. That had to count for something, didn’t it?

So maybe Chandra’s plan didn’t go precisely as planned. It really wasn’t part of the plan to be kicked out of the Petrelli mansion because “You freak! You’re not a woman! WOMEN DON’T HAVE BEARDS! As the future owner of the Pasdabeard, I vanquish thee!”

Nathan Petrelli had officially lost the votes of any and all bearded women who would be voting in the upcoming election. In fact, Chandra Suresh would later try to form a Society of Bearded Women Against Nathan Petrelli and be subsequently banned from his own organization due to an oversight on his part that he wasn’t really a woman at all.

Too bad, really, because Nathan Petrelli looked damn good in blue pajama pants and that was a sight that Chandra wouldn’t have needed much time to get used to seeing.

But the biggest loss out of the whole deal wasn’t Nathan at all. It wasn’t Heidi either. Or Angela (who seemed to live there too but Chandra wasn’t sure). And obviously it wasn’t Simon (his allergy to strawberries was an indication of weak genetics and Chandra had no time for that.. just right now, anyways).

But the other. OH the other.

Every time Chandra gazed upon him, it was as if he emitted the most heavenly of glowing lights. He surely was the embodiment of perfection and Chandra was positive that in his entire life, he had never seen anything like it. It didn’t even matter that he might not even have any sort of abilities or anything at all that distinguished him from everyone else on the planet aside from being the object of Chandra Suresh’s every desire.

Monty Petrelli was surely a god amongst children.

Their love, it was unlike any other. Now granted Nathan Petrelli would quite possibly put up a million restraining orders against Chandra (because Nathan was OBVIOUSLY in love with Chandra as well) if he found Chandra sneaking around the Petrelli mansion and attempting to elope with his son, but that only made Chandra desire him even more.

This was beyond mere forbidden fruit. This was an entire forbidden fruit salad.

But for now, Chandra would have to be content with admiring from afar. But they would have their day.

It was only a matter of time. Chandra Suresh was fully prepared to make like Chuck Norris and he would not sleep, he would WAIT.

blame: jesslared, rating: pg-13, ship: chathan, ship: chylar, fic: crack, ship: chonty

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