"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese."
Gather ye round, my pretties, for I have a tale to tell.
Ooh, look what a liar I am! It's not really a tale. More of a... thing. So. New Year's resolutions. Load of bollocks, as any fule kno. Still, I have never been one to let something being a load of bollocks stop me from doing it. Thus (as you may have deduced, from my terse prose and no-nonsense sentence structure), I have fashioned for myself a New Year's resolution. And not that I want to brag or anything, but it's a beauty. Forget that losing weight malarkey, or not spending loads of money on tat and books, or going vegan, or not saying bad things about weirdos, or keeping one's finger on the pulse, as 'twere, of celebdom. These are games for schoolchildren.
Here is mine.
::drum roll::
::retract drum roll::
Actually, a little background info might be pertinent at this point. I have a weakness for cookery books. I do so love them. They're all pretty and colourful and have nice food in them. Mmm. Food. So, I have quite a lot of them (and acquired two in the past week: a Gordon Ramsay one from my cousin for Christmas, and Delia's Frugal Food, which arrived today from Amazon. I paid for it. They didn't send it as a gift. More's the pity), but rarely do I ever actually cook anything from them. I either cook spag bol (natch), or something my mother used to cook, or something random that I think might use up some ingredients (mmm, tuna lentil spectacular...). And it's a shame. And a waste of a shelf.
::drum roll::
So in 2009, I will attempt a magnificent feat. A feat, I think I can confidently claim, unmatched by any person living or dead. A feat of such magnitude it will be spoken of in hushed whispers and awed murmurs.
::another drum roll, as I got a bit carried away there::
I will make a recipe out of each of my cookery books.
WOOO!! How exciting is that?!!!! I know!!! *makes I-know face*
And I don't stop there. Oh no. I've actually STARTED this amazing quest! (OK, I know it's not quite 2009 yet, but whatevs, live with it.)
Cookery Book: Katie Stewart's The Times Cookery Book
Provenance: My mother's favourite; I have an old, decrepit copy that she gave me.
Picture Level: Shit: none at all! I don't understand why cookery books don't have pictures! Why, Englebert? Did they not read their Alice?
Recipe: Kedgeree
Ingredients: Smoked fish, rice, eggs, onion, lemon, seasoning
Why Chosen: Smoked fish was dead cheap in Tesco, and wanted to try kedgeree. This seemed like the best recipe.
Outcome: OMG, that was delicious!! I have actually given myself indigestion! Will definitely be cooking this one again.
Mess Created: Well, I used quite a lot of stuff, but it's quite staged, so I had time to clear up after myself a tiny bit. I mean, it's still a mess, but it could have been way worse if I'd just left everything out.
Ooh, look what a liar I am! It's not really a tale. More of a... thing. So. New Year's resolutions. Load of bollocks, as any fule kno. Still, I have never been one to let something being a load of bollocks stop me from doing it. Thus (as you may have deduced, from my terse prose and no-nonsense sentence structure), I have fashioned for myself a New Year's resolution. And not that I want to brag or anything, but it's a beauty. Forget that losing weight malarkey, or not spending loads of money on tat and books, or going vegan, or not saying bad things about weirdos, or keeping one's finger on the pulse, as 'twere, of celebdom. These are games for schoolchildren.
Here is mine.
::drum roll::
::retract drum roll::
Actually, a little background info might be pertinent at this point. I have a weakness for cookery books. I do so love them. They're all pretty and colourful and have nice food in them. Mmm. Food. So, I have quite a lot of them (and acquired two in the past week: a Gordon Ramsay one from my cousin for Christmas, and Delia's Frugal Food, which arrived today from Amazon. I paid for it. They didn't send it as a gift. More's the pity), but rarely do I ever actually cook anything from them. I either cook spag bol (natch), or something my mother used to cook, or something random that I think might use up some ingredients (mmm, tuna lentil spectacular...). And it's a shame. And a waste of a shelf.
::drum roll::
So in 2009, I will attempt a magnificent feat. A feat, I think I can confidently claim, unmatched by any person living or dead. A feat of such magnitude it will be spoken of in hushed whispers and awed murmurs.
::another drum roll, as I got a bit carried away there::
I will make a recipe out of each of my cookery books.
WOOO!! How exciting is that?!!!! I know!!! *makes I-know face*
And I don't stop there. Oh no. I've actually STARTED this amazing quest! (OK, I know it's not quite 2009 yet, but whatevs, live with it.)
Cookery Book: Katie Stewart's The Times Cookery Book
Provenance: My mother's favourite; I have an old, decrepit copy that she gave me.
Picture Level: Shit: none at all! I don't understand why cookery books don't have pictures! Why, Englebert? Did they not read their Alice?
Recipe: Kedgeree
Ingredients: Smoked fish, rice, eggs, onion, lemon, seasoning
Why Chosen: Smoked fish was dead cheap in Tesco, and wanted to try kedgeree. This seemed like the best recipe.
Outcome: OMG, that was delicious!! I have actually given myself indigestion! Will definitely be cooking this one again.
Mess Created: Well, I used quite a lot of stuff, but it's quite staged, so I had time to clear up after myself a tiny bit. I mean, it's still a mess, but it could have been way worse if I'd just left everything out.