(no subject)
since my last fairly positive post my boyfriend has given up getting stoned. i thought i would be happy about it but its been an absolute nightmare. i know its hard to quit anything and ive tried really hard to be supportive. ive ignored his moods, forgiven his short temper and generally done the best i can. but its been 3 weeks now and he hasnt been anything other than bad tempered and mean. and i dont know how much more i can take. ive given up smoking so i know how stressfull the lack of nicotine is. but this is ridiculous. i dont know if im wrong to blame the nicotine withdrawl. maybe he's just a dick when he isnt stoned. i swear, he hasnt said a nice thing to me in weeks. tonight he was clearly in a bit of a mood so i just ignored it, made some dinner for us, and pottered about on my own. but i had to ask him a question about the computer and he went mental. telling me i was stupid and that i should just fucking leave him alone. im a pretty sensitive person and anyone that knows me will tell you im quick to cry. ive been trying so hard to be strong about this but i feel like im having a break down. im scared of how hes going to be when he comes home from work. im on edge all the time. he told me once in one of his calmer days that it wasnt me that made him mad it was just him. whatever, its me that bears the brunt of it. and i dont know if i can do this any more. i love him but he's starting to treat me like shit.