0021
Deciding
-Leah Bea
The wind was harsh on top of that building. The tallest building in the city - next to the one across town, of course. The night was perfect - the lights bright and the pollution hidden in the darkness. The sounds of the city did not reach her ears as she stood on the railing, looking down at the city. The wind rocked her - but she showed no fear. She watched the people below - it was too late for anyone who had a home to be out, but she found the people's misery below to be beautiful.
He came up behind her - not startling her for she was too calm. Her black hair flowed wildly behind her in the wind and her dark clothing fluttered noisily. Her lips did not part as she smiled a smile that did not reach her clouded eyes.
"What are you doing?" His voice was soft, caring - to much so it was nearly lost in the wind. It was the kind of voice that every girl wants to hear at one time or another in her life. She turned, but did not step down. She was struck by his beauty - his blonde hair waved lightly, regardless of the difficult wind, and his grey eyes reflected the light from the city while his white clothing was ripped at by the wind. He looked like a divine figure God accidentally cast down from his right hand side. Too perfect.
"Deciding." Her hazel eyes looked into his - searching for something. It seemed that she had found it and an odd smile touched her face before fleeing back into the darkness. He, having learned long ago not to, did not question what she was deciding. She usually kept her thoughts to herself - and he was rather glad for it. Sometimes the expression on her face scared him… It was unnatural.
"I love you." He said after a while - the wind snatched his words away, but she knew what he said. His face lit up then as an angelic smile graced it.
That’s right… I love him and that’s why… She thought, her fragile smile breaking. This angel does not belong - he needs to go back home…
"Will you stay with my forever?" It was one of his favorite questions to ask. She never answered it with words, but usually her dark eyes would soften - giving enough of an answer for him. This time, however, her eyes grew stormier and she turned her head away from him.
I can’t stay… I can’t even pretend that I will… One day I will die. How can I look at him and say ‘forever’ when I’m not sure on tomorrow? A frown clouded his face as she refused to answer in even the usual way. It was not right…
"Are you OK?" She had never reacted this way…
No… I’m not OK - but I will be for you… Ii know how beautifully cruel this would can be… And so, I will be OK for you and you alone… She whispered softly that she was fine, but the words are snatched away in the winds sharp talons.
I’m not OK, and you won’t be soon. That’s why…
"What will life be like tomorrow?" Yet another of his favorite questions. All ghosts of a smile fell away from her face, leaven her ashen grey and crestfallen. She looked at him for a moment and made the mistake of meeting his eyes - they glowed with the light of the city and some inner glow… Lovely…
Will tomorrow ever come, is the proper question… This world will destroy you soon… That’s why this needs to be done…
She faced the city once more and looked down. Only one man that she could see was in the streets. He was dressed in white and to her it seemed he was looking right into her soul - though she knew he probably couldn’t see her. She smiled mildly again. Looking over her shoulder, she whispered for him to join her on the railing. His eyes showed nothing but his utter trust in her as he took one faithful step towards her after the other. With every step she felt her heart constrict and beg him to not come to her - not to trust her. Tears began to well in her eyes as he climbed onto the railing. He then peered down at the street as she had.
"Beautiful…" He mumbled. She smiled once more and tried to shield her eyes from him. He was enraptured by the city and was startled when her arms encircled him. He quickly relaxed into her, breathing deep her Black Rose perfume… She always smelled like Death’s symbol…
"I love you." He said once more and she tightened her arms around him…
…and let go…
…he fell back - his balance lost - his beautiful grey eyes strangely calm as he met her own. No scream slipped through his throat. As he fell his arms went straight out from his sides and the city’s glow seemed to create wings for him to fly with. As she looked into his eyes, a tear fell from her own and he closed his - a peaceful expression across his face.
"I love you, Beautiful…" She said as she closed her eyes - never seeing him fall and seeing with her mind’s eye God picking up his child and returning back to the city of gold. A peaceful smile across her face as it had not in years while she whispered three words…
"And that’s why…"
And let herself fall…