39
First, a very happy birthday to raisedbypuppets! It's a badass day for a birthday--Hope it's the best year yet!
THE BIG GOAL:
When I was 20, I told myself I'd be a successful writer by the time I turned 40. I've always
been a realist, and while I daydreamed of making it big, I knew the reality of writing. I wanted to just be able to pay the bills and have money for travel from writing by the time I turned 40.
My definition of "successful writer" has changed; supplemental income or selling a novel by 40 is a realistic level of success for me. I've made money writing in that time, but in recent years that's slacked off.
I've written three novels in that time: the first one generated some interest, the second one I shelved, and the third one has dragged on and on and on. I'm not bummed about where I am as a writer, but I'm not where I knew I'd be.
I could convince myself that I'm successful in finding a balance between a decent day job and striving for my writing dream. I could convince myself that I'm successful because I wrote two novels while watching my sister die, working on the current novel through two bouts with a brain tumor, and that I keep at it despite other setbacks.
But life's all about setbacks and to tell myself it's all okay would be giving in. I have always expected more for myself. I'm not into self flagellation, but it's important to not make excuses no matter how hard things are or say you've done more than what most people would do given those hard times.
I'm not most people--I've been an incredibly driven person no matter what since childhood.
* * *
THE SUMMIT GOAL:
I've always dreamed big. I've always challenged myself. When I've wanted to do something--even if it's just a fleeting thought, I used to do it.
I have a little bit of an obsession with Mount Rainier.
It started when I worked a week in Seattle and wanted to get close to the mountain to take a picture. There was just something about this massive volcano sitting alone in the middle of nowhere. The thing looks bigger than it is, and it's a good sized hill. I've seen a lot of mountains, but nothing's seemed so majestic to me.
The day I tried getting a picture, clouds, other hills, and even tree obscured my view of the summit. I drove with a co-worker toward the mountain one afternoon, and only when we were driving away did the clouds break and reveal the summit. I wanted to turn back. My co-worker didn't.
I vowed that day that I'd see the summit while standing on the summit!
I've given myself until I'm 45.
* * *
THE JUGGLING GOAL:
I used to me able to juggle seven things. It was one of the best feelings in the world!
I'll do it again.
I'll do it before I turn 40.
* * *
THE HEALTH GOAL:
The three major goals--writing, climbing a mountain, and juggling seven things again--hinge on health.
I told myself I'd be fit by 40.
At the rate I'm going, I'll be fit before the end of the year.
I have this one all but wrapped up as far as I'm concerned. It's just a matter of time, and once I hit it, I'll know I can do anything!
* * *
One year to sell a novel or have a decent supplemental income from writing. This is probably the toughest of all my goals. But I'm not going to give in and adjust the timeline--I'll just work harder.
One year to juggle six and seven things again. I've done it before and I'll do it again.
One year to be at my ideal weight (whatever that turns out to be). I'll come in early on this one and it will allow me to make the other three big goals happen.
Six years to stand on the top of Mount Rainier. Cloudy day or not, I'll see the summit and know that I can do anything I put my mind to.
* * *
It's gonna be a good year...
THE BIG GOAL:
When I was 20, I told myself I'd be a successful writer by the time I turned 40. I've always
been a realist, and while I daydreamed of making it big, I knew the reality of writing. I wanted to just be able to pay the bills and have money for travel from writing by the time I turned 40.
My definition of "successful writer" has changed; supplemental income or selling a novel by 40 is a realistic level of success for me. I've made money writing in that time, but in recent years that's slacked off.
I've written three novels in that time: the first one generated some interest, the second one I shelved, and the third one has dragged on and on and on. I'm not bummed about where I am as a writer, but I'm not where I knew I'd be.
I could convince myself that I'm successful in finding a balance between a decent day job and striving for my writing dream. I could convince myself that I'm successful because I wrote two novels while watching my sister die, working on the current novel through two bouts with a brain tumor, and that I keep at it despite other setbacks.
But life's all about setbacks and to tell myself it's all okay would be giving in. I have always expected more for myself. I'm not into self flagellation, but it's important to not make excuses no matter how hard things are or say you've done more than what most people would do given those hard times.
I'm not most people--I've been an incredibly driven person no matter what since childhood.
* * *
THE SUMMIT GOAL:
I've always dreamed big. I've always challenged myself. When I've wanted to do something--even if it's just a fleeting thought, I used to do it.
I have a little bit of an obsession with Mount Rainier.
It started when I worked a week in Seattle and wanted to get close to the mountain to take a picture. There was just something about this massive volcano sitting alone in the middle of nowhere. The thing looks bigger than it is, and it's a good sized hill. I've seen a lot of mountains, but nothing's seemed so majestic to me.
The day I tried getting a picture, clouds, other hills, and even tree obscured my view of the summit. I drove with a co-worker toward the mountain one afternoon, and only when we were driving away did the clouds break and reveal the summit. I wanted to turn back. My co-worker didn't.
I vowed that day that I'd see the summit while standing on the summit!
I've given myself until I'm 45.
* * *
THE JUGGLING GOAL:
I used to me able to juggle seven things. It was one of the best feelings in the world!
I'll do it again.
I'll do it before I turn 40.
* * *
THE HEALTH GOAL:
The three major goals--writing, climbing a mountain, and juggling seven things again--hinge on health.
I told myself I'd be fit by 40.
At the rate I'm going, I'll be fit before the end of the year.
I have this one all but wrapped up as far as I'm concerned. It's just a matter of time, and once I hit it, I'll know I can do anything!
* * *
One year to sell a novel or have a decent supplemental income from writing. This is probably the toughest of all my goals. But I'm not going to give in and adjust the timeline--I'll just work harder.
One year to juggle six and seven things again. I've done it before and I'll do it again.
One year to be at my ideal weight (whatever that turns out to be). I'll come in early on this one and it will allow me to make the other three big goals happen.
Six years to stand on the top of Mount Rainier. Cloudy day or not, I'll see the summit and know that I can do anything I put my mind to.
* * *
It's gonna be a good year...