Abortion and men.

[porcelainberry]

I'm sure this topic is bound to come up now and again, but I haven't seen anything on the subject recently and with turnover in the community, I think it might be worth another post. Now, granted, the article itself is pretty old, but I only saw it the other day.

Article here: www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200406/hidden-male-grief

Comments

[littlegraytiger]

I don't think this article is trying to say whether or not men should have a say in an abortion their partner may have, I think what it's saying is that men can grieve too. But that there aren't any outlets for it. Even correct decisions can still be hard ones for some people and men are in an especially weird situation regarding abortion

[caliantrias]

Well, if I want my appendix removed, how much say should my wife have in it?

[kayla1906]

I think abortion is always the decision to be made by the mother, no exceptions. However, depending on the type of relationship that produced the pregnancy it should be discussed with the man. If it was a once night stand I would say there is no need to discuss it, the same for a casual relationship, or a relationship that is in the process of breaking up. If it is a committed ongoing relationship the man has a right to know and give his input, and then the woman can decide what she intends to do. Communication is always best in any relationship. I think it is always a good idea to let the man know what you intend to do should you become pregnant before you ever have sex with him. That way he can make his decision. I know this is not always practical, but it is a good idea.

[fallenintograce]

Agreed. Although the final decision should always belong to the woman, in an ideal situation both partners should talk about it and reach an agreement together.

[alopex]

I agree with this!

[arpzilla]

I would hope both partners, assuming a healthy relationship is there, would be discussing the matter. Not all relationships are healthy.

I just don't feel comfortable with any measure that would effectively force a woman to continue a pregnancy she doesn't want. She alone would have to face the risks associated with pregnancy and childbirth. It's not always easy and what if she ends up having complications? Does she get to sue him post-birth for any remaining damage done to her body, all for the sake of a child she didn't want? What about her remaining family, should she die? Do they get to sue, since it wasn't her choice to go ahead with the pregnancy?

[westly_roanoke]

I think that a guy should be able to voice his opinion, and seek grief counseling, but ultimately, it's the woman's decision.