Ack! Canucks = Robotic spies

[certainthings]

Apparently Todd Bertuzzi isn't a hockey player from Canada. But is in fact a spy.

His "stats" from canucks.com -

Position: Right Wing
Shoots: Left
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 245 lbs
Born: Sudbury, ON, Canada
Date: February 2, 1975

Now, compare that with his "stats" from here.

Height: 6-1
Weight: 205 lbs.
Pos: C
Shoots: Left
Born: December 12, 1979, Gorky, USSR

Part of me wants to alert CSIS or someone right away.

And holy crap. I just looked more and it turns out that Bertuzzi *and* Naslund are the same frickin' person.

Naslund's "stats"

Height: 6-1
Weight: 205 lbs.
Pos: C
Shoots: Left
Born: December 12, 1979, Gorky, USSR

Scratch that....all the Canucks seem to be the same person. Dear God, they're all robotic spies!

Conspiracy!!!