what a day to be alive:)
what a great autumn day!! It was cold and blustery..and I was in heaven*grin* I ran 7 miles today, but in truth-I should get to tack on an extra half mile or so just because for 1/2 of the way I was running into a pretty strong wind!
As often happens, while I was out running that was the time that I had to think...and I must admit that the entire time I was out today I just felt so alive-so great. I found myself feeling so appreciative for being alive today-to see the beautiful fall colors, to feel that cold wind on my face.. God does do pretty nice handywork when it comes to scenery. Another thought crossed my mind as I was running, I started thinking about all of the dreams that I have for my life..and just for fun, I thought I would list a few. Some are silly I suppose-but to me they are important..:)
not necessarily in any order..just writing them as they come to me....
-I would love to have 4 kids, and if I could choose I would say 2 girls and 2 boys-but then I would also be perfectly happy with happy, healthy children:)..kids are such an amazing gift from God!!
-Someday, I want to own a nice, two story house with at least 10 acres of land..with a few apple trees so my kids and grandkids can pick apples in the autumn and a field where my kids and I can plant our pumpkins for each Halloween.
-I want to live in a small town where you know your neighbors..where you smile at passerbyers..where you are safe walking in the evening and where children are safe playing in public areas.
-I want a family that loves each other so much..that does things every weekend together..camping, hiking, taking walks, going to sporting events...
-I want my kids to achieve their every one of their dreams..
-I want in my old age and when I am gone, to know that they are safe, and provided for. I want them to have a loving family of their own..so that when they hold their children they will better know just how much I loved them.
-I want a beautiful wife that genuinely is interested in my life and my interests..someone who is my best friend..my soul mate. I want a wife who loves me, and shows-and tells me so.
-I want my parents to see my children grow-I want them to know their grandchildren and I want my grandchildren to have fond memories of many, many times together with them.
-I would love to write a book someday..
-I would love to own a black sports ulitily vehicle..Hunter green would also work in a pinch:)
-I always want to be a fasincating person to know..someone with whom others feel better about themselves. I want to help others, I very much want to live in such a way that forever afterwards, my life will have mattered...
-I want my grandkids to know and love me. I want to read them stories and take walks together. I want to be healthy enough in my old age that I can play with them.
-I want to live to be at least 90, all the while healthy and in my right mind. I don't want to be a burden and I don't want to just "exist" for year and years..
-When I die, I want a large marker in some quiet timeless place-something to stand for centuries...I want future generations to know that once, long ago-a dreamer lived..I want them to know that once-I was.
At times I wonder what my life will be like..I wonder what my life story will be when-at the end, I look back over all the years. If I saw myself-say in 30 years-would I recognize myself? Would I like what I see? Would I be proud of the man I became? Would it be how I expected my life to be at that age?..
Many, many, many years from now, when I die, I want to die happy and fullfilled. Sometimes I wonder how many years I have-and often I wonder-if I had the chance..would I want to know ahead of time how my life would play out? I don't think I would. Much of life is what we make it, but I also believe that fate deals us hands and we have to play as best we can with the hand that we are given. For some reason that I don’t understand, sometimes fate is kinder to some than to others..
Some people are blessed with much happiness, and others face a live of trials and tribulations.. I don’t understand-it’s one of those things I will ask God someday. But until that day, I can’t help but look at my future with hope and yearning. I want to get it right-after all, we don’t get second takes.
It’s funny how when I think back to my school days. Anything and everything seemed possible. But as we move into adulthood it’s as if doors close and our path becomes narrower and narrower. We can always break free and take almost any path, but over time-our choices seem to become fewer because the path behind us is longer and we are somehow “confined”.. ah I don’t know if I am making sense here… I guess one way of looking at it is-when I first started college I remember thinking “wow, I can study anything-BE anything!”..but now I am a teacher..and I have a history degree. If I wanted, sure I could go back to college and study anything-but it would be very, very hard and I would have to give up quite a bit to “back up” and restart things.. I think a lot of life is like that for adults..
well, here I am-at 1:41 AM pondering life again. But you know-I am doing it with a smile. Life is good-hard at times, but good. It’s different, challenging and filled with ups and downs. Somedays I just want to get off the train and call it quits but today I found myself thanking God for being alive. Today was something to seeJ
g’night everyone.
