So much to write about....
Well now~it’s been awhile since I wrote an entry. This will be one humdinger of a post because I have so much to write about!
Finally this evening I am here with the time and the desire to spend some time thinking my way through a post. Over the past month there have been many evenings where I wanted to write, but for one reason or another-other demands on my time kept me from doing so.
Oh where to begin!…
First I guess should be the big news. I am older. :( In February I celebrated my 33rd birthday. My family planned a party for me which was nice. However, my nephew was born on the day after my birthday and so really-most of the celebration was focused on him which is where it should be. Birthdays are special times for kids. And since my brother is serving in Iraq I really wanted to be there for him as much as I could. I would imagine that it was tough on him not having his dad around.. And I can’t even begin to imagine how tough it was on my brother not being able to be there for his sons birthday:(
I would like to note before moving on-that I did manage to blow out all 33 candles on my cake! HA HA Thus far I have always been able to do that. I figure once I can’t do that-it means I have crossed over into well-older person land and I definitely want to hold off on that trip as long as possible! It was pretty funny though-I managed to get about 30 candles out no problem then the last three just didn’t want to go out! The very last candle was fighting me so I actually had to get up and jump up and down to force the last bit of air out of my lungs…but I succeeded getting them all out in one breath. Never mind the fact that I was quite literally seeing stars afterwards!
now, some other big news!
Around the middle of Feb. we had a major snow storm that made it completely impossibly to run for almost five weeks. So, confined to the house I decided that the best thing I could do-is read up on training for a marathon. I ordered and studied several marathon training books (and took many notes!), poured over countless internet marathon and running sites, visited the blogs and corresponded with other marathon runners and as the weeks passed by I became more comfortable with the exact demands that training for a marathon would require. And now-I have come to the conclusion that:
I am going to go for it.
I have decided that I will train for-and run in the Columbus Marathon!
Reaching that decision wasn’t an easy one to make. A marathon is such a huge monumental effort, I just wasn’t sure that it was “really” possible for the average guy to try. But from everything that I have been reading it is indeed possible-so long as I apply myself, train carefully and smartly and dedicate myself to the most trying physical task I have ever attempted.
And that’s the crux of it really. I love the challenge, it really is that simple. I love the fact that it is so…unbelievably difficult. Few have attempted it and even fewer have achieved it. I want to take rank with those who reached out and grasped for the best they could be.
In order to accomplish this I will have to reach down deep into myself and discover strength and determination that is beyond description, beyond what I can currently really imagine. It is true that I am intimidated-but I welcome that intimidation-I thrive on it. I know that the training (and the race itself) will be painful and exhausting but it’s almost like I welcome that pain-I want to run smack into it-and then cruise right over it. I want to face off against the impossible and sail beyond.
So let me back up a bit. Right around early Feb the snow and ice came. For just under five weeks it lingered. During that time I tried to run once but the sidewalks were still icy in so many places that it forced me onto the streets-and the streets weren’t much better! So I finally resigned myself to a form of hibernation. After that hibernation I actually was very afraid of just how far it would set me back in my fitness. During this time I actually gained three pounds!
And so last week with the snow finally gone, I pulled on my running gear and headed out into the cold. I planned a very easy 3 mile course-something designed to ease back into it. Those three miles were tough-very tough. I finished them but they hurt. My sides hurt, my legs felt weak and I was out of breath.. My worse fears were confirmed-those forced weeks off had set me back.
The next day I suited up again-and headed out for another 3 miles-and again..they hurt. The remainder of the week I kept it easy and slow-I didn’t want to push things too hard and get injured, but rather quickly I found that my strength and breath came back. By the end of the week I was running the 3 miles fairly strongly. Sure I wasn’t running it like I had been several weeks ago but at least I was on the rebound. What I didn't know was how long it would take me to retrain to where I had left off.
Then just this past Monday I started it up again. 3 miles on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday-rest on Thursday and then the long run on Friday. This was to be my test. It was a 6 mile run and I wasn’t at all sure how my body would handle it. I started slow and easy but the first 3 miles were moderately challenging. Part of the weakness was psychological because I could feel myself thinking “yeah-you’re ok now but you still have 3 more to go”. Then something happened that made me smile. I hit the three mile mark and it was literally as if my body downshifted. I literally felt strength surging through my legs. My heart suddenly seemed to find it’s rhythm and I couldn’t help but smile! Those last 3 miles were easy! I felt as if I was floating along, crusing. I wasn’t “quite” at my old level of fitness but I wasn’t too far off.
The next day I rested and then on Sunday~even though my training schedule didn’t call for it-I decided to take another 6 mile run. This time it was amazing! The first three miles were practically effortless and the last three felt awesome. I probably could have run 7 or 8 miles-and maybe more but I called it a night and came in to shower.
And that is where things stand. As part of my training it is highly recommended that I keep a running journal. Therefore at the end of my blog posts I will write out my milage and any short notes from my runs. Perhaps this will help anyone out there thinking of going for a marathon themselves or if not-they will at least help me keep a careful record of everything as I train.
yeah..I am going to run a Marathon:)
Now, moving on to other news..
I did it! I bought what I have been drooling over for weeks. I bought a Sony 46” 1080p LCD HDTV. Here is the exact model.
For weeks I researched exactly what model would be best..I asked around, visited the store four times just to study it..and the day before my birthday, I bought it.
After purchasing it and getting it home-I felt sick to my stomach because of how much it cost. I kept thinking-what else do I need, was this a responsible purchase? I am very much like that-I hate spending money and when something costs a lot of money I get very, very nervous. Usually I end up not even buying it but the tv in my study was going bad and I knew that I needed a tv-and if I was going to get an digital tv (since all tv’s will have to be digital by 2007 anyway), I figured I might as well get a nice one.
So for days I thought about it..prayed about it..and of course watched it. I have fallen completely in love with it! And I am not even a big tv watcher! The moves are breathtaking!~it’s almost like learning to watch tv all over again! I also bought an xbox 360 and let me tell you-playing the xbox on it is just well-FUN!
So anyway, I have decided to keep it:)
I also reactivated my World of Warcraft account and I have been goofing off a bit in there.
So, between running, watching tv, spending time with the family and well-life I haven’t had much time for other things. There just aren’t enough hours in the day to accomplish as much as I want to!
I received an email just today about my HS 15 year class reunion. I didn’t go to my ten year reunion, but I would like to go to this one. I figure each year there will be fewer and fewer people there, and this might be my last chance to see some old faces.
It’s kind of funny that the organizer sent these out because I have also been doing a lot of thinking about my life lately. As most of you know, over the last few years one of the things that has caused me the greatest amount of pain is having discovered that past friendships have indeed died. I still can’t really explain how much that hurt but over the last several weeks the obvious dawned on me. I have been clinging to the past, fighting to keep it alive when the truth of the matter is-I can’t.
The past is gone and in many cases, it exists only in my mind. I need to let go. I need to move on. Oh I can’t say that I can just snap my fingers and be done with everything, but I need to make more of an effort to let go. I have been hanging on to the past because I have been afraid that if I let go-it would vanish. But the truth of the matter is-it already has. I have the memories and I can never let those go, but no amount of wishing can bring those memories back. I will never be able to relive those time and most of the people, I will most likely never see again. In many cases, it is probably improper to even try to see them again.
So, I have felt my spirit slowly letting go in a way I have never felt before. It’s as if-this time, I really am letting go whereas before, it was only a temporary goodbye. I don’t know if this will make any sense at all, but hey-it does to me. Goodbye’s always suck, but I can’t cling to people and memories that are fighting to break away. Because in the end-if I cling, all I will end up with is embarrassment, feelings of bitterness and lonliness and a feeling of rejection. And those are all feelings I can do without.
Wow, page 4 here and I still feel like I am rushing through things!
I have auctioned off quite a bit of my possessions in There-almost $150.00 dollars worth. It’s kind of amazing how much I have accumulated over the three+ years of being a Thereian. I am not really “leaving”, but I am continuing to step back.
I am no longer as active as I used to be-mainly because there are so many young kids who are becoming members. Sometimes as I read the forums, it’s as if I can hear the world IQ level dropping when they log in. I don’t know what it is-maybe I am just getting old but kids annoy me when they refuse to write in a legible manner.. spelling errors, that annoying text message short hand..but it isn’t just that. Almost all of them are rude, brash and just plain-well annoying. There has always had a younger user base, but in the past they were intelligent and polite. This new crop of kids are just pathetic. What is it about the internet that attracts mindless, rude idiots?
But anyway, I still love There and I don’t think I could ever totally leave. It’s still my virtual home:) There are so many awesome people there.. I just hope that they aren’t all driven away by the mindless dolts that are joining in droves.
Ok well, I am going to wrap up. This has been one ridiculously long post! I hope everyone is doing well and even though I didn’t post the past month, I still thought of you.
Take care,
Jim
Marathon Training Log
Feb 19-25
Thur. 3 miles
Fri: 3 miles
weekly total: 6 miles
Feb. 26-March 4
Monday: 3 miles
Tuesday: 3 miles
Wednesday: 3 miles
Friday: 6 miles
Sunday: 6 miles
Weekly total: 21 miles
Training total: 27 miles