Death, Writing, and the word Tycoon
Briefly dropping in to say hello, LiveJournal, in a rare moment of internet access. I hope all of you are doing well. I'm doing slighly less well, as I spent the beginnings of this weekend with family at my grandmother's funeral. It wasn't as sad as it could have been, as she's been ready to go for years and thank God she's in a place where she's not in so much pain and grouchiness anymore. I wasn't that terribly close to her, either, as she was really cranky when I was younger. But watching my sisters weep was...well, it broke me. I guess I was crying for them, and finally crying for my grandfather who died this past winter, and another grandfather who died a few years ago, and a great-aunt who died this past May. It's been a really hard year for my family; my mom, for one, is not handling it well. But I liked that there was a sense of joy in the family that this grandmother was finally at peace and with her husband. Also, it was good to see one sister of mine who I very rarely see because she lives several states away.
It's also just been a weird summer in general, what with trying to find my place in things and moving around a lot, kind of living out of a suitcase. And I've had a lot of time for introspection, which is rarely good, as well as looking at a friendship of mine that has had some serious falls in the last year. I wonder lately if I'm not making some of the same mistakes with this friend that I made with a really close friend of mine in high school. I no longer talk to the high school friend because, at one crucial moment when I really, truly needed her, she was focused on her own problems, and I finally realized that she had always been focused on her own problems, using me as a therapist or rock to stand on or what-have-you. I don't mind this, but I realized I want my friendships to be honest; if she wanted me to be there for her all the time with nothing in return in terms of support, she needed to say so. What was killing me was that I kept expecting her to be there for me and she wasn't and didn't understand why I felt the expectation was unfulfilled.
I'm beginning to feel that this friend is doing the same. The latest is just petty, but really; my grandmother just died, and she sent me a message continuing a conversation complaining about her boyfriend. Again, it doesn't bother me that much, but not even a line of condolence? I hope your family is okay? I know she would say that since I never ask for such "aids", how can she know now that I'd like her to say something, but really. To me, this is less a matter of making me feel better and more about simple social constructions; at least make the effort.
Most of this also probably comes from a conversation I had with another friend of mine in which she asked me about the types of friendships that I have that I couldn't, and to a certain extent still can't, answer, and that sort of bothers me.
But anyway, that's neither here nor there. Sorry about the tangent. I intended to ask the small audience of this if you had book recommendations. You see, I'm working on a story in which a 10-year-old girl is trying to break a fear of, basically, monsters in the closet, and I was wondering if you had suggestions as to children's books that deal with being afraid and getting over it, stuff that that type of character could read to make her braver. I have a bit of a list already, but I wanted to see what you thought.
Oh, and I just wanted to note that the word "tycoon" is actually a pretty odd word, and not terribly often used these days. The era of tycoons has gone out, I suppose.
Right. Apologies for the melodrama. Have a less melodramatic quiz.Your Ideal Pet is a Cat
You're both aloof, introverted, and moody.
And your friends secretly wish that you were declawed!
What's Your Ideal Pet?Truth. Fish are pretty but dull, birds are nuts, and I like dogs but I've had enough of them. Also, I'm allergic to guinea pigs, so they're out.
It's also just been a weird summer in general, what with trying to find my place in things and moving around a lot, kind of living out of a suitcase. And I've had a lot of time for introspection, which is rarely good, as well as looking at a friendship of mine that has had some serious falls in the last year. I wonder lately if I'm not making some of the same mistakes with this friend that I made with a really close friend of mine in high school. I no longer talk to the high school friend because, at one crucial moment when I really, truly needed her, she was focused on her own problems, and I finally realized that she had always been focused on her own problems, using me as a therapist or rock to stand on or what-have-you. I don't mind this, but I realized I want my friendships to be honest; if she wanted me to be there for her all the time with nothing in return in terms of support, she needed to say so. What was killing me was that I kept expecting her to be there for me and she wasn't and didn't understand why I felt the expectation was unfulfilled.
I'm beginning to feel that this friend is doing the same. The latest is just petty, but really; my grandmother just died, and she sent me a message continuing a conversation complaining about her boyfriend. Again, it doesn't bother me that much, but not even a line of condolence? I hope your family is okay? I know she would say that since I never ask for such "aids", how can she know now that I'd like her to say something, but really. To me, this is less a matter of making me feel better and more about simple social constructions; at least make the effort.
Most of this also probably comes from a conversation I had with another friend of mine in which she asked me about the types of friendships that I have that I couldn't, and to a certain extent still can't, answer, and that sort of bothers me.
But anyway, that's neither here nor there. Sorry about the tangent. I intended to ask the small audience of this if you had book recommendations. You see, I'm working on a story in which a 10-year-old girl is trying to break a fear of, basically, monsters in the closet, and I was wondering if you had suggestions as to children's books that deal with being afraid and getting over it, stuff that that type of character could read to make her braver. I have a bit of a list already, but I wanted to see what you thought.
Oh, and I just wanted to note that the word "tycoon" is actually a pretty odd word, and not terribly often used these days. The era of tycoons has gone out, I suppose.
Right. Apologies for the melodrama. Have a less melodramatic quiz.Your Ideal Pet is a Cat
You're both aloof, introverted, and moody.
And your friends secretly wish that you were declawed!
What's Your Ideal Pet?Truth. Fish are pretty but dull, birds are nuts, and I like dogs but I've had enough of them. Also, I'm allergic to guinea pigs, so they're out.