Quote-O-Rama II
Although kids are better at it, people in general say the darndest things. In continuing honor of lily_handmaiden, I present here the memorable quotes of winter term 2009. Celtic Ink will resume its usual programming...later. Soon I'll be going abroad and then I'll figure the rest of my life out, so it may be a bit before I get on any sort of track that I may or may not have occupied at a former time of my life.
Neil on the continuing sex life of Moll Flanders: Right now it's like, is Charlie Brown really gonna kick the football?
Professor: Pope is so into Pope.
Katie on Macheath from "Beggar's Opera": Well, obviously, he's a total cad.
Prof: The way you pleasure yourself...soaking up a good book.
Prof on enjoyment of reading: Beaten right out of you be things like this class!
Dave: I totally worry about radioactive frat boys.
Dave: She starts young and ends dead, getting closer to zombification.
Prof: I actually enjoyed "Snakes on a Plane," but we're supposed to be talking about Wordsworth.
Neil on...Rime of the Ancient Mariner?: What am I gonna be scared of? Your head's on the ground.
Prof, who was only sort of kidding: If you don't like Keats, watch it. Unfortunately, I don't.
Dave on being emo: It's sort of like a cross between Kermit the Frog's body type and Edgar Allen Poe's mentality.
Dave on "Ode to Melancholy": This reminds me a lot of "Rent."
Prof being sarcastic: There's a poem, "The Angel in the House"--I totally see [celtic_songster] in that role.
Prof: Why do you think it's in right now to have long drapey hair, while you're a stick with boobs?
Prof: Jane is a very sexual being, and God knows Rochester is.
Prof: Professor T. calls this "The Womb Tomb"--she's a little more Freudian than I am.
Prof: The marriage was bad from the get-go, all sex and fighting.
Prof on "Windhover": It's not a kamikaze hawk, right.
Marshall: God doesn't like you when you're wrong about the Church.
Professor 1: The crusades began to develop things relating to feudalism; well, surprise.
Professor 2: Any of you stamp collectors? No? You're all insufficiently nerdy.
Prof 2 on Philip Augustus: He's smart, he's sneaky, he's the little engine that tries.
Prof 2: In [nearby large city] they're going to have a rally against child abuse...who's for child abuse?
Prof 2: Other rulers had been using the papacy as a kind of ecclesiastical football.
Prof 2 on medieval children: Those little guys who are right now squashing the windpipes of the dogs.
Prof 2: Middle Ages, you just wait long enough and somebody dies.
Prof 2: Like those folks in 1300, they're feeling pretty fat 'n' sassy.
Prof 2 on dealing with Mongols: You're not going to put on a leather bikini and go yip yip yip and take care of all those guys.
Prof 2: We're a little bit taller, thanks to Wonderbread and such.
Prof 2 on academic attire: By the way, doctors of philosophy have longer hoods than masters of arts; it's all very phallic.
Prof 2: Bear in mind, it's been a long time and my brain is rapidly declining.
Prof 2: I'm calling it his mid-life crisis, 'cause I'm in mid-life waiting for my crisis.
Prof 2: Brittany was sort of a football between the Angevins and France.
Prof 2: The best defense for the Trinity--good Irishman that I am--is still St. Patrick's shamrock.
Prof 2 on Abelard's castration: This is a message here, he's been thumped.
Prof 2: Rasputin--he's one tough guy, noe Energizer bunny of a bad dude.
Prof 2: When the weather gest warmer and you're sitting in your dorm rooms, ladies with your boyfriends, de-lousing each other...
Prof 2: Europeans, by the skin of their teeth and the help of some teenagers, are just barely reproducing.
Prof 2: Infallibility doesn't make a big difference in the day-to-day poping.
Prof 2 on getting married: Girls, I hope you're working on your hope chests. Guys, be careful, shop around.
Prof 2: I hope the Devil doesn't climb on top of you.
Prof 2: It's been my experience that clerics usually have a high opinion of their moms.
Prof 2: So let's watch that until it gets kind of stupid.
Prof 2: You didn't just toss up a cathedral in a year.
Professor: When people long for lo--pilgrimages! It's a bait and switch, people.
Prof: What Star Wars is to us, Troy is to the Middle Ages.
--Prof: He's a handsome monk.
--Emma: What a stud.
-Zach: I think they prefer "lady of the evening."
-Me: I have a feeling she struts around in mid-day.
Me: I prefer to think of St. Peter as an alien from the moon.
Prof: The Teseida is a big thick book. It is also excruciatingly long in parts.
-Prof: Is she worth it?
-Me: She is if she uses Loreal.
Emma: I will beseige your citadel for Dove Dark.
-Prof: It's sex for money.
-Me: Yes! That's always a good career choice.
Emma: Medieval faeries are like cats.
Me: The Pardoner--my anti-drug.
Prof: Suddenly you feel like, "I'm gonna shower, I'm gonna shave, I'm gonna eat a healthy meal and clean up my act!"
Prof: Military strategy, guys, has no place in a romance garden ever.
Prof on sex in romance genre: It isn't just described, "And they swince all the nicht!"
Prof on an unexpected and flat ending: And here you are, the jackass who's been getting invested.
Prof: Are you violent? Cool!
Zach: There's really no way to make this story pretty, 'cause somebody ends up losing their tongue.
Professor: Medievalist monarchans bad, they go in the corner too.
Emma: Repelling an aquatic beast by the virtue of a hot monk.
Prof: This is Satan and his merry men.
Prof: He doesn't have to hit the ground running so much as hit the water walking.
Chris and Kate: Jesus has legs, therefore ablative absolute.
Zach: Cherchez...la Cher?
Prof: The subjunctive is like pregnancy, you're either in it or you're not.
-Me: I think you think I'm kidding about the death in this room.
-Sarah: Kill me first!
Prof: Here, have some flight, it will be good for you.
Phil: And God said, "Let them be seized."
Neil on the continuing sex life of Moll Flanders: Right now it's like, is Charlie Brown really gonna kick the football?
Professor: Pope is so into Pope.
Katie on Macheath from "Beggar's Opera": Well, obviously, he's a total cad.
Prof: The way you pleasure yourself...soaking up a good book.
Prof on enjoyment of reading: Beaten right out of you be things like this class!
Dave: I totally worry about radioactive frat boys.
Dave: She starts young and ends dead, getting closer to zombification.
Prof: I actually enjoyed "Snakes on a Plane," but we're supposed to be talking about Wordsworth.
Neil on...Rime of the Ancient Mariner?: What am I gonna be scared of? Your head's on the ground.
Prof, who was only sort of kidding: If you don't like Keats, watch it. Unfortunately, I don't.
Dave on being emo: It's sort of like a cross between Kermit the Frog's body type and Edgar Allen Poe's mentality.
Dave on "Ode to Melancholy": This reminds me a lot of "Rent."
Prof being sarcastic: There's a poem, "The Angel in the House"--I totally see [celtic_songster] in that role.
Prof: Why do you think it's in right now to have long drapey hair, while you're a stick with boobs?
Prof: Jane is a very sexual being, and God knows Rochester is.
Prof: Professor T. calls this "The Womb Tomb"--she's a little more Freudian than I am.
Prof: The marriage was bad from the get-go, all sex and fighting.
Prof on "Windhover": It's not a kamikaze hawk, right.
Marshall: God doesn't like you when you're wrong about the Church.
Professor 1: The crusades began to develop things relating to feudalism; well, surprise.
Professor 2: Any of you stamp collectors? No? You're all insufficiently nerdy.
Prof 2 on Philip Augustus: He's smart, he's sneaky, he's the little engine that tries.
Prof 2: In [nearby large city] they're going to have a rally against child abuse...who's for child abuse?
Prof 2: Other rulers had been using the papacy as a kind of ecclesiastical football.
Prof 2 on medieval children: Those little guys who are right now squashing the windpipes of the dogs.
Prof 2: Middle Ages, you just wait long enough and somebody dies.
Prof 2: Like those folks in 1300, they're feeling pretty fat 'n' sassy.
Prof 2 on dealing with Mongols: You're not going to put on a leather bikini and go yip yip yip and take care of all those guys.
Prof 2: We're a little bit taller, thanks to Wonderbread and such.
Prof 2 on academic attire: By the way, doctors of philosophy have longer hoods than masters of arts; it's all very phallic.
Prof 2: Bear in mind, it's been a long time and my brain is rapidly declining.
Prof 2: I'm calling it his mid-life crisis, 'cause I'm in mid-life waiting for my crisis.
Prof 2: Brittany was sort of a football between the Angevins and France.
Prof 2: The best defense for the Trinity--good Irishman that I am--is still St. Patrick's shamrock.
Prof 2 on Abelard's castration: This is a message here, he's been thumped.
Prof 2: Rasputin--he's one tough guy, noe Energizer bunny of a bad dude.
Prof 2: When the weather gest warmer and you're sitting in your dorm rooms, ladies with your boyfriends, de-lousing each other...
Prof 2: Europeans, by the skin of their teeth and the help of some teenagers, are just barely reproducing.
Prof 2: Infallibility doesn't make a big difference in the day-to-day poping.
Prof 2 on getting married: Girls, I hope you're working on your hope chests. Guys, be careful, shop around.
Prof 2: I hope the Devil doesn't climb on top of you.
Prof 2: It's been my experience that clerics usually have a high opinion of their moms.
Prof 2: So let's watch that until it gets kind of stupid.
Prof 2: You didn't just toss up a cathedral in a year.
Professor: When people long for lo--pilgrimages! It's a bait and switch, people.
Prof: What Star Wars is to us, Troy is to the Middle Ages.
--Prof: He's a handsome monk.
--Emma: What a stud.
-Zach: I think they prefer "lady of the evening."
-Me: I have a feeling she struts around in mid-day.
Me: I prefer to think of St. Peter as an alien from the moon.
Prof: The Teseida is a big thick book. It is also excruciatingly long in parts.
-Prof: Is she worth it?
-Me: She is if she uses Loreal.
Emma: I will beseige your citadel for Dove Dark.
-Prof: It's sex for money.
-Me: Yes! That's always a good career choice.
Emma: Medieval faeries are like cats.
Me: The Pardoner--my anti-drug.
Prof: Suddenly you feel like, "I'm gonna shower, I'm gonna shave, I'm gonna eat a healthy meal and clean up my act!"
Prof: Military strategy, guys, has no place in a romance garden ever.
Prof on sex in romance genre: It isn't just described, "And they swince all the nicht!"
Prof on an unexpected and flat ending: And here you are, the jackass who's been getting invested.
Prof: Are you violent? Cool!
Zach: There's really no way to make this story pretty, 'cause somebody ends up losing their tongue.
Professor: Medievalist monarchans bad, they go in the corner too.
Emma: Repelling an aquatic beast by the virtue of a hot monk.
Prof: This is Satan and his merry men.
Prof: He doesn't have to hit the ground running so much as hit the water walking.
Chris and Kate: Jesus has legs, therefore ablative absolute.
Zach: Cherchez...la Cher?
Prof: The subjunctive is like pregnancy, you're either in it or you're not.
-Me: I think you think I'm kidding about the death in this room.
-Sarah: Kill me first!
Prof: Here, have some flight, it will be good for you.
Phil: And God said, "Let them be seized."