notes to animals
Dear Baldur,
It is wonderful -- nay, astonishing -- that you chose to get some exercise last night. If cats could sweat you probably would have worked one up. That's great for an elderly tubby tabby. So I really hesitate to say anything, but... that squeak-toy was not provided by any of the household humans, and you know how I feel about ambulatory toys, especially on the similarly-colored carpet where I might not see their remains. I'm sorry I took it away from you while it was still moving, but you know the rules. Yeah yeah, cycle of life and all that, but not where I'm going to have to deal with it, ok?
Dear squeak-toy,
I hope you made it. If you did, please warn all your murine friends that the cats who reside here are either too stupid or too self-centered to kill you quickly, and they are also too well-fed to eat you afterward, so your death would be in vain. We'll all be happier if you try another house. I nominate the guy up the block who never shovels his sidewalks; he's got a karma deficit.
It is wonderful -- nay, astonishing -- that you chose to get some exercise last night. If cats could sweat you probably would have worked one up. That's great for an elderly tubby tabby. So I really hesitate to say anything, but... that squeak-toy was not provided by any of the household humans, and you know how I feel about ambulatory toys, especially on the similarly-colored carpet where I might not see their remains. I'm sorry I took it away from you while it was still moving, but you know the rules. Yeah yeah, cycle of life and all that, but not where I'm going to have to deal with it, ok?
Dear squeak-toy,
I hope you made it. If you did, please warn all your murine friends that the cats who reside here are either too stupid or too self-centered to kill you quickly, and they are also too well-fed to eat you afterward, so your death would be in vain. We'll all be happier if you try another house. I nominate the guy up the block who never shovels his sidewalks; he's got a karma deficit.