Verboten 1.1
This is Sascha Verboten blah blah blah she's beautiful she's wonderful she's great she's THE EXACT SAME AS ALL OF THE OTHER FC3 SIMS. Scorpio fortune sim.
She angsts about it, sometimes, I'm sure.
At any rate, this is her Uglacy. With an EXTREME poverty challenge. Also, an I'm Surrounded By Idiots. (THIS IS THE MOST HARDCORE LEGACY, OKAY?)
Also, no one gets a Real Job in it. They are for LOSERS. You throw that newspaper AWAY, Sascha.
Sascha: Whatever. Another tree died for this, and we're one step closer to our species' eventual demise.
ATTAGIRL.
Dude: So! Let me tell you about The Arts.
Sascha: If it ain't black, and it ain't drippin' blood, I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT.
Feel that excitement.
This dude is crazy. He just started talking to himself about how much he hates Sascha.
I should either kill him, or marry him into the legacy. Probably the latter- this is an uglacy! Look at that beautiful(?) face!
Her thought bubble says no, but her eyes say yes!
See?! That dude knows it.
I think these guys need to stop focusing on how she just wet herself, and start focusing at how perfectly she is en pointe. Dang! She should be a ballerina.
Sascha: Huh. You know, that Sharpie eyeliner really works on me.
Sascha spent most of her night raging at the flamingo. It is not the flamingo's fault you don't have food, Sascha! Okay?! (It is my fault. Me.)
So, I changed my mind about that Real Job thing. It was getting boring, okay?!
Sascha: Heeeey, I dig a man in an Optimus Prime suit.
(My drivers wear Optimus Prime suits. Why don't yours?)
I HATE EVERYTHING.
Sascha: So do Iiiii...
Sascha: *dies*
WHAT. THIS IS DAY TWO. WHAT.
OKAY I'M RELOADING.
Let's try this again. Meet Sascha. ~Hello for the first time ever, Sascha!~
Sascha: I wish I were dead.
NO YOU DON'T.
Here are her lovely belongings. Surely, thanks to this piece-of-junk chair, she will live through her first two days, right?
See?! She's so jazzed about owning it! It will be her guiding light!
Look, look! She's got a great party going on. With butterflies and friends all over the place.
And NO CLOWNS.
And she's even found love in her new, butterfly-shaped heart (that is located closer to her stomach).
They don't seem to like being in love. He started sneering for no reason, and she is complaining her face off.
They are not good at this.
Guy: *angry thumbs up*
Sascha: I am intrigued by this angst!
Did you know? Kissing someone makes you more musically inclined. Even if music doesn't play in your head. (THIS MA-HA-GIC MOMENT...)
~The more you know!~
Guy: Eyyy, guys! GUESS WHO JUST KISSED A LADY?! ~me~ (I did)
Sascha: I hate your stupid hotness. Get out of my face.
Everyone: OH MY GOSH FLAMINGO ON FIRE!!!
Redhead: WHERE?!?!?!
I did not know Sims could sleep in living chairs. But they can. I am sure that the flamingo knew.
Oh, he knew.
Sascha: If anyone finds out I use my chair as a toilet, I'll cry forever. Tears of ANGUISH. D:
Look at what Sascha's hard day of work bought her? A wall! (One whole wall!) With a PHONE ON IT!
She must feel so rewarded.
Well, FINE. DON'T feel rewarded, then. I try so hard to make you happy. :(
Oh, no! Is... is she going to die again?! D:
OH HECK!!!!
(just kidding she passed out)
Pong (Guy): Tee hee! It's so funny when she falls unconcious!
Sascha: RAGE AND FURY EMBALM MY SOULLLL.
Sascha: raaaage?
Pong: grossssss!
Pong: I'm out! Worst date ever! I'm going home and peeing in my shower LIKE A HUMAN BEING.
Sascha: NOOOOOOOOOOO
Sascha: I /CANNOT/ live without my life! I /CANNOT/ live without my soul! OH CATHERINE PONG!
(wuthering heightsssss WUTHERING HEIIIIIIGHTS
AGAIN. SASDFAADSFAS WHY. CAN'T. SHE. LIVE.
Oh, look! She is magically back at the point where she just lost her job. How does she do it?! Magical rebirth!
Sascha: The depths of my sorrow know no ends!
Flamingo: I'm so sorry! ;__;
And then she cried herself to sleep. (It is so sad. If you need to stop here to get some tissue with which to dry your many tears, I will excuse you.)
The aliens were not watching you pee behind your chair, Sascha. You can relax.
Sascha: Oh, Flamingo. I just don't know how we're going to make it.
Flamingo: I believe in you, Sascha! :D
Sascha: Oh, /do/ you? We have /ways/ of testing your loyalty...
Flamingo: D:
Sascha: Social Bunny, let's get ONE THING straight. I WILL HAVE MY EGGS SUNNY SIDE UP. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME BECAUSE I WILL NOT HAVE A LAZY ROTTEN BUNNY LOUNGING AROUND /MY/ /CHAIR/.
Sascha: Come on, man. It isn't like this stuff is going to do itself.
Social Bunny: Escaaaaape~
Well, maybe Sascha can con her date into making her those eggs. He seems to be a malleable sort.
Sascha passes out. A lot. If I'm supposed to be keeping track of how much she passes out for points, uh... I'll just say she's passed out -100 times and leave it at that.
(Playing for points! I'm off to a great start!)
M.C. Stinky is in the haaaaaaause! (Her first album got two thumbs up! She's goin' places.)
Ooh, Pong is ~so smooth~. Surely, no one will see him sneaking in to that clothing booth!
Oh, I guess someone did.
Clerk: My eyes can never unsee... o_o
I finally realized that-- hey. If I was sending Sascha to community lots, why didn't I just make her use the bathroom there?
...and then I felt really silly and like I killed her the other two times.
Uh, sorry! :D
I also had her freestyle for tips like a madman. Hooray! I can play Sims REEL gud now!
Even though people only tipped her, like, five bucks.
(Then again, that increased her cash on hand by a good 10%!)
Sure, she's passed out on her lawn, but look at how minty green that plumbbob is! Oh, she's living the high life, I assure you.
By the way, she got a new job. Do you see how high this life is? (Higher than a drug-addled kite.)
Passed-out time is hugs time~!
Sascha: WHY DOESN'T ANYONE CAAARE?! WHY ARE THE HUGS GONE WHEN I'M THEREEE?!
Whoa-oh! Sascha is crying! You know what that means?
Crying time is tickle time~!
But it's okay, because really he LOVES HER, so all of those mean things he said and did don't matter because he LOVES HER. Hooray!
Sascha: I smell bad, and SOMEONE'S GOING TO PAY DEARLY FOR IT.
Mailman: Can it be me? I dig it, babeee! ;D
DOMESTIC ABUUUUUSE
I'd like to say she's crying because of the events of the night before, but really, it's just because she still isn't clean.
Oh, look! It looks like Sascha's going to die again! Cool, cool.
But it's okay, because now she has ~FURNITURE~. Check it out. Refrigerator AND lame mattress someone threw out that is probably infested with bedbugs bed! Awesome.
OH NO HE HAS A GUN
Mailman: I brought you this glowing stick because it is made out of my love and because I love you I love you I love you YOU ROCK AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME!
Sascha: zzz... awesome... zzz... yes...
Aw yeah. Eating FOOD. In PAJAMAS. You can tell she's not going to die, now. It's a beautiful thing.
So, I had her invite the mailman to move in! His name is Sinjin. And he brought CASH MONEYZ YEAH. *rock out*
Sascha: My lover has brought me cold hard cash! :D
Sinjin: *NEGATIVITY ABOUT SASCHA'S BUTTOCKS*
(thank you lazyoceans~)
Look at that hotness! SHOWER. TOILET. ~*WALLS.*~
I don't think I can handle it.
Sascha: I do say, Sinjin! I believe foul games are afoot!
Sinjin: Well, this ought to be a right bit of fun!
Walkby: Mmmyeeeeeeeeeees.
That walkby is dothesmustle's selfsim. WHAT IS SHE UP TO? (Answer: trouble.) Oh, that dastardly fiend.
Protip: wearing your leopard-print undies in the snow does not make you a snow leopard.
Stalking and hunting a lawn flamingo does not make you a snow leopard, either.
He spent most of the evening kicking the flamingo over, and setting it back up. It just bugged him, okay? YOU WOULD DO IT, TOO.
THAT WILL NOT GET YOU CHICKS, SINJIN.
Being surrounded by idiots is going to be fun!
Notes: I mentioned it's going to be an uglacy, and as you may have noticed, Sinjin is far from ugly. In the neighborhood the Verbotens live in, all of the NPCs were generated using default replacement templates, and townies were made from Maxis templates.
The poverty challenge rules say you can't move in a townie- only NPCs- and I didn't want Sascha to be a single mom, so... well, Sinjin it is. The ugly will surely come in a few generations-- the Poverty part of the challenge only lasts until Gen 3 dies, anyway.