The me that's never satisfied
I found the mall in Ann Arbor and I'm not a fan of it. There are some good stores and I almost bought a Gryffindor tie at Hot Topic and some Lands End jeans at Sears but didn't. I ended up buying a late lunch at Chipotle and a cinnabon and having a great desire to cry. I've never liked shopping for clothes but its got worse lately. I'm not happy with how my body is and keep having awful self doubt about everything that it sneaks in and makes me want to curl up and hide from the world. I know that this won't last long and that I can do amazing things as I have done them before, but today's hard.
Also I had the fun of getting lost going out of the mall, as happens so often in Ann Arbor, I turned the wrong way and had to search for someplace to turn around. Normally I'd enjoy this more but it was rush hour so it ended up being stressful.
Oh and my good friend who's looking for the same sort of job has two interviews. I wish her well but that just scares me more and then I feel terribly guilty for feeling less than her and all those things. I hate self-doubt.
Thus you get two memes from me, another round of answers to questions and a fic prompt.
The prompt's a variation on what's on sardonicynic's journal.
Give me a fandom, character, pairing from any fandom you know I follow as always ask and I'll try then give me a prompt, a word, a kink, a line of something and I'll write at least 100 words for you.
-Comment on this entry asking for questions
-Post your answers and this meme
-Rinse and repeat for fun and profit
This round the questions are from one_more_cherry
1: Favorite pup to play.
The answer to this question changes depending on the mood I'm in as they all are my favorites at some point or else I wouldn't play them.
2: What inspired you to pick up each of your pups?
This isn't in exactly chronological order but close to it, after a certain point, I forget who was when.
Will was the first character I ever wrote fanfic about when I first read Paul Creswick's Robin Hood in elementary school. When I began telling stories at a summer camp, the first long story I told was Will's hanging. So when I was talking with Danii about who I should app to Milliways, Will came up and it was that moment of aha, perfect.
Demeter happened because ashen_key was playing Persephone and we started talking about their story and suddenly I had a Demeter voice.
The Pirate King came from a cracky conversation in crackchat where we were talking about Gilbert and Sullivan and I found youtube clips and apped him.
Tumnus has always been my favorite Narnia character and I loved watching the Narnian pups in Bar. At some point I realized he was actually free and apped him. He was the first one I actually took all the way through a canon.
Tiwa is all the things I love and miss about New Zealand and the character that's the closest to me. I sometimes feel rather like a bird and when she's happy, she barely touches the ground, but when she's sad, she just wants to hide.
Jane was someone I thought about playing from the time I saw the movie but she intimidated me. My wonderful partner in crime, dynastessa who played Tom Lefroy for a time convinced me that yes, I could play Jane and so I did.
Sameth is all saphyria's fault because due to her Yrael, I read The Abhorsen Chronicles and found Sameth fascinating. In this family of fighters and magical warriors, he's a creator. Also I felt that canon didn't give hm as much of a voice and I wanted to fix that.
Moist von Lipwig happened because I had the hardback of Going Postal and was thinking that I should give it away as I hadn't read it since it came out. I sat down to reread it, went through it about three days and realized, right, I'm apping Moist.
Edit as I completely forgot William, sorry about that, its been a long and odd day.
I first watched 3:10 to Yuma due to sardonicynic and moofoot's amazing cowboys and knew I could play William, I'd also read the short story when I lived in New Zealand. When I was younger I had a complete cowboy phase mainly due to The Young Riders. I also decided he was too much like my other pups and moved on. Last Fourth of July wasn't a great time for me but I rewatched Yuma and tossed William into Mixed Muses. He stuck and I apped him the next month or possibly that same month.
3: Favorite Color?
Deep blues and greens
4: Favorite Bloom County Character?
Opus, always Opus because I want to hug him and somewhere I have an Opus plush that either I or my mother found at a yard sale.
5: Favorite sport?
This is really tricky for me since I love watching sports and I'm a great spectator so its hard to pick just one. In terms of what when I do it, I feel happier, horseback riding or dancing though I know they don't always quite count as sports. Those two things are activities that while I'll feel awkward and sore as I get back into them, they remind me that I do know how my body works.
In terms of watching sports, I love American football due to four years in the marching band and that rush of sitting in the stands in the hot or the cold. As a professional game to watch, rugby by a mile, I was able to see a few games in New Zealand, in the stadium and in sports bars and its the closest I've felt to that camaraderie of high school sports.
Also I had the fun of getting lost going out of the mall, as happens so often in Ann Arbor, I turned the wrong way and had to search for someplace to turn around. Normally I'd enjoy this more but it was rush hour so it ended up being stressful.
Oh and my good friend who's looking for the same sort of job has two interviews. I wish her well but that just scares me more and then I feel terribly guilty for feeling less than her and all those things. I hate self-doubt.
Thus you get two memes from me, another round of answers to questions and a fic prompt.
The prompt's a variation on what's on sardonicynic's journal.
Give me a fandom, character, pairing from any fandom you know I follow as always ask and I'll try then give me a prompt, a word, a kink, a line of something and I'll write at least 100 words for you.
-Comment on this entry asking for questions
-Post your answers and this meme
-Rinse and repeat for fun and profit
This round the questions are from one_more_cherry
1: Favorite pup to play.
The answer to this question changes depending on the mood I'm in as they all are my favorites at some point or else I wouldn't play them.
2: What inspired you to pick up each of your pups?
This isn't in exactly chronological order but close to it, after a certain point, I forget who was when.
Will was the first character I ever wrote fanfic about when I first read Paul Creswick's Robin Hood in elementary school. When I began telling stories at a summer camp, the first long story I told was Will's hanging. So when I was talking with Danii about who I should app to Milliways, Will came up and it was that moment of aha, perfect.
Demeter happened because ashen_key was playing Persephone and we started talking about their story and suddenly I had a Demeter voice.
The Pirate King came from a cracky conversation in crackchat where we were talking about Gilbert and Sullivan and I found youtube clips and apped him.
Tumnus has always been my favorite Narnia character and I loved watching the Narnian pups in Bar. At some point I realized he was actually free and apped him. He was the first one I actually took all the way through a canon.
Tiwa is all the things I love and miss about New Zealand and the character that's the closest to me. I sometimes feel rather like a bird and when she's happy, she barely touches the ground, but when she's sad, she just wants to hide.
Jane was someone I thought about playing from the time I saw the movie but she intimidated me. My wonderful partner in crime, dynastessa who played Tom Lefroy for a time convinced me that yes, I could play Jane and so I did.
Sameth is all saphyria's fault because due to her Yrael, I read The Abhorsen Chronicles and found Sameth fascinating. In this family of fighters and magical warriors, he's a creator. Also I felt that canon didn't give hm as much of a voice and I wanted to fix that.
Moist von Lipwig happened because I had the hardback of Going Postal and was thinking that I should give it away as I hadn't read it since it came out. I sat down to reread it, went through it about three days and realized, right, I'm apping Moist.
Edit as I completely forgot William, sorry about that, its been a long and odd day.
I first watched 3:10 to Yuma due to sardonicynic and moofoot's amazing cowboys and knew I could play William, I'd also read the short story when I lived in New Zealand. When I was younger I had a complete cowboy phase mainly due to The Young Riders. I also decided he was too much like my other pups and moved on. Last Fourth of July wasn't a great time for me but I rewatched Yuma and tossed William into Mixed Muses. He stuck and I apped him the next month or possibly that same month.
3: Favorite Color?
Deep blues and greens
4: Favorite Bloom County Character?
Opus, always Opus because I want to hug him and somewhere I have an Opus plush that either I or my mother found at a yard sale.
5: Favorite sport?
This is really tricky for me since I love watching sports and I'm a great spectator so its hard to pick just one. In terms of what when I do it, I feel happier, horseback riding or dancing though I know they don't always quite count as sports. Those two things are activities that while I'll feel awkward and sore as I get back into them, they remind me that I do know how my body works.
In terms of watching sports, I love American football due to four years in the marching band and that rush of sitting in the stands in the hot or the cold. As a professional game to watch, rugby by a mile, I was able to see a few games in New Zealand, in the stadium and in sports bars and its the closest I've felt to that camaraderie of high school sports.