a little more of the fic of doom.

Feb 11, 2012 14:56

I actually got some writing time in today! Here's a little bit: 4000ish words. Kate is courtesy of
technosage, blame me for Will and the little dude.



*****

They've promised Magnus a picnic. Will's arranged it with Biggie--a big basket with kid-friendly finger food and all the 'stuff' to go along with it. He's stupidly excited about this, so he's grinning when he says to Magnus, "So, kiddo, remember when I said we were going on a picnic? Well, it's picnic time."

Magnus doesn't look quite as excited about this as Will feels, and Will thinks maybe it's because he's being maybe a little too enthusiastic about it. "Can Bear come?" he asks uncertainly. Bear seems to be the name he's given his teddy bear, and Will would comment on the lack of originality except that he remembers that once upon a time he gave his own stuffed animals names like Brown Dog, Blue Horse, and Black Cat. Super creative stuff.

Kate kneels down to Magnus's level. "Bear can come," she says, grinning. "But you're in charge. You have to make sure Bear doesn't get in the picnic basket. Bears love picnic foods. You're not going to let him eat Daddy's lunch, right?"

"Bear can share my food," Magnus says, giggling. "He doesn't eat much."

Will watches Kate with him and thinks, she's good. really good, and he hopes like hell she'll be able to keep doing it, keep being with him like this; it's clear Magnus thinks she's the greatest thing ever and he knows that look of Kate's, the one where she grins and it's like she's in love with this kid, because he feels that himself every time he looks at Magnus. "Well, you just keep your eye on him," he says. "Those bears are tricky little guys. Okay, let's go pick up the basket, I bet Biggie's got it ready, and then we can go pick a good spot."

"I hope he doesn't weigh much, either." Kate scoops Magnus up and holds him tight for a minute. "Oof," she says softly, and her face is hidden for a moment. "You guys are heavy."

"Dr. Helen says I'm growing!" Magnus says proudly, wrapping his arms around Kate and holding on tightly to her and the bear. He doesn't seem to notice the quietness of her voice, but Will does, and he tries to give her a little space on the walk to the kitchen.

"I think you're bigger than yesterday," Kate says, her voice sounding a little more normal as she puts a playful groan in there. "You definitely weigh more."

Magnus laughs and presses his face against Kate, holding on tight. Will loves the sound of Magnus's happy, high-pitched little-boy giggles, ones that last through picking up the basket and heading down to the main level to the front doors--he could listen to him all day. He'd give his left hand to make sure this kid always has a reason to laugh and be happy like this, if he could.

But the giggles don't last long. The closer they get to the front doors, the more quiet and still Magnus gets, and the tighter he holds on to Kate and Bear.

Kate kisses Magnus's curls and looks over his head go to give Will a smile that's almost reassuring. And he can tell she's picking up on the same thing that Will is, that Magnus is getting quieter and more clingy as they go. "Hey," she murmurs to Magnus. "Listen. You're a big guy now. So we need some big guy rules. What do you say?" She gives Will a look like back me up, here.

It's only been a couple of days but he's more and more impressed as they go with the way that Kate is stepping up to this, the way she seems to know how to get to Magnus when Will doesn't have a clue. He doesn't know where Kate's going with this, but he's sure it has something to do with the way that Magnus is clinging to her like an octopus and fidgeting, looking worriedly at the door--is he scared of running into the pale Hollow Earth people again? Or is he scared of going outside? Will can't tell. He catches Kate's eye and chimes in, "Big guy rules. How about it?"

"'kay," Magnus says, very small, very quiet, his face pressed against Kate's shoulder.

Kate stops walking and rubs Magnus's back lightly, comfortingly. "I'm kinda rusty on the whole rules thing," she admits. "I actually only remember one right now and I totally hate it, but it's a good rule. It's Daddy's rule. He made it for me a long time ago, and he has to keep it too. When something's wrong or scary, big guys have to tell someone what it is. Think you're up to it?

Will stops in his tracks and nearly drops the picnic basket in surprise--what the hell is that and where did it come from? he wonders--and then realizes it doesn't matter, because if it gets Magnus talking to them, it's a good thing. Though he decides he's totally going to hold Kate to it herself, one day. He waits to see if Magnus is going to respond to that or if he'll have to do a little verbal prodding to get him to tell them what's scaring him.

Magnus squirms uncomfortably, holding tightly to both Kate and Bear. "Okay."

Will waits another beat or two, and when he doesn't reply, Will puts down the basket and rubs Magnus's back a little. "C'mon, kiddo," he says gently. "Tell us what's making you scared."

"Are we going outside?" Magnus asks. He's sniffling a little, though he's not crying. "You said we can't go outside, ever. That's where they are."

"We'd never take you where you weren't safe," Kate says. "You know that." She kisses Magnus's hair and gives Will a look like your turn, doc.

There's a bench in the entranceway and he nods Kate toward it so they can sit down--this might take a little bit, depending on how Magnus reacts. "Hey. She's totally right," he says, touching Magnus's cheek. "And remember the other day, when those guys scared you because you thought they were the bad guys?" Magnus nods, but he doesn't say anything, so Will keeps talking. "And remember how I told you those bad guys aren't here? They're so, so, so far away they might as well be in outer space somewhere? They can't get you. It's great to go outside. And it's safe. You know, I went outside yesterday while you were hanging out with your Mom and look, I'm okay, right?"

Magnus turns his head a little so he can look at Will, staring a little bit like he's not really sure he believes the part where Will went outside. "Uh huh," he says, still holding tightly to Kate, who's still giving him plenty of physical reassurance while Will talks.

"And you want to know something cool?" WIll continues. "This place? All of it, the inside and the outside? It's a secret. Only people who are friends with me and your mom or Dr. Helen even know about it. You have to have special permission just to get in. It's the safest place there is in the whole world. If it wasn't safe, we wouldn't take you there. It'll be good, I promise. You'll love it." Granted, the Sanctuary apparently hadn't been safe from the palefaces in that other world, but this was different. Different choices had been made, different paths taken, and this Sanctuary apparently hadn't even existed in that other world Helen saw.

"You know what?" This time, Kate doesn't look to Will in a back me up way or a your turn, doc way before she speaks--she just says it. "Mommy's going to teach you how to run and how to hide and how to protect yourself, too. Because you're big now. And you should know how to do that. Okay? What do you think?"

Will's first instinct is to think what? no, he doesn't need that, but then he thinks that the more secure Magnus feels, the more like he feels like he has options to protect himself other than just waiting for something to happen or someone to take care of him when he's scared, the less scared he'll be. Maybe it's silly to think about a four year old being 'empowered', but that's what it is, really. Even if he never needs it, it's good for him to know. And Will finds he's admiring Kate a little for thinking of it.

Magnus scrunches up his little face in concentration, and then nods. "Okay. I want to."

"I think that's a smart decision, kiddo," Will says, ruffling Magnus's hair. "Really smart."

"Good," Kate says happily. She kisses Magnus's hair and there's a second where her mouth accidentally brushes Will's fingers, but she doesn't flinch or stiffen like she does most of the other times they touch. "So, we good? Ready to go see some grass and trees and take off your shoes?"

Magnus nods, a little hesitantly, then climbs down off her lap. He grabs tight to her hand, Bear tucked into his other arm; clearly, he wants to walk out, but he's still anxious and holding very tight to Kate's hand. "Okay," he says. "We can go."

Will retrieves the picnic basket; it's unwieldy enough to take both hands so he doesn't have one free for Magnus even if Magnus wasn't holding his bear, but he walks very close to him, on the other side from Kate. When they get to the door, he backs into it, pushing it open and holding it for Kate and Magnus to come through. Right outside the door are a few wide steps and a smooth stone landing, but just after the landing the grass is a deep, soft green, spreading into a wide lawn that stretches between the main building and the other large building; there's a paved path that starts at the waterfall, winds through the lawn and continues through trees and over a stream on out into the caves and to the surface, and up overhead is a vast expanse of glass shaped into a large geodesic dome, letting in plenty of light.

Warily, Magnus sticks his head out the door. He doesn't go further than Will, but takes in everything with wide, round eyes.

Kate squeezes Magnus's hand and steps out past Will and Magnus then waits on the top step. "C'mere, baby," she says encouragingly. "You're gonna like it. Grass and dirt feels great under your toes. Kind of cool and --" She wrinkles her nose and her toes wiggle in her boots."-- squishy."

Up overhead one of the Hollow-Earth-style transport pods zips by with a quiet hum; Will smiles as it catches Magnus's attention and he looks amazed, then looks at Kate again as she's encouraging him to come over. "Go ahead, kiddo," Will says. "I'm right behind you."

Magnus looks around at everything, taking it all in, then runs straight for Kate. It's a lot to take in at once and he takes a minute to press his face against Kate's leg, then peeks around her again to look down towards the clump of trees near the pond and points. "Trees! Can we go there?"

Kate laughs and ruffles his hair. "You bet, baby. C'mon, I'll race ya!"

It takes Magnus a second to figure out what she means by 'race ya', but when he does he takes off after her, little legs running as fast as they can. Bear's still wedged under his arm and his stuffed arms and legs flop up and down with the movement as Magnus runs. It's almost comical, and Will grins as he follows along behind them with the basket.

He's not running, but since Magnus can't really run that fast it doesn't take Will but a minute to catch up with them. Kate's sprinted ahead in a short burst, but she circles back and grabs Magnus around the waist, laughing. Will just stands there, watching them; she swings Magnus up and kisses him, completely unselfconsious, holding nothing back from this little boy who loves her, and then she smiles at him--atWill--with the biggest, most brilliant smile he's ever seen from her, and something warm and heavy tightens in his chest that doesn't take him but a second to recognize for what it is--he's falling in love with her. He also knows this is crazy and probably not all that healthy and it's unfair to everyone involved, but to see her like that, giving their son--it's how he thinks of Magnus now, as his son, their son--her unrestrained affection, he can't help it.

The best he can do is try not to let it get out of hand.

"Let's get those shoes off, huh?" Kate says to Magnus. Will puts the picnic basket down in the shade and pulls off his shoes, then goes over to them to help Magnus get his little shoes off.

Clearly happy with all the attention he's getting from Kate, Magnus seems to have let go of his anxiety about being outside, at least for the moment. He wriggles his feet out of his shoes and socks with their help and makes a face of surprise when his feet touch the cool grass. He toddles around in it for a second, then puts Bear carefully on the grass so he can bend down and touch the ground with both hands. The sensation of the soft green blades against his hands makes him giggle, and then he flops down in the grass like another child might lay down in the snow and make snow angels. Kate takes off her boots and her socks and then rolls over into the grass onto her back to lift Magnus up over her; he shrieks and laughs with delight. "Outside's pretty cool, huh?" she says.

"It is, Mommy!" Eventually he squirms down out of Kate's grasp but he doesn't go far; he runs around in circles around her, jumping over her legs, and generally climbing all over her like a small, energetic puppy.

Will can't deal with it. It's hard for him to realize why, but he does; he's always longed for a family, for that feeling that only comes from knowing there's a bond with another person that can't be shaken, and this, right here with Kate and Magnus in this moment, is like giving him exactly what he's always wanted on a silver platter--except it's not really that neat or easy. He takes a minute, while Magnus is occupied with Kate, to look away, take a breath, pull in his feelings as best he can, then he scoots nearer to them, watching Magnus, who is still climbing over Kate. Magnus seizes the opportunity to climb on Will, too, a little bundle of energy who will crash hard later but for the moment is all-out playing, running the few steps back and forth between Will and Kate like this is the most exciting thing in the world.

Kate swipes the bear and puts him on top of the picnic basket. "Rrrr-arr-rrr!" She growls at Magnus playfully and wrestles him down into the space between them. "Better stop Bear or he's going to eat all the food!" Will reaches over and tickles Magnus, making him squeal with laughter, then leans over and snags Bear, manipulating him like a little puppet, opening the picnic basket and sticking first one fluffy arm inside and then the other as he makes growly-hungry bear sounds and leans Bear further in the basket so his head's in there too. "Magnus!" he calls, pretending to have no success dragging Bear out of the basket and desperately needing help. "Bear's in the basket! He's eating your cookies! You better come get him!"

"Hey! Don't eat my cookies!" Magnus squirms away from Will and Kate towards the basket, pulling Bear from it and cuddling close and giggling. "Silly Bear. You can't have the cookies yet." He crawls back to Kate and makes Bear give her 'kisses', then does the same to Will, and after he's satisified that the appropriate amount of kisses have been dispensed he falls between them on his back, looking up at the 'sky' above and sighing contentedly.

Will ruffles his son's hair. "Good job saving the picnic, kiddo."

Kate smoothes down the mess Will's just made of Magnus's hair. "Hey, matchstick," she teases. "He's too young for product." She leans down and kisses Magnus's nose and comes up again. "Great job." She's looking at Will when she adds, "My hero," and it's almost flirty, which makes Will feel like something's skipped a beat and is free-falling inside him. Maybe Kate feels it too, because she ducks her head, looking at Magnus again, and says, "Your first retrieval went a lot smoother than Mommy's."

This kind of thing, this silliness and playfulness and happiness, it's something that reaches his deep need for family and belonging in a way that nothing else has, despite the guilt, and he can't help but wonder if he's getting too deep into the things he's always wanted, letting that run away with him these last few days while telling himself he's doing all this for Magnus. He has to be careful. Instead of flirting back or playing, like his instinct is to do, he just ruffles Magnus's hair again, undoing Kate's work.

Magnus frowns a little. "What's a retr--ret--retweval?" he asks, stumbling over the word a little, his slight lisp getting in the way,

Thankfully, Kate answers this one. "You know Biggie and Sally and all of our friends who don't look like us?" she says, and Magnus nods. "Well, sometimes... um...sometimes it's hard for them to get food or find a place to live or be safe. A retrieval is when me or Daddy goes to get them and help them and bring them here. So they can be safe. Here. Like you are."

Magnus is clearly impressed by this, because he looks at Kate and Will like they're superheroes, a look that makes Will feel like he's about ten feet tall. "Ohhhh."

But Will feels like he needs to clarify a little more, so he adds carefully to what Kate's explained. "Sometimes there might be people who aren't very nice to our friends, kind of like bullies." Not very nice is an understatement, but he's trying to put it in ways that Magnus can understand without scaring the crap out of him. "Because they don't understand them, or because people are just scared of people that are different than they are, but whatever the reason is, our job is to make sure our friends are safe. Your mom's really good at that. At protecting people and keeping them safe. And then sometimes after they get here, they want to talk about things that scare them, or talk about their problems, or they want help making friends, so they come talk to me, and that's what I do. And Henry, he likes to make and build things. He's good at computers and machines, and building things, and solving problems, making sure everything works. The Big Guy, he's good at protecting people, like your mom is, and he's a really good cook, and he kind of looks out for us while we're busy looking after everyone else. Dr. Helen is good at taking care of our friends when they get sick and she studies and researches a lot about how to keep our friends healthy, and makes sure everything runs smoothly." He's deliberately left out Tesla because he's not totally sure what the guy's still doing here other than harassing Henry every day and flirting with Helen, which, honestly, is not something Will really wants to think about. "So, we all have jobs to do to keep this place going."

"I want a job!" Magnus says eagerly.

Will laughs. "Your job is keeping the bears out of the cookies," he says. "And I gotta say, kiddo, you're pretty good at it so far."

"Your other job is to eat and get big," Kate says, "and get to know all our friends here so you can help Daddy help them make friends and help me keep you and Daddy and all our friends safe."

"Okay, Mommy. I can do that! I want to help." Magnus is so excited, so eager to please, and right now Will's having a hard time imagining ever telling him no about anything. He's sure it'll happen at some point, but right now, he can't come up with a scenario where he'd have to say it.

"Good deal," Will says. "Now, speaking of eating..." He gives Magnus's tummy a little poke, and then Bear's. "I think it's time for dinner. You want to help me unpack this basket and see what Biggie put in there for us to eat?"

Magnus agrees immediately--it's part of that eager-to-please thing he has going on, and after giving Bear to Kate to hold he helps Will unpack the picnic and set up. It's all easy-to-eat, kid-friendly finger food, and while Will might feel a little silly eating sandwiches and fruit cut into shapes, Magnus thinks it's amazing. He also thinks that chocolate milk is amazing (that's another first for him) and after he's gobbled down everything in sight, he curls up in Kate's lap with a cookie, some more milk, and his bear. He finishes his cookie and rubs his eyes like he's tired, but he's fighting sleep as hard as he can. Will thinks, between the day's excitement and a full stomach, it's a losing battle.

Kate stretches out on the picnic blanket, curling protectively around Magnus as he cuddles against her. Will finishes packing up the last of the picnic stuff and then joins them, propping on his elbow on the other side of Magnus. That feeling of home and family and closeness is so strong again--how in the hell did he get these feelings for this kid so fast?--and when he meets Kate's eyes, her soft look tells him she's feeling it too. "Did you have a good time today, kiddo?" he asks softly.

Magnus nods sleepily and curls close to Kate. "It's okay to sleep, baby," Kate says. "We're not going anywhere. Are we, Will?"

Whether Kate means that 'we' deliberately or not, Will hears it loud and clear. He watches as Magnus closes his eyes and moves his hand like he's about to put his thumb in his mouth, but it never quite makes it there before he's falling asleep. "Nope," he says softly. "We're not going anywhere."

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fic: sanctuary, tv: sanctuary

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