4.08, Fugue
Okay, now that I am finally home for the night, I can try to pull my thoughts together about this episode. It was such a punch in the gut in the best possible way. I don't even know if I can explain it.
What I didn't like: Nothing. Even though this is not quite going in my top favorite episodes (Veritas, Next Tuesday, Requiem, Carentan, Metamorphosis, Eulogy) it is an episode I can't really fault. There are no moments where I just went, "this sucks and it doesn't belong". Even if I didn't like where something went, it still made sense for the character (like Will telling Abby she's "the one") and I couldn't fight it.
What I did like: Oh, God, everything. I can't list everything but I will try to hit the highlights.
* Magnus and Will's scene here, the one in my icon. It's the one where they are holding hands, the one where Magnus tells Will he needs to try to keep Abby grounded in this reality. If I'm not supposed to ship them, then I'm sorry, because when they have conversations like this, where they are touching and they're earnest and it's so emotional and quiet, I honestly can't help it. This was such a tender scene between them and perfect as a contrast to their subsequent scenes with anger and high emotion. I also love how Will communicates that he knows what it's like to be turned into something else and he doesn't want that to happen to Abby. I can't remember if he talked about this in Warriors, but at the end of Metamorphosis, he had another quietly emotional moment with her where he told her how much that scared/affected him, and you know that's what he's thinking of here. He doesn't want to lose Abby, no, but he also doesn't want her to have to experience that. And as far as I know, it's the one thing Helen hasn't done--turn into something else.
* Magnus discovering Abby can only communicate through singing, and her and Abby's first duet. I'm going to say a note here about the singing: I am a weird kind of music snob who does not listen to most popular music because it grates (I'm a mild sound-color synasthete and most popular music is too jarring to me) but I firmly believe that music, especially singing, is for everyone. I love how the music in this episode was so organic to the situation: this abnormal can only communicate through music, so other characters have to sing to her. The music wasn't there to show off how awesome the singers are, it was just a tool in the story like a computer or a drug or a guest star. I think the composer did a beautiful job writing parts to fit each actor's strengths and limitations. Pascale got lots of good material because she's a trained singer and has the chops for it (wow, did she ever). Amanda and Robin got less because they aren't. They didn't do a bad job with what they had, though I'd prefer a little less country twang in Robin's voice, and they were successful with it because it was simple enough for a non-singer. I point this out for the girls on Tumblr whining that Amanda didn't have enough singing. She did good with what she had but I don't think she could have pulled off more than that. Robin was much better when he was singing with Pascale than when he was singing alone. Anyway, this scene was really good and I like how it set up Will's reluctance to sing because:
* The scene with Will and Abby when he talks to her, while she's asleep, about his mom. PUNCH. IN. THE. GUT. I love, love, love that he doesn't want to sing because singing brings back painful memories of his mother singing to him whenever he was hurt or scared. I teared up. I really, really teared up. Will should talk about his mother more. Maybe not, because it would lose its impact, but I do love it so much.
* Abby and Will's duet on the roof. Okay, if you know me at all you know I really hate this ship. I don't buy it, I don't feel it, and I don't ship it at all.
But this duet sold me on it. I don't ship it, and it's not what I want, but it does make more sense now and I didn't hate the Will/Abby moments and wish they were over. They got more development in that two minutes of song than they have in their whole relationship so far. Part of my like for this is that Abby had zero of the qualities that annoyed me in earlier episodes and Pascale's singing was amazing. The other thing was Will's feelings were communicated SO WELL in the song: he's been kind of keeping his distance, he really thinks she's it, he knows how she feels because he's been there, and he's scared to death. I don't think it's any coincidence that Abby jumping off the roof is very similar to the scene in Metamorphosis where Will dreams he's jumping off the roof, when he loses both his humanity and his ability to speak (which was terrifying for him and just as terrifying watching it happen to his girlfriend).
* "What is the point of this entire place if we can't save the people that--" Okay, OKAY. God, that was harsh. Magnus's FACE. And I've seen people call Will out for being an asshole here, but I can't, because I CAN'T. He just watched his girlfriend try to kill herself because she is so miserable, and he knows EXACTLY WHY she's miserable because he's experienced it. He's terrified and desperate and this is not a problem he can solve. If he'd just said "okay" and left, I would have been extremely disappointed. The other thing is he has not had the years of dealing with grief and loss that Magnus has. He's still a noob when it comes to that, and I see shit like this as being Will's "toughening up". I am pretty damn sure that Magnus was not as much of a hard-ass when she started out as she is now. That kind of hard-ass only comes from living the life she's led, and Will isn't there yet because he hasn't had the experiences that Magnus has had. it doesn't make him an asshole, it just means he still has stuff to learn. Will's just a year or two younger than me, and he's lost his mother (violently), a girlfriend, a girl who was interested in him, and nearly another girlfriend, all in the space of two-ish years? I haven't gone through that! (I don't work with dangerous creatures either, but anyway.) It doesn't compare to Magnus's losses, but this isn't the Loss Olympics. And Will's personality is different than Magnus's, too, in that he is ALL FEELINGS ALL THE TIME. He wears his heart on his sleeve and has a temper. It doesn't make him an asshole. (how many times does he turn right around and apologize to Magnus before he's hardly finished what he's saying? Not every time, but very often.) But God, you know she's thinking of Ashley and James and Ravi and her dad and a zillion other people, and they both are just breaking my heart here.
but oh ho, apparently Will's just an asshole.
* Daddy Magnus. CRY. It was so lovely.
* The scene where Magnus tells Will what she's going to do to Abby. This scene was so hard, and yet... it was so brilliant, because neither of them were totally right or wrong. I don't think Will really thought Magnus was excited about making some new abnormal. Remember, he's scared shitless for what Abby's going through and she's just tried to kill herself to end it. Magnus was absolutely right to want to do what she could to save Abby, and Will absolutely thought he was acting in Abby's best interest as well. This show would be really fucking boring if Will just said "okay, Magnus, let's do whatever you say" all the time. She was right to lock Will up to keep him from interfering, and Will was right to be pissed about it. It's not neat and clean and pretty and that's why it was so heartbreaking and brilliant.
(um, btw, that was not an annelid. an annelid is a worm and that is not a worm, that's the damn salamander they caught in Firewall.)
* the procedure. Will, Will, Will. And oh, Magnus. Her plan came SO close to killing Abby. When she flatlined and Will crumpled to the floor, I just didn't know what to do. But Magnus absolutely pulled it off and I'm glad. I don't want Abby in the picture but that's not the way I would want it to go, because I don't think Will would ever get over it and it would damage Magnus and Will forever. I'm pretty sure he'd leave the Sanctuary over it. It was bad enough that he showed up just in time to see that thing burst out of Abby. I think Robin's acting in that scene is the best he's done in the series. He didn't say anything except that "just stay", and he didn't need to. It just rips my heart out.
* the scene with him and Abby at the end. I don't ship them, but if I said this scene didn't touch me I'd be lying. The first thing she asks him is "are you okay?" before he can even get a chance to ask about her. And then she hugs him and he just puts his face in her shoulder and she pets his hair and it's so tender I just want to cry. I kind of wish he'd broken up with her after the target talk, but I think it leaves things open for possibilities and I really like it how it is.
* Finally, the last scene with Magnus. It ripped my heart out and stomped on it in the best possible way. I think at this point Will sees himself not exactly as Magnus's equal but close, and I think that he's just kind of lost and bewildered right now because Magnus says she's proud of him and thinks he's doing fine work and could run the Sanctuary, but her actions say something else. Again, I don't think either of them are right or wrong. They just have different ways of doing things and sometimes those ways clash. What got me the most was Will asking her how he's doing, her saying she couldn't be prouder, and he just walks away. Does he walk away because he thinks he's not good enough for Magnus to be proud of (he shakes his head when she says he could run the network), does he not believe her, or does her being proud of him make him think he's headed down a road he doesn't want to go? I DON'T KNOW. AND I LOVE THAT I DON'T KNOW. He just walks away and leaves me whimpering, and leaves Magnus clearly bewildered. It killed me as both a Magnus/Will shipper and someone who is heavily invested in their friendship as the core of this series, and yet I keep watching it over and over and over and over again.
So yeah, I loved it. I can't say it's a favorite, because I don't love it the way I love Carentan and Next Tuesday and Requiem--well, actually, some of the way I love it is similar to Requiem--but it's one I'll watch over and over because it's so complicated.
What I didn't like: Nothing. Even though this is not quite going in my top favorite episodes (Veritas, Next Tuesday, Requiem, Carentan, Metamorphosis, Eulogy) it is an episode I can't really fault. There are no moments where I just went, "this sucks and it doesn't belong". Even if I didn't like where something went, it still made sense for the character (like Will telling Abby she's "the one") and I couldn't fight it.
What I did like: Oh, God, everything. I can't list everything but I will try to hit the highlights.
* Magnus and Will's scene here, the one in my icon. It's the one where they are holding hands, the one where Magnus tells Will he needs to try to keep Abby grounded in this reality. If I'm not supposed to ship them, then I'm sorry, because when they have conversations like this, where they are touching and they're earnest and it's so emotional and quiet, I honestly can't help it. This was such a tender scene between them and perfect as a contrast to their subsequent scenes with anger and high emotion. I also love how Will communicates that he knows what it's like to be turned into something else and he doesn't want that to happen to Abby. I can't remember if he talked about this in Warriors, but at the end of Metamorphosis, he had another quietly emotional moment with her where he told her how much that scared/affected him, and you know that's what he's thinking of here. He doesn't want to lose Abby, no, but he also doesn't want her to have to experience that. And as far as I know, it's the one thing Helen hasn't done--turn into something else.
* Magnus discovering Abby can only communicate through singing, and her and Abby's first duet. I'm going to say a note here about the singing: I am a weird kind of music snob who does not listen to most popular music because it grates (I'm a mild sound-color synasthete and most popular music is too jarring to me) but I firmly believe that music, especially singing, is for everyone. I love how the music in this episode was so organic to the situation: this abnormal can only communicate through music, so other characters have to sing to her. The music wasn't there to show off how awesome the singers are, it was just a tool in the story like a computer or a drug or a guest star. I think the composer did a beautiful job writing parts to fit each actor's strengths and limitations. Pascale got lots of good material because she's a trained singer and has the chops for it (wow, did she ever). Amanda and Robin got less because they aren't. They didn't do a bad job with what they had, though I'd prefer a little less country twang in Robin's voice, and they were successful with it because it was simple enough for a non-singer. I point this out for the girls on Tumblr whining that Amanda didn't have enough singing. She did good with what she had but I don't think she could have pulled off more than that. Robin was much better when he was singing with Pascale than when he was singing alone. Anyway, this scene was really good and I like how it set up Will's reluctance to sing because:
* The scene with Will and Abby when he talks to her, while she's asleep, about his mom. PUNCH. IN. THE. GUT. I love, love, love that he doesn't want to sing because singing brings back painful memories of his mother singing to him whenever he was hurt or scared. I teared up. I really, really teared up. Will should talk about his mother more. Maybe not, because it would lose its impact, but I do love it so much.
* Abby and Will's duet on the roof. Okay, if you know me at all you know I really hate this ship. I don't buy it, I don't feel it, and I don't ship it at all.
But this duet sold me on it. I don't ship it, and it's not what I want, but it does make more sense now and I didn't hate the Will/Abby moments and wish they were over. They got more development in that two minutes of song than they have in their whole relationship so far. Part of my like for this is that Abby had zero of the qualities that annoyed me in earlier episodes and Pascale's singing was amazing. The other thing was Will's feelings were communicated SO WELL in the song: he's been kind of keeping his distance, he really thinks she's it, he knows how she feels because he's been there, and he's scared to death. I don't think it's any coincidence that Abby jumping off the roof is very similar to the scene in Metamorphosis where Will dreams he's jumping off the roof, when he loses both his humanity and his ability to speak (which was terrifying for him and just as terrifying watching it happen to his girlfriend).
* "What is the point of this entire place if we can't save the people that--" Okay, OKAY. God, that was harsh. Magnus's FACE. And I've seen people call Will out for being an asshole here, but I can't, because I CAN'T. He just watched his girlfriend try to kill herself because she is so miserable, and he knows EXACTLY WHY she's miserable because he's experienced it. He's terrified and desperate and this is not a problem he can solve. If he'd just said "okay" and left, I would have been extremely disappointed. The other thing is he has not had the years of dealing with grief and loss that Magnus has. He's still a noob when it comes to that, and I see shit like this as being Will's "toughening up". I am pretty damn sure that Magnus was not as much of a hard-ass when she started out as she is now. That kind of hard-ass only comes from living the life she's led, and Will isn't there yet because he hasn't had the experiences that Magnus has had. it doesn't make him an asshole, it just means he still has stuff to learn. Will's just a year or two younger than me, and he's lost his mother (violently), a girlfriend, a girl who was interested in him, and nearly another girlfriend, all in the space of two-ish years? I haven't gone through that! (I don't work with dangerous creatures either, but anyway.) It doesn't compare to Magnus's losses, but this isn't the Loss Olympics. And Will's personality is different than Magnus's, too, in that he is ALL FEELINGS ALL THE TIME. He wears his heart on his sleeve and has a temper. It doesn't make him an asshole. (how many times does he turn right around and apologize to Magnus before he's hardly finished what he's saying? Not every time, but very often.) But God, you know she's thinking of Ashley and James and Ravi and her dad and a zillion other people, and they both are just breaking my heart here.
but oh ho, apparently Will's just an asshole.
* Daddy Magnus. CRY. It was so lovely.
* The scene where Magnus tells Will what she's going to do to Abby. This scene was so hard, and yet... it was so brilliant, because neither of them were totally right or wrong. I don't think Will really thought Magnus was excited about making some new abnormal. Remember, he's scared shitless for what Abby's going through and she's just tried to kill herself to end it. Magnus was absolutely right to want to do what she could to save Abby, and Will absolutely thought he was acting in Abby's best interest as well. This show would be really fucking boring if Will just said "okay, Magnus, let's do whatever you say" all the time. She was right to lock Will up to keep him from interfering, and Will was right to be pissed about it. It's not neat and clean and pretty and that's why it was so heartbreaking and brilliant.
(um, btw, that was not an annelid. an annelid is a worm and that is not a worm, that's the damn salamander they caught in Firewall.)
* the procedure. Will, Will, Will. And oh, Magnus. Her plan came SO close to killing Abby. When she flatlined and Will crumpled to the floor, I just didn't know what to do. But Magnus absolutely pulled it off and I'm glad. I don't want Abby in the picture but that's not the way I would want it to go, because I don't think Will would ever get over it and it would damage Magnus and Will forever. I'm pretty sure he'd leave the Sanctuary over it. It was bad enough that he showed up just in time to see that thing burst out of Abby. I think Robin's acting in that scene is the best he's done in the series. He didn't say anything except that "just stay", and he didn't need to. It just rips my heart out.
* the scene with him and Abby at the end. I don't ship them, but if I said this scene didn't touch me I'd be lying. The first thing she asks him is "are you okay?" before he can even get a chance to ask about her. And then she hugs him and he just puts his face in her shoulder and she pets his hair and it's so tender I just want to cry. I kind of wish he'd broken up with her after the target talk, but I think it leaves things open for possibilities and I really like it how it is.
* Finally, the last scene with Magnus. It ripped my heart out and stomped on it in the best possible way. I think at this point Will sees himself not exactly as Magnus's equal but close, and I think that he's just kind of lost and bewildered right now because Magnus says she's proud of him and thinks he's doing fine work and could run the Sanctuary, but her actions say something else. Again, I don't think either of them are right or wrong. They just have different ways of doing things and sometimes those ways clash. What got me the most was Will asking her how he's doing, her saying she couldn't be prouder, and he just walks away. Does he walk away because he thinks he's not good enough for Magnus to be proud of (he shakes his head when she says he could run the network), does he not believe her, or does her being proud of him make him think he's headed down a road he doesn't want to go? I DON'T KNOW. AND I LOVE THAT I DON'T KNOW. He just walks away and leaves me whimpering, and leaves Magnus clearly bewildered. It killed me as both a Magnus/Will shipper and someone who is heavily invested in their friendship as the core of this series, and yet I keep watching it over and over and over and over again.
So yeah, I loved it. I can't say it's a favorite, because I don't love it the way I love Carentan and Next Tuesday and Requiem--well, actually, some of the way I love it is similar to Requiem--but it's one I'll watch over and over because it's so complicated.