Numb3rs Ficathon Fic-Mice and Men
Title: Mice and Men
Author: Ceares
Pairing: David Sinclair/Billy Cooper
Rating: R
Disclaimer: All characters belong to other people-darn it! No harm, no foul.
Notes: A million thanks to Nina for the beta, and kind words about the story. This wasn't where I was going when I signed up for this ficathon. That story-a Charlie/Don fic is still in the works. There are vague references to it in this story, but hopefully it works as a completely stand alone piece. Feedback welcome.
Mice and Men
"Sinclair here." David absently answered his cell phone; his mind focused on the details of the new case Don had just briefed them on.
"I left my handcuffs in the hotel room."
David froze at the sound of the husky voice on the other end. He looked around, making sure no one was paying any attention to him before speaking. "And this concerns me how?"
"Well, I figured since it's partly your fault, you should pick them up for me. They'll be at the front desk-just show them your badge."
"I'm not…"
"Come on, Davy boy-I'll let you use them on me next time." The chuckle was low, sending shivers down David's spine.
"There's not going to be a next time. It was an aberration."
There was a moment of silence before Cooper responded, his voice noticeably cooler. "Yeah? Well, that's up to you, Agent Sinclair, but picked them up anyway. I can't leave them there. Mail them to me."
"Yeah, okay, I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks."
**********************************
He picked up the handcuffs during his lunch hour, not quite meeting the eyes of the woman at the front desk as he asked for them. Not that she had any way of knowing that less than twenty-four hours ago, he'd been restrained by them, writhing under strong fingers and a talented mouth, but David felt somehow as if it were written on his face.
It only took a few minutes to get Coop's mailing address, but still David kept the cuffs for almost a week, taking them out frequently and running his fingers over the cool metal, and every time, he was back in the bar, drinking, laughing, flirting with Cooper. Back in the hotel-hungry open, being filled, being fucked. He finally forced himself to drop them in the mail. He watched the package slide away, resisting the urge to grab it back, and shut the door with a sense of finality. It had been an aberration, like he'd told Cooper- an -anomaly, to quote Charlie. A product of circumstance and opportunity, and it was over.
He went back to the office filled with a renewed sense of self. David didn't do things like that. He hadn't since college, not since he'd made his plans for the future. He wanted to be Special Agent in Charge someday; hell, he wanted to be ADIC someday. That was going to be hard enough because he was black; it wasn't ever going to happen if he fucked men. If he occasionally eyed the guys at his gym, or thought Wilkins in accounting had a nice smile; if he noticed Don's great forearms, or the fact that he wore his jeans a little too tight; if he thought Charlie was luminous when he talked about math…none of that mattered, because he had a plan.
So he didn't fuck men. He dated women- attractive, intelligent, career-minded women with as little interest in getting married right now as he had. Even when David had known men, they'd been of the same ilk. Closeted, conservative, reserved. The experience with one Billy Cooper had been far from that. It had been for want of a better word, wild. Fierce and hot and like nothing David had ever done.
Which might possibly be an explanation for, but could never be an excuse why, nearly two months later, when Coop called him and invited him out for drinks, he accepted.
He leaned back against the arm of the booth, and eyed Cooper knowingly. "You don't have to get me drunk to get me into bed you know."
That half-smirking grin appeared. "Is that what I'm doing?"
David gestured to the beer bottles and shot glasses littering the table. "Isn't it? I mean I have to assume if you were just looking for a drinking buddy, you would have called Don."
"What makes you think I didn't? He already had plans."
David's stomach rolled slightly, and he set the beer bottle down, swallowing hard, and telling himself the nausea was a result of the drinking. "Oh, so I'm not even first choice for this evening's entertainment. Nice."
"Look, I'm gonna be here overnight. I know a few people out here, but you two were the only ones I was interested in seeing, and you'd already told me to fuck off."
"I didn't say that."
"Yeah, I know. You put it a little more politely, but it amounted to pretty much the same thing. I still took a chance calling you, even if it wasn't first." Again, the grin, eyes narrowed like he was delivering a punch line. "Don't I get points for that?"
David's stomach settled, and the little voice in the back of his head that had been screaming at him since he'd agreed to come, decided to give up the ghost for the evening. He grinned back at Coop. "Depends. I believe it's my turn with the hand cuffs?"
**********************************
David had just grabbed his jacket when he heard Coop shift. He froze and glanced over at the bed, only to meet angry eyes.
"Going somewhere?"
"Yeah, I ah-I need to get home."
"So you were just gonna sneak out?" Coop sat up in the bed, sheet falling to his waist, and David could see the reddened and scratched patches of skin on his chest. Marks he'd made. He dropped his eyes.
"I didn't want to disturb you."
"What disturbs me is this defiled virgin act you pull after."
"That's not what I'm doing."
"Then what are you doing?"
"Truthfully? I don't know, because I don’t do this. You tell me. Are you gay? Is this how you live? Do you…"
Cooper shrugged. "I like women, but I like men too, and generally they're just easier. No biological clock ticking, no expectations I'm not living up to."
"So what? Just fuck and go? A guy in every town?" David found himself unaccountably angry.
"Nah, I don't have the stamina for that, and even if I did, that's not what I'm looking for."
"Then what? I mean I'm just trying to figure out what we're doing here."
"Look, we both know this isn't a white- picket-fence, happily-ever-after kind of deal-not with what we do. I like you, David. I like your taste in movies, and your sense of humor, and I like having sex with you. I thought we had a connection, and we could enjoy that for a while."
"I'm sorry, Coop. I just don't think I can do this."
Cooper sighed, then got up, unabashedly striding across the room naked, and grabbed his wallet off the dresser. "Okay, here's the deal. I've already set up some time off at the end of next month. Here's my address." He handed David a card. "It'd be great if you could come up for a couple of days-but it's up to you. Just think about it, okay? I won't call again, David. Whatever you decide, the ball is in your court."
David threw the card away as soon as he got home. Then he called a woman he dated occasionally and asked her out to dinner.
Anna was as beautiful and charming as always, but the usual pleasure David got from being with her was missing. He kept remembering sly jokes told in a weathered voice, strong rough hands in place of her elegant, manicured ones.
Back at her apartment, David had himself nearly convinced that things were going to be okay. Before Cooper, it had been a while since he'd seen Anna, and maybe the problem had been a case of under-indulged hormones all along. Except he kept thinking how soft she was in all the places she should be hard.
They hadn't gotten any further than a clinch on the sofa when Anna pulled back. "You seem distracted."
David met her eyes with his own guiltily. "I'm sorry."
"It's alright, but I know that look. That's an 'I'd rather be with someone else look'. I've seen it before. I've had it before."
"Shit! Anna, I don't…"
She put a hand on his arm, her brown eyes warm. "Look, David. You're a great guy, okay. You're easy going, considerate in bed, you laugh at my jokes, you laugh at my boss's jokes. I like you, and I have a nice time with you, but I'm not going to be sobbing into a pint of Haagen Dasz and cursing your name if you don't call again. I'm sure you feel the same way about me."
*********************************
Two weeks later, David sat in the back of the class, watching Charlie. He was teaching some kind of "math for dummies" class, and David had come in on the tail end. Charlie was explaining something about perfect numbers. David found it surprisingly interesting, primarily because of Charlie's enthusiasm for the subject. They met in Charlie's office after the class was over.
"Hey, thanks for doing this for me."
"No problem." Charlie looked up from the files David handed him. "So, any idea when Don might be back?" Don had gotten a call a week ago from Coop. Some guy they'd caught a few years ago was on the loose again, and Cooper wanted Don's help tracking him down, since he was familiar with the guy's habits.
Charlie's question was casual, but David noted a strange tension in the other man. He had his own feelings about Don's absence, a burning in his stomach whenever he thought of Don and Coop together that he refused to call jealousy.
"Nope, we haven't heard anything. Let's hope they catch Kramer, soon though."
Charlie nodded and went back to perusing the papers in front of him. He'd agreed to look over the financial records on the case David was working on, in exchange for lunch and a game of hoops later, in which he promised, with a grin, to beat David's butt.
Lunch with Charlie had been interesting. David had missed part of his lecture, and Charlie had obligingly gone over the concept of perfect, deficient, and abundant numbers, explaining that their study went as far back as Pythagoras, whom David had actually heard of, due to a zealous geometry teacher. Charlie's enthusiasm doubled when he realized David was familiar with the mathematician, and he proceeded to give a mini-biography, only pausing when David glanced subtly at his watch.
"I'm sorry, I've been on a bit of a kick about him lately." His eyes took on a distant look for a moment, before he focused back on David with a smile. "Just, you know, tell me to shut up anytime you get bored."
"It's not that, I just have to get back to the office. I'll see you tonight, though."
David figured he'd go easy on Charlie. The other man had been in the hospital a few months ago with a minor gunshot wound. He and Don had stumbled into a robbery, and Charlie had been the unfortunate recipient of a bullet to the arm. Since Charlie suggested the game, David assumed he was well enough to play, but probably still recovering. Charlie quickly proved he was all healed up.
Despite his display of garbage can hoops finesse, and despite the fact that Don had played pro ball, David had been sure Charlie would be a disaster on the court-a stereo-typical 'unatheletic geek' type. He had an awkward grace, though, and pretty good jump shot that gave David a few worries, but years of ball before the rest of the players out grew him, and the occasional pick up game now, served him well enough that he pulled out a 23-20 victory over Charlie.
"I have to admit it, Charlie, you really did almost kick my butt." They were on the Eppes' back porch, enjoying the cool night air, and the cold beers Charlie had liberated from the refrigerator.
Charlie grinned. "You were fierce out there, man." He glanced over at David appraisingly. "Can I…if I say something-don't take this the wrong way, but, you don't play like you like the game."
David frowned. He'd never really thought about it. Basketball had been a part of his life for as long as he could remember. They had a hoop up over the garage, and standing out in the dusk with his dad, bouncing a ball nearly too big for his hands, was one of his first memories. "No, I do."
"Do you? I'm glad cause you…I mean I love to win as much as the next guy, more probably, but, it's like you're so focused on the goal, you don't enjoy the game."
Charlie was watching him anxiously, and David grinned at him, to show he wasn't upset by what he'd said. Charlie might be right, but that was the way he played. Playing like that had gotten him this far. "Hmm, you wouldn't be plotting to throw me off my game next time, would you, Professor Eppes?"
Charlie's laugh had a hint of relief in it. "I don't need to. I'll get you next time anyway. Soon all the Feds will fear my 'mad basketball skills'."
David shook his head, laughing as well." Ah, the arrogance of youth!"
"Hey! I'm the same age you are."
David realized it was true. Charlie just read younger somehow. Maybe it was because Don was so protective of him-not just Don, everyone really. There was something about him that inspired that. It was easy to forget he was a professor. He often seemed the same age as the students he taught.
Charlie leaned forward and put his bottle on the table, and his knee brushed against David's. He fought the urge to return the pressure. The whole night, he'd willingly acknowledged his attraction to Charlie to himself, reveled in it almost, because clearly, it was men he was missing-not Coop specifically, and that was all right.
He could deal with that, live with that, work that into the plan. Make sure he stayed away from temptation. No more hanging out, having a few beers. No more friendly dinners, no more nothing that didn't involve a group of people.
In spite of everything he'd just told himself, when Charlie leaned forward again, David leaned forward as well. He kissed Charlie, tasting a faint hint of beer-bitter and salt from the chips as Charlie kissed him back for a few seconds before pulling away, flushing.
And that was when David knew he was in trouble; not so much because he just made a move on his boss's brother, and possibly fucked up his career-even though he didn't think Charlie was the type to kiss and tell, but primarily because kissing Charlie was nice. It was pleasant and faintly arousing, but kissing Coop was like defusing bombs, and so, clearly, David had been very, very wrong about what was really going on.
"Uh, David?"
David rubbed a hand over his mouth. "Damn it! I'm sorry, Charlie."
"Ah, not that...I mean you're...just...I can't..."
Watching Charlie stumble for words was almost painful, especially when it was David's fault to begin with. "Look, Charlie, it's okay. Really. Let's just pretend like this didn't happen." He stood up and grabbed his jacket. "I'm gonna head home. Thanks for the game."
Charlie stood up with him, shifting awkwardly. "Are you sure?"
David patted him on the arm; trying his best to make his touch as buddy, buddy as possible. "Definitely. It never, ever happened. Okay?"
Charlie nodded, eyes still somewhat troubled. "Okay. Good night, then."
The card was exactly where he'd thrown it nearly a month ago, in the small garbage can in his bedroom. He didn't ask himself why he'd been careful not to put anything else in the nearly empty can since then, leaving the card laying conveniently on top of a few balled-up pieces of paper.
He lay awake all night, making decisions about his future, revising his plans, second guessing himself, and in the morning, he was no more certain about what he was doing than he'd been when he laid down the night before.
A few weeks later, he was still wondering as he got on a plane headed for northeast Oregon. He called Cooper from the airport, and was gratified to hear genuine pleasure in the other man's voice. He hadn't been sure what his reception would be after the last time they spoke. He wasn't sure the offer would be still open, but he'd decided that since he was currently throwing away the playbook he might as well start taking his first chances right away.
Cooper told him not to bother renting a car, that he was only about half an hour away and to sit tight. The small Oregon town wasn't exactly the kind of place he pictured Coop, and he told him so when he got there.
"Yeah. I grew up around here-could not wait to get out. It was too quiet and peaceful, but after a couple of years in fugitive recovery, I found myself longing for it."
They pulled up in front of a large cabin, set back a couple of hundred yards off the road. "Not that I'm here that much anyway. Most of my time is spent in hotels or on the road."
"In gas station bathrooms and cemeteries." They exchanged a smile. Cooper grabbed his bags out of the car and took them in, and David followed. The inside was clean and neat, and pretty simply appointed. He admired the large stone fireplace, and noticed the gun rack above it.
"You hunt?"
Cooper followed his glance, and grinned his half grin before reaching down to grab the camera that lay unnoticed on the table. "Four legs? Only with this."
It was then that David noticed the photos scattered around, some on the walls, some stacked on the table next to the camera. "These are really good."
"Thanks."
David nodded, glancing over at Coop. "We really don't know very much about each other."
"Yeah, well, we've got time, I hope." The last part was said questioningly. He'd laid the camera back down and straightened to face his visitor.
David took a deep breath, wanting to get his worries out in the open. "I'm not looking to be some kind of substitute for Don."
"Well, that works out, then, 'cause I'm not looking for a substitute for Don. Don and me, that was great, but it's been over for years."
David hated himself for asking, but he had to know. "So, when he came to help you out a couple of weeks ago…?"
"Strictly business. Well, no, that's not true. He needed a friend, but that's all it was. You're the one I invited up here. You're the one I want up here, okay?"
David nodded. "Yeah, okay."
"Anything else?"
"You do know that this is not me at all, right? I have a plan for everything, and this doesn't fit in anywhere."
Coop nodded. "I kind of figured. What I can't figure out is why you came."
David shrugged. He'd asked himself that same question over and over on the trip up, and he hadn't come up with an answer until he'd seen Coop. He leaned into the taller man, reaching up and cupping his hand around the back of Coop's neck, pulling him down until they were eye to eye.
"I decided to enjoy the game for a while." He ignored the quizzical expression in favor of capturing Coop's mouth with his. He'd explain later.
Author: Ceares
Pairing: David Sinclair/Billy Cooper
Rating: R
Disclaimer: All characters belong to other people-darn it! No harm, no foul.
Notes: A million thanks to Nina for the beta, and kind words about the story. This wasn't where I was going when I signed up for this ficathon. That story-a Charlie/Don fic is still in the works. There are vague references to it in this story, but hopefully it works as a completely stand alone piece. Feedback welcome.
Mice and Men
"Sinclair here." David absently answered his cell phone; his mind focused on the details of the new case Don had just briefed them on.
"I left my handcuffs in the hotel room."
David froze at the sound of the husky voice on the other end. He looked around, making sure no one was paying any attention to him before speaking. "And this concerns me how?"
"Well, I figured since it's partly your fault, you should pick them up for me. They'll be at the front desk-just show them your badge."
"I'm not…"
"Come on, Davy boy-I'll let you use them on me next time." The chuckle was low, sending shivers down David's spine.
"There's not going to be a next time. It was an aberration."
There was a moment of silence before Cooper responded, his voice noticeably cooler. "Yeah? Well, that's up to you, Agent Sinclair, but picked them up anyway. I can't leave them there. Mail them to me."
"Yeah, okay, I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks."
**********************************
He picked up the handcuffs during his lunch hour, not quite meeting the eyes of the woman at the front desk as he asked for them. Not that she had any way of knowing that less than twenty-four hours ago, he'd been restrained by them, writhing under strong fingers and a talented mouth, but David felt somehow as if it were written on his face.
It only took a few minutes to get Coop's mailing address, but still David kept the cuffs for almost a week, taking them out frequently and running his fingers over the cool metal, and every time, he was back in the bar, drinking, laughing, flirting with Cooper. Back in the hotel-hungry open, being filled, being fucked. He finally forced himself to drop them in the mail. He watched the package slide away, resisting the urge to grab it back, and shut the door with a sense of finality. It had been an aberration, like he'd told Cooper- an -anomaly, to quote Charlie. A product of circumstance and opportunity, and it was over.
He went back to the office filled with a renewed sense of self. David didn't do things like that. He hadn't since college, not since he'd made his plans for the future. He wanted to be Special Agent in Charge someday; hell, he wanted to be ADIC someday. That was going to be hard enough because he was black; it wasn't ever going to happen if he fucked men. If he occasionally eyed the guys at his gym, or thought Wilkins in accounting had a nice smile; if he noticed Don's great forearms, or the fact that he wore his jeans a little too tight; if he thought Charlie was luminous when he talked about math…none of that mattered, because he had a plan.
So he didn't fuck men. He dated women- attractive, intelligent, career-minded women with as little interest in getting married right now as he had. Even when David had known men, they'd been of the same ilk. Closeted, conservative, reserved. The experience with one Billy Cooper had been far from that. It had been for want of a better word, wild. Fierce and hot and like nothing David had ever done.
Which might possibly be an explanation for, but could never be an excuse why, nearly two months later, when Coop called him and invited him out for drinks, he accepted.
He leaned back against the arm of the booth, and eyed Cooper knowingly. "You don't have to get me drunk to get me into bed you know."
That half-smirking grin appeared. "Is that what I'm doing?"
David gestured to the beer bottles and shot glasses littering the table. "Isn't it? I mean I have to assume if you were just looking for a drinking buddy, you would have called Don."
"What makes you think I didn't? He already had plans."
David's stomach rolled slightly, and he set the beer bottle down, swallowing hard, and telling himself the nausea was a result of the drinking. "Oh, so I'm not even first choice for this evening's entertainment. Nice."
"Look, I'm gonna be here overnight. I know a few people out here, but you two were the only ones I was interested in seeing, and you'd already told me to fuck off."
"I didn't say that."
"Yeah, I know. You put it a little more politely, but it amounted to pretty much the same thing. I still took a chance calling you, even if it wasn't first." Again, the grin, eyes narrowed like he was delivering a punch line. "Don't I get points for that?"
David's stomach settled, and the little voice in the back of his head that had been screaming at him since he'd agreed to come, decided to give up the ghost for the evening. He grinned back at Coop. "Depends. I believe it's my turn with the hand cuffs?"
**********************************
David had just grabbed his jacket when he heard Coop shift. He froze and glanced over at the bed, only to meet angry eyes.
"Going somewhere?"
"Yeah, I ah-I need to get home."
"So you were just gonna sneak out?" Coop sat up in the bed, sheet falling to his waist, and David could see the reddened and scratched patches of skin on his chest. Marks he'd made. He dropped his eyes.
"I didn't want to disturb you."
"What disturbs me is this defiled virgin act you pull after."
"That's not what I'm doing."
"Then what are you doing?"
"Truthfully? I don't know, because I don’t do this. You tell me. Are you gay? Is this how you live? Do you…"
Cooper shrugged. "I like women, but I like men too, and generally they're just easier. No biological clock ticking, no expectations I'm not living up to."
"So what? Just fuck and go? A guy in every town?" David found himself unaccountably angry.
"Nah, I don't have the stamina for that, and even if I did, that's not what I'm looking for."
"Then what? I mean I'm just trying to figure out what we're doing here."
"Look, we both know this isn't a white- picket-fence, happily-ever-after kind of deal-not with what we do. I like you, David. I like your taste in movies, and your sense of humor, and I like having sex with you. I thought we had a connection, and we could enjoy that for a while."
"I'm sorry, Coop. I just don't think I can do this."
Cooper sighed, then got up, unabashedly striding across the room naked, and grabbed his wallet off the dresser. "Okay, here's the deal. I've already set up some time off at the end of next month. Here's my address." He handed David a card. "It'd be great if you could come up for a couple of days-but it's up to you. Just think about it, okay? I won't call again, David. Whatever you decide, the ball is in your court."
David threw the card away as soon as he got home. Then he called a woman he dated occasionally and asked her out to dinner.
Anna was as beautiful and charming as always, but the usual pleasure David got from being with her was missing. He kept remembering sly jokes told in a weathered voice, strong rough hands in place of her elegant, manicured ones.
Back at her apartment, David had himself nearly convinced that things were going to be okay. Before Cooper, it had been a while since he'd seen Anna, and maybe the problem had been a case of under-indulged hormones all along. Except he kept thinking how soft she was in all the places she should be hard.
They hadn't gotten any further than a clinch on the sofa when Anna pulled back. "You seem distracted."
David met her eyes with his own guiltily. "I'm sorry."
"It's alright, but I know that look. That's an 'I'd rather be with someone else look'. I've seen it before. I've had it before."
"Shit! Anna, I don't…"
She put a hand on his arm, her brown eyes warm. "Look, David. You're a great guy, okay. You're easy going, considerate in bed, you laugh at my jokes, you laugh at my boss's jokes. I like you, and I have a nice time with you, but I'm not going to be sobbing into a pint of Haagen Dasz and cursing your name if you don't call again. I'm sure you feel the same way about me."
*********************************
Two weeks later, David sat in the back of the class, watching Charlie. He was teaching some kind of "math for dummies" class, and David had come in on the tail end. Charlie was explaining something about perfect numbers. David found it surprisingly interesting, primarily because of Charlie's enthusiasm for the subject. They met in Charlie's office after the class was over.
"Hey, thanks for doing this for me."
"No problem." Charlie looked up from the files David handed him. "So, any idea when Don might be back?" Don had gotten a call a week ago from Coop. Some guy they'd caught a few years ago was on the loose again, and Cooper wanted Don's help tracking him down, since he was familiar with the guy's habits.
Charlie's question was casual, but David noted a strange tension in the other man. He had his own feelings about Don's absence, a burning in his stomach whenever he thought of Don and Coop together that he refused to call jealousy.
"Nope, we haven't heard anything. Let's hope they catch Kramer, soon though."
Charlie nodded and went back to perusing the papers in front of him. He'd agreed to look over the financial records on the case David was working on, in exchange for lunch and a game of hoops later, in which he promised, with a grin, to beat David's butt.
Lunch with Charlie had been interesting. David had missed part of his lecture, and Charlie had obligingly gone over the concept of perfect, deficient, and abundant numbers, explaining that their study went as far back as Pythagoras, whom David had actually heard of, due to a zealous geometry teacher. Charlie's enthusiasm doubled when he realized David was familiar with the mathematician, and he proceeded to give a mini-biography, only pausing when David glanced subtly at his watch.
"I'm sorry, I've been on a bit of a kick about him lately." His eyes took on a distant look for a moment, before he focused back on David with a smile. "Just, you know, tell me to shut up anytime you get bored."
"It's not that, I just have to get back to the office. I'll see you tonight, though."
David figured he'd go easy on Charlie. The other man had been in the hospital a few months ago with a minor gunshot wound. He and Don had stumbled into a robbery, and Charlie had been the unfortunate recipient of a bullet to the arm. Since Charlie suggested the game, David assumed he was well enough to play, but probably still recovering. Charlie quickly proved he was all healed up.
Despite his display of garbage can hoops finesse, and despite the fact that Don had played pro ball, David had been sure Charlie would be a disaster on the court-a stereo-typical 'unatheletic geek' type. He had an awkward grace, though, and pretty good jump shot that gave David a few worries, but years of ball before the rest of the players out grew him, and the occasional pick up game now, served him well enough that he pulled out a 23-20 victory over Charlie.
"I have to admit it, Charlie, you really did almost kick my butt." They were on the Eppes' back porch, enjoying the cool night air, and the cold beers Charlie had liberated from the refrigerator.
Charlie grinned. "You were fierce out there, man." He glanced over at David appraisingly. "Can I…if I say something-don't take this the wrong way, but, you don't play like you like the game."
David frowned. He'd never really thought about it. Basketball had been a part of his life for as long as he could remember. They had a hoop up over the garage, and standing out in the dusk with his dad, bouncing a ball nearly too big for his hands, was one of his first memories. "No, I do."
"Do you? I'm glad cause you…I mean I love to win as much as the next guy, more probably, but, it's like you're so focused on the goal, you don't enjoy the game."
Charlie was watching him anxiously, and David grinned at him, to show he wasn't upset by what he'd said. Charlie might be right, but that was the way he played. Playing like that had gotten him this far. "Hmm, you wouldn't be plotting to throw me off my game next time, would you, Professor Eppes?"
Charlie's laugh had a hint of relief in it. "I don't need to. I'll get you next time anyway. Soon all the Feds will fear my 'mad basketball skills'."
David shook his head, laughing as well." Ah, the arrogance of youth!"
"Hey! I'm the same age you are."
David realized it was true. Charlie just read younger somehow. Maybe it was because Don was so protective of him-not just Don, everyone really. There was something about him that inspired that. It was easy to forget he was a professor. He often seemed the same age as the students he taught.
Charlie leaned forward and put his bottle on the table, and his knee brushed against David's. He fought the urge to return the pressure. The whole night, he'd willingly acknowledged his attraction to Charlie to himself, reveled in it almost, because clearly, it was men he was missing-not Coop specifically, and that was all right.
He could deal with that, live with that, work that into the plan. Make sure he stayed away from temptation. No more hanging out, having a few beers. No more friendly dinners, no more nothing that didn't involve a group of people.
In spite of everything he'd just told himself, when Charlie leaned forward again, David leaned forward as well. He kissed Charlie, tasting a faint hint of beer-bitter and salt from the chips as Charlie kissed him back for a few seconds before pulling away, flushing.
And that was when David knew he was in trouble; not so much because he just made a move on his boss's brother, and possibly fucked up his career-even though he didn't think Charlie was the type to kiss and tell, but primarily because kissing Charlie was nice. It was pleasant and faintly arousing, but kissing Coop was like defusing bombs, and so, clearly, David had been very, very wrong about what was really going on.
"Uh, David?"
David rubbed a hand over his mouth. "Damn it! I'm sorry, Charlie."
"Ah, not that...I mean you're...just...I can't..."
Watching Charlie stumble for words was almost painful, especially when it was David's fault to begin with. "Look, Charlie, it's okay. Really. Let's just pretend like this didn't happen." He stood up and grabbed his jacket. "I'm gonna head home. Thanks for the game."
Charlie stood up with him, shifting awkwardly. "Are you sure?"
David patted him on the arm; trying his best to make his touch as buddy, buddy as possible. "Definitely. It never, ever happened. Okay?"
Charlie nodded, eyes still somewhat troubled. "Okay. Good night, then."
The card was exactly where he'd thrown it nearly a month ago, in the small garbage can in his bedroom. He didn't ask himself why he'd been careful not to put anything else in the nearly empty can since then, leaving the card laying conveniently on top of a few balled-up pieces of paper.
He lay awake all night, making decisions about his future, revising his plans, second guessing himself, and in the morning, he was no more certain about what he was doing than he'd been when he laid down the night before.
A few weeks later, he was still wondering as he got on a plane headed for northeast Oregon. He called Cooper from the airport, and was gratified to hear genuine pleasure in the other man's voice. He hadn't been sure what his reception would be after the last time they spoke. He wasn't sure the offer would be still open, but he'd decided that since he was currently throwing away the playbook he might as well start taking his first chances right away.
Cooper told him not to bother renting a car, that he was only about half an hour away and to sit tight. The small Oregon town wasn't exactly the kind of place he pictured Coop, and he told him so when he got there.
"Yeah. I grew up around here-could not wait to get out. It was too quiet and peaceful, but after a couple of years in fugitive recovery, I found myself longing for it."
They pulled up in front of a large cabin, set back a couple of hundred yards off the road. "Not that I'm here that much anyway. Most of my time is spent in hotels or on the road."
"In gas station bathrooms and cemeteries." They exchanged a smile. Cooper grabbed his bags out of the car and took them in, and David followed. The inside was clean and neat, and pretty simply appointed. He admired the large stone fireplace, and noticed the gun rack above it.
"You hunt?"
Cooper followed his glance, and grinned his half grin before reaching down to grab the camera that lay unnoticed on the table. "Four legs? Only with this."
It was then that David noticed the photos scattered around, some on the walls, some stacked on the table next to the camera. "These are really good."
"Thanks."
David nodded, glancing over at Coop. "We really don't know very much about each other."
"Yeah, well, we've got time, I hope." The last part was said questioningly. He'd laid the camera back down and straightened to face his visitor.
David took a deep breath, wanting to get his worries out in the open. "I'm not looking to be some kind of substitute for Don."
"Well, that works out, then, 'cause I'm not looking for a substitute for Don. Don and me, that was great, but it's been over for years."
David hated himself for asking, but he had to know. "So, when he came to help you out a couple of weeks ago…?"
"Strictly business. Well, no, that's not true. He needed a friend, but that's all it was. You're the one I invited up here. You're the one I want up here, okay?"
David nodded. "Yeah, okay."
"Anything else?"
"You do know that this is not me at all, right? I have a plan for everything, and this doesn't fit in anywhere."
Coop nodded. "I kind of figured. What I can't figure out is why you came."
David shrugged. He'd asked himself that same question over and over on the trip up, and he hadn't come up with an answer until he'd seen Coop. He leaned into the taller man, reaching up and cupping his hand around the back of Coop's neck, pulling him down until they were eye to eye.
"I decided to enjoy the game for a while." He ignored the quizzical expression in favor of capturing Coop's mouth with his. He'd explain later.