Geek Girls?
There's been a recent surge (resurgence?) in many of my circles about 'geek girls'. Twitter is full of people complaining that women are under-represented, over-hassled, etc in 'geeky circles'. Be it playing video games, programming, etc. I'm seeing several friends on facebook going on at length about why the feminist movement is needed now more than ever. Part of it's posts about the recent political climate, part of it that I know lots of people concerned about 'rape culture'.
And it sounds good, right? Promoting geek girls, being in your face about it, all that. Except it's driving me nuts. I even went to Geek Girl Con a year (2?) ago. I was extremely uncomfortable and didn't enjoy myself at all.
I'm having trouble explaining, even to myself, what's bugging me. I told one person it felt like the emphasis was too much on girl and not enough on geek, and I guess that's sort of right. But it doesn't feel like a good explanation.
I watch this movement, and it feels like high school - like a lot of unnecessary drama. I'm not saying things are fair - they're not, and I know that. I've ran into plenty of disbelief and being discounted because I'm female. It's just...I don't see why it's such a big deal what my gender is. I don't get why some guys seem threatened by it, and I don't see why it needs to be shoved in their faces EITHER.
I don't want to sit with the other girls and knit Star Trek plushies - I want to watch it. I do not want to explain to idiots for the 15th time on a forum what male privilege is and why they don't get it - I want to comment on the posts that drew me to the forum in the first place. I don't want to be part of a panel about women being under-represented in games - I want to play the games.
I do not want a horde of giggly girls trying to shove zelda-themed makeup at me and trying to convince me I need a dr who corset. I do not want them telling me it's 'okay' to be both girly and geeky. I'm not girly. I am geeky. These two things exist seperate from each other. I don't LIKE girly being forced on me. I did not like it in high school when it was cheerleaders and I don't like it now that the pushers are geeks. Changing the label doesn't change the behavior. I'm sick of being told that if I don't highlight the fact that I'm a girl all the freaking time that I'm somehow betraying fellow women, and I don't see why I should go to female-only game nights or be part of a girls-only RPG group.
I just want to enjoy the things I enjoy. I'm a geek. I'm happy with that. The fact that I'm female is completely irrelevant, and I find lately that it's the other women making a big deal out of it - most guys just roll with it. I may get the occasional raised eyebrows or 'but you're a girl' - but kick their butt at Munchkin or dish with them on Star Wars trivia, and they usually forget. Why on earth would I keep bringing it up and making things MORE awkward?
Ladies, I'm one of you, but I don't get you. At all. And telling me I need to be like the rest of you is just as frustrating as some guy telling me I need to get back in the kitchen. Do none of you get this at all?
And it sounds good, right? Promoting geek girls, being in your face about it, all that. Except it's driving me nuts. I even went to Geek Girl Con a year (2?) ago. I was extremely uncomfortable and didn't enjoy myself at all.
I'm having trouble explaining, even to myself, what's bugging me. I told one person it felt like the emphasis was too much on girl and not enough on geek, and I guess that's sort of right. But it doesn't feel like a good explanation.
I watch this movement, and it feels like high school - like a lot of unnecessary drama. I'm not saying things are fair - they're not, and I know that. I've ran into plenty of disbelief and being discounted because I'm female. It's just...I don't see why it's such a big deal what my gender is. I don't get why some guys seem threatened by it, and I don't see why it needs to be shoved in their faces EITHER.
I don't want to sit with the other girls and knit Star Trek plushies - I want to watch it. I do not want to explain to idiots for the 15th time on a forum what male privilege is and why they don't get it - I want to comment on the posts that drew me to the forum in the first place. I don't want to be part of a panel about women being under-represented in games - I want to play the games.
I do not want a horde of giggly girls trying to shove zelda-themed makeup at me and trying to convince me I need a dr who corset. I do not want them telling me it's 'okay' to be both girly and geeky. I'm not girly. I am geeky. These two things exist seperate from each other. I don't LIKE girly being forced on me. I did not like it in high school when it was cheerleaders and I don't like it now that the pushers are geeks. Changing the label doesn't change the behavior. I'm sick of being told that if I don't highlight the fact that I'm a girl all the freaking time that I'm somehow betraying fellow women, and I don't see why I should go to female-only game nights or be part of a girls-only RPG group.
I just want to enjoy the things I enjoy. I'm a geek. I'm happy with that. The fact that I'm female is completely irrelevant, and I find lately that it's the other women making a big deal out of it - most guys just roll with it. I may get the occasional raised eyebrows or 'but you're a girl' - but kick their butt at Munchkin or dish with them on Star Wars trivia, and they usually forget. Why on earth would I keep bringing it up and making things MORE awkward?
Ladies, I'm one of you, but I don't get you. At all. And telling me I need to be like the rest of you is just as frustrating as some guy telling me I need to get back in the kitchen. Do none of you get this at all?