Apr 18, 2005 14:53
another 85 and sunny day in central illinois. Gosh what a flat, lame place but i like it a lot - am loving it. I can't pretend not to be apprehensive about next year and at peace with it but the past few weeks have been so great. I have had so much fun. YL contact work is great - i'm really getting into some relationships w/ these girls which is so cool. I can actually go to a soccer game and see people i know and go up and talk to them. But if i do leave, I'll be leaving on a high note. It would suck if i couldn't go to camp but hey like i've said before, if i had any freaking idea how awesome right now is, a year ago, i would have been in a much happier place. I need to use that as assurance. Maybe I will stay here and buy a house and be here for four years, finding solace even in the fact that my mom cries every time i leave her. What if everything works out like gravy and my dad comes back from mexico, my mom gets a job, we have a new AD? Yeah thats ideal but life isn't ideal.
by the way, happy birthday dad. i hate the fact that you are in a country, in that house all by yourself. I hate it a lot. YL club tonight! holler for that. It'll be interesting w/ out our mastermind but i think it will be good. talked to b.trost last night. he said i was wise. i think he is one of the greatest human beings. convo reminds me of second semester junior year happenings in o'leary's class. i like that i didnt tell anyone about that. im not ashamed i just like the enclave group that knows about it, its a good group of kids, sans rosemary. i'm not making sense to anyone but myself. kind of like those lame poems we have to read. i haven't gotten anything out of any poem in say, the last 2 months maybe. o well have a good one friend