(no subject)
So, here we are, on the eve of turning forty.
I had a very good weekend prior to it with my girls, spending a good part of Saturday off at Coco Key where they got to play in the water for several hours. We took in a couple of movies this weekend with Despicable Me on Friday and finishing off the third Back to the Future movie on Saturday. It was a real treat watching the Back to the Future movies with them since they were completely new and they were simply fun and exciting for them. Miria completely got into the tense moments of them all towards the end of each one and they wanted to watch them all at once and then again. Amethyst figures story ideas out a bit more being older and she really enjoyed the wackiness of it all and grappling with the time travel aspects. The movie viewing experiences have been really good with them and they're far more interested in seeing what else I recommend after these three flicks.
The girls had a family birthday party for me on Sunday in which they invited Daniel and Kim over for. My mother helped them along with everything and they picked out a really great cake. It was a full on Batman action cake with the words "Happy Birthday" and "My Hero" written on it. My mother said that they both picked out the words themselves when she asked them what they wanted it to say, which just made it all the more heartwarming. Sunday proved to be very relaxing and fun with everyone there, made it special and enjoyable. Amethyst and Miria and my mother all got me different DC Comics action figures, with a Star Girl, Wonder Woman Blackest Night and a Blue Lantern Flash from it to start off my new collection of larger figures. Cake was delicious, company was wonderful and we had a good dinner together. Very positive all around.
I got to spend some special time with each of the girls this weekend doing different things. With Miria, we started playing Littlebigplanet 2 which I had gotten in for her and she completely got into it. She gets frustrated of course at times, but it's a teaching moment for them. With amethyst, we had some good discussions about various things and had some very good time talking on the trip up to Fitchburg on Saturday. She's getting better at communicating things, but still apologizing a lot for things that need no apology. It's a defense mechanism she's come up with in the last few months that I think stems in some way from the changes going on in her life and I'm hoping to get that explored some in the near future.
As the hours count down until I turn forty, I continue to be in this strange place where I admit I really don't feel it, at least in how it used to be portrayed by family members and other adults from when I was much younger. I remember quite a few celebrations of it and the various gags about being over the hill, but those kinds of things have faltered over the years and at least within the circle that I know, it's not quite the stigma it once was to some degree. It's humbling to think that I'm likely at or past the haflway mark of my life, but it just reinforces the idea that I want to enjoy my life as mucha s I can, and not to be quite so beholden to the things that don't make me happy. I've got a lot of wonderful things and people in my life that I want to enjoy it with and I keep intending to do that and work it in any way that I can. I definitely need to do this more as the stresses in my life are increasing and while I can handle it, the pressure is definitely becoming more than it has before but in a different way.
I have long grappled with my mortality. When I was young, it was fairly paralyzing at times as it kept me from doing a lot of things that were outgoing for fear of being hurt and hurt badly. There are numerous shows and movies that I watch that touch on death to varying degrees and those can often send my mind down that path as well, thinking about what it means, what's left, what it will be like and how scared I can really be about it. There are things that ground me to be sure, but it's still there, ever persent. Turning forty certainly brings all of it to the forefront again. It's not controlling my life like it used to at the least and if anything it's just a reminder that nothing lasts forever and it's best to enjoy the present and plan for what you can of the future, but to leave room for adjustments.
I haven't been dreading this day coming, something that many do, and I won't let it define me. Miria continue to insst that I'm not old as she doesn't like that kind of talk so I'll take my cue from her.
I had a very good weekend prior to it with my girls, spending a good part of Saturday off at Coco Key where they got to play in the water for several hours. We took in a couple of movies this weekend with Despicable Me on Friday and finishing off the third Back to the Future movie on Saturday. It was a real treat watching the Back to the Future movies with them since they were completely new and they were simply fun and exciting for them. Miria completely got into the tense moments of them all towards the end of each one and they wanted to watch them all at once and then again. Amethyst figures story ideas out a bit more being older and she really enjoyed the wackiness of it all and grappling with the time travel aspects. The movie viewing experiences have been really good with them and they're far more interested in seeing what else I recommend after these three flicks.
The girls had a family birthday party for me on Sunday in which they invited Daniel and Kim over for. My mother helped them along with everything and they picked out a really great cake. It was a full on Batman action cake with the words "Happy Birthday" and "My Hero" written on it. My mother said that they both picked out the words themselves when she asked them what they wanted it to say, which just made it all the more heartwarming. Sunday proved to be very relaxing and fun with everyone there, made it special and enjoyable. Amethyst and Miria and my mother all got me different DC Comics action figures, with a Star Girl, Wonder Woman Blackest Night and a Blue Lantern Flash from it to start off my new collection of larger figures. Cake was delicious, company was wonderful and we had a good dinner together. Very positive all around.
I got to spend some special time with each of the girls this weekend doing different things. With Miria, we started playing Littlebigplanet 2 which I had gotten in for her and she completely got into it. She gets frustrated of course at times, but it's a teaching moment for them. With amethyst, we had some good discussions about various things and had some very good time talking on the trip up to Fitchburg on Saturday. She's getting better at communicating things, but still apologizing a lot for things that need no apology. It's a defense mechanism she's come up with in the last few months that I think stems in some way from the changes going on in her life and I'm hoping to get that explored some in the near future.
As the hours count down until I turn forty, I continue to be in this strange place where I admit I really don't feel it, at least in how it used to be portrayed by family members and other adults from when I was much younger. I remember quite a few celebrations of it and the various gags about being over the hill, but those kinds of things have faltered over the years and at least within the circle that I know, it's not quite the stigma it once was to some degree. It's humbling to think that I'm likely at or past the haflway mark of my life, but it just reinforces the idea that I want to enjoy my life as mucha s I can, and not to be quite so beholden to the things that don't make me happy. I've got a lot of wonderful things and people in my life that I want to enjoy it with and I keep intending to do that and work it in any way that I can. I definitely need to do this more as the stresses in my life are increasing and while I can handle it, the pressure is definitely becoming more than it has before but in a different way.
I have long grappled with my mortality. When I was young, it was fairly paralyzing at times as it kept me from doing a lot of things that were outgoing for fear of being hurt and hurt badly. There are numerous shows and movies that I watch that touch on death to varying degrees and those can often send my mind down that path as well, thinking about what it means, what's left, what it will be like and how scared I can really be about it. There are things that ground me to be sure, but it's still there, ever persent. Turning forty certainly brings all of it to the forefront again. It's not controlling my life like it used to at the least and if anything it's just a reminder that nothing lasts forever and it's best to enjoy the present and plan for what you can of the future, but to leave room for adjustments.
I haven't been dreading this day coming, something that many do, and I won't let it define me. Miria continue to insst that I'm not old as she doesn't like that kind of talk so I'll take my cue from her.