I don't have a microwave oven but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks shit.
Have I ever mentioned my love for Mitch Hedberg? It is deep and pure. If you haven't heard of him, he was a stand-up comedian, and he was really awesome. I first listened to this album in its entirety while standing in a room in Germany last year when we were all supposed to be leaving and going somewhere else, and yet none of us could budge because then we might have missed a moment of the hilarity.
For instance:
"I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!""
And my life in a single joke:
"I sit at my hotel at night, I think of something that's funny, then I go get a pen and I write it down. Or if the pen's too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of ain't funny."
And many other hilarious things for which I will not spoil you. Mitch Hedberg is really all about the delivery -- even though a ton of his stuff is hilarious if you just see it written out, it is SO much more hilarious after you've heard his voice and you've got the intonation in your head. Take! Enjoy!
Mitch All Together
For instance:
"I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!""
And my life in a single joke:
"I sit at my hotel at night, I think of something that's funny, then I go get a pen and I write it down. Or if the pen's too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of ain't funny."
And many other hilarious things for which I will not spoil you. Mitch Hedberg is really all about the delivery -- even though a ton of his stuff is hilarious if you just see it written out, it is SO much more hilarious after you've heard his voice and you've got the intonation in your head. Take! Enjoy!
Mitch All Together