(no subject)
So, I guess I want to take this time (and post)
to thank everyone who has been a friend to me.
And by friend I mean true fucking friend.
NOT someone who occasionally IMs or txts you.
NOT someone who says "Hi!" in the hallways or streets.
SOMEONE who is there for you, that has suffered through shit with you-
good and bad. Someone who has held you or listened while you cried and bitched.
Someone who understands that silence is both beautiful and loud.
Why am I doin' this? I guess it's because after last night
I feel really lonely. And not in the sense that I don't think I have
anyone (which I know I do) but... that there's only a few.
And a lot of people that I thought I could call friends,
by it's true meaning, aren't that.
And so I just wanted to "verbally" show everyone
how much they mean to me (even though this isn't even half of it).
Because, few of you as there are, you mean so fucking much to me.
Melody: I'm not sure if I really can find the words for you. We have been though more than a lot of people go through together. From growing up to late night IHOP visits, those weird late-night trips to get Douchebag Doug, to laying in the cold grass starin' at stars to fighting and growing apart and having a love so fuckin' huge it could swallow the ozone. You are one amazing woman. You have pushed me and helped me to believe in myself. You listen, you bitch, and you tell me how it is. And I thank you for that, I really do. I'm glad I can do the things I do with you. Eat sushi, smoke, drink, be your DD after leaving Willowbrook, haha. Man. I don't know what I would do without you, and I really mean that. Sometimes I wonder if I would have survived, without you.
Emily (Mikkelsen): Gah damn, girl. It's so weird how we became friends. After hating you for talking to George and then changing my mind a month later. You are pretty spectacular. I sometimes wonder if I'm a bad influence on you, haha, but I guess not. You make your own choices, I'm just here to join in on the fun. I would not give up any memory of us- the park, crazy teenage driving, Wal*Mart, having conversationst hat range from sex to the meaning of Orwell and Palahnuik's books... I really am so g=lad I have you to talk to, babygirl. You can let me know what I'm doing wrong (even though I already know it myself).
Rachael: Man, oh man. You are fucking ridiculously awesome. One reason I was actually looking forward to going back to school this year was specifically to hang out with you (I mean, who else would I smoke cigarettes with at school? Really, now.) I wish we hung out more, but the times that we have I don't think I can ever forget. I love riding in your car, singing and screaming becuase you almost kill us, smokin a j driving through the country, blowin on grass in the middle of AC's drive-circle. I hate that people have fucked you over so much. I plan on, uh, not doing that (haha). Seriously, girl. You don't bring any drama or shit into my life and you are one special person for that.
Dylan: So, while we have had our many downs (and arguments), you have been there for me. Like an overprotective really annoying big brother, haha. I've annoyed you with my relationshit bitching and you have scared me half to death with your stories of what you do with your free time (+ booze). I miss you. And while we do disagree on a few CERTAIN things, you have really been there for me and pulled me through a lot of times. I miss riding with you through the night. Getting you to buy me Chinese food cause I'm too poor... 4th period? Yeah. Never never never will I forget you (or your lame-ass yearbook signing, haha). Much love, brah.
Maggi: You are truly like a second sister to me. Only one that's a little more rational and laid back. You've made Myra happy which, in turn, makes me happy. I'm really glad I can talk to you about things. It's been such a long time that it just seems like you've always been here, and- shit- that's all I can ask for. You've made me feel so comfortable and included that there is no way I can thank you. I am ridiculously happy that you are a part of our (crazy, messed up) family.
Myra: Yeah, you. Didn't think you were going to be on here, did you? You're my sister and the one person that has seen me grow up and grow through changes. You've been my strength and my weakness. My mentor and my stand-in mother when I was too scared to call mom myself. There are too many memories between us, that I don't know where to start. A lot has changed since you moved away from home, but you still accept me for myself and my decisions, and without you all these years I'm sure that I would have had a much more difficult time trying to keep my head above water. I love you, big sister.
Kevin: Sometimes... I get so caught up in how good you are to me that I don't know what to say. You are my best friend and my lover. You have shown me what happiness is and what love is. With you I have experienced the more beautiful side of life, and I can't let that go. And... while I still feel like I have flaws, you love me for ME. And don't you dare think that you are not perfect to me. For me. With you, talking to you, laying next to you without a sound? That's when I am at my most beautiful. Our memories are numerous and our inside jokes are plenty, enough, as well (haha.) Pilot Mountain, moving out day, cooking together ♥, Smashing Pumpkins (!!!), 4th of July... god. There are so many. And I hope many, many more. Baby, you know that all I need is you. And yeah, it's fucking corny to say but you do complete me. You know me better than I know myself and you are the only one that I can't hide anything from. I promised you, remember? I plan on keeping that promise. And I do wish that words were enough, but they aren't. You are too amazing for them.
In a horridly short but still very important end note, I still want to thank those that I hope to become much better friends with. You guys are fucking crazy but fucking awesome. Kurt, Zack, Becca, Alex Cohen (♥), Chris "Brendon" Davis... you guys have given me something that I can't describe. Laughter, good feelings, a place to stay. Shit. I'm no good with words.
End.
to thank everyone who has been a friend to me.
And by friend I mean true fucking friend.
NOT someone who occasionally IMs or txts you.
NOT someone who says "Hi!" in the hallways or streets.
SOMEONE who is there for you, that has suffered through shit with you-
good and bad. Someone who has held you or listened while you cried and bitched.
Someone who understands that silence is both beautiful and loud.
Why am I doin' this? I guess it's because after last night
I feel really lonely. And not in the sense that I don't think I have
anyone (which I know I do) but... that there's only a few.
And a lot of people that I thought I could call friends,
by it's true meaning, aren't that.
And so I just wanted to "verbally" show everyone
how much they mean to me (even though this isn't even half of it).
Because, few of you as there are, you mean so fucking much to me.
Melody: I'm not sure if I really can find the words for you. We have been though more than a lot of people go through together. From growing up to late night IHOP visits, those weird late-night trips to get Douchebag Doug, to laying in the cold grass starin' at stars to fighting and growing apart and having a love so fuckin' huge it could swallow the ozone. You are one amazing woman. You have pushed me and helped me to believe in myself. You listen, you bitch, and you tell me how it is. And I thank you for that, I really do. I'm glad I can do the things I do with you. Eat sushi, smoke, drink, be your DD after leaving Willowbrook, haha. Man. I don't know what I would do without you, and I really mean that. Sometimes I wonder if I would have survived, without you.
Emily (Mikkelsen): Gah damn, girl. It's so weird how we became friends. After hating you for talking to George and then changing my mind a month later. You are pretty spectacular. I sometimes wonder if I'm a bad influence on you, haha, but I guess not. You make your own choices, I'm just here to join in on the fun. I would not give up any memory of us- the park, crazy teenage driving, Wal*Mart, having conversationst hat range from sex to the meaning of Orwell and Palahnuik's books... I really am so g=lad I have you to talk to, babygirl. You can let me know what I'm doing wrong (even though I already know it myself).
Rachael: Man, oh man. You are fucking ridiculously awesome. One reason I was actually looking forward to going back to school this year was specifically to hang out with you (I mean, who else would I smoke cigarettes with at school? Really, now.) I wish we hung out more, but the times that we have I don't think I can ever forget. I love riding in your car, singing and screaming becuase you almost kill us, smokin a j driving through the country, blowin on grass in the middle of AC's drive-circle. I hate that people have fucked you over so much. I plan on, uh, not doing that (haha). Seriously, girl. You don't bring any drama or shit into my life and you are one special person for that.
Dylan: So, while we have had our many downs (and arguments), you have been there for me. Like an overprotective really annoying big brother, haha. I've annoyed you with my relationshit bitching and you have scared me half to death with your stories of what you do with your free time (+ booze). I miss you. And while we do disagree on a few CERTAIN things, you have really been there for me and pulled me through a lot of times. I miss riding with you through the night. Getting you to buy me Chinese food cause I'm too poor... 4th period? Yeah. Never never never will I forget you (or your lame-ass yearbook signing, haha). Much love, brah.
Maggi: You are truly like a second sister to me. Only one that's a little more rational and laid back. You've made Myra happy which, in turn, makes me happy. I'm really glad I can talk to you about things. It's been such a long time that it just seems like you've always been here, and- shit- that's all I can ask for. You've made me feel so comfortable and included that there is no way I can thank you. I am ridiculously happy that you are a part of our (crazy, messed up) family.
Myra: Yeah, you. Didn't think you were going to be on here, did you? You're my sister and the one person that has seen me grow up and grow through changes. You've been my strength and my weakness. My mentor and my stand-in mother when I was too scared to call mom myself. There are too many memories between us, that I don't know where to start. A lot has changed since you moved away from home, but you still accept me for myself and my decisions, and without you all these years I'm sure that I would have had a much more difficult time trying to keep my head above water. I love you, big sister.
Kevin: Sometimes... I get so caught up in how good you are to me that I don't know what to say. You are my best friend and my lover. You have shown me what happiness is and what love is. With you I have experienced the more beautiful side of life, and I can't let that go. And... while I still feel like I have flaws, you love me for ME. And don't you dare think that you are not perfect to me. For me. With you, talking to you, laying next to you without a sound? That's when I am at my most beautiful. Our memories are numerous and our inside jokes are plenty, enough, as well (haha.) Pilot Mountain, moving out day, cooking together ♥, Smashing Pumpkins (!!!), 4th of July... god. There are so many. And I hope many, many more. Baby, you know that all I need is you. And yeah, it's fucking corny to say but you do complete me. You know me better than I know myself and you are the only one that I can't hide anything from. I promised you, remember? I plan on keeping that promise. And I do wish that words were enough, but they aren't. You are too amazing for them.
In a horridly short but still very important end note, I still want to thank those that I hope to become much better friends with. You guys are fucking crazy but fucking awesome. Kurt, Zack, Becca, Alex Cohen (♥), Chris "Brendon" Davis... you guys have given me something that I can't describe. Laughter, good feelings, a place to stay. Shit. I'm no good with words.
End.