Something unexpected from Facebook.
I know Facebook is all about connecting people (even people you may not watn to connect with). It unfortunately connected me with someone I really was hoping it wouldn't.
I used to have a best friend when I was 19. She used to go out with my older brother but when they broke up we still stay in touch and hung out. The problem was, she started to act like she had ot be in control of my life. I used to talk to her about everything including when I was newly married, my new husband. She loved to hear dirt. Now my spouse and I were having issues (I was 23) and he knew I talked to her alot but he felt uncomfortable and asked I tone down what I told her. I agreed as I thought she was getting to be a bit much too. Next time I talked to her I gave less. She pressed for more information on things even I didn't want to discuss. I straight up said that as a couple agreed that she shouldn't be having such information and that I wasn't going to discuss it with her. She backed down and cut the call short. I was happy as I had stood up to her and we were still friends.
Little did I know but she waited till she knew I was going to be out and my spouse would be home. She then called him. I found out from him later that she said she was having problems with her spouse and had a rant. He in turn talked about me and our problems. The next day she called and started yelling at me about how she "knew about what is REALLY going on!" and that "I know you're doing everything" and on and on. There was stuff she sprewed at me that I knew didn't come from me. I asked politely where she heard this? She slowed down and (sounding confused then blasted me) told me "I called back and asked him and he told me the TRUTH!"
I said "Hmm. Now I realize that this is all none of your business. And after my spouse had told me he didn't want this to be discussed with you and you KNEW this but went behind my back to get nosy with him. I don't owe you anything. BUT because you are acting like you have the right to treat me like this I will respond to some of these points." I referred to certain points in her tirade, giving my point of view and basically she looked like a bigger idiot than before. I said "You can't get one side and expect that's the whole story. But what surprised me was that you felt you had to dig into my privacy and then attack me. That's not the behaviour of a friend. And frankly you haven't acted like a friend in a long time. Goodbye."
I gave my spouse hell later. I didn't speak to her ever again but that friendship had soured so I didn't see anything recoverable even before that moment. She tried calling me saying thaat she misunderstood and that it was my fault for not telling her things. (I was all "Uh huh, it was my fault".) And that she had seen me at a distance etc and wanted to reconnect. I keep telling her that it's pretty much over.
Yesterday she sent me a message asking if I remembered her. I said "Yes. Which is why I'm uninterested in talking to you."
As they say in Frozen, she should just "Let it go."
I used to have a best friend when I was 19. She used to go out with my older brother but when they broke up we still stay in touch and hung out. The problem was, she started to act like she had ot be in control of my life. I used to talk to her about everything including when I was newly married, my new husband. She loved to hear dirt. Now my spouse and I were having issues (I was 23) and he knew I talked to her alot but he felt uncomfortable and asked I tone down what I told her. I agreed as I thought she was getting to be a bit much too. Next time I talked to her I gave less. She pressed for more information on things even I didn't want to discuss. I straight up said that as a couple agreed that she shouldn't be having such information and that I wasn't going to discuss it with her. She backed down and cut the call short. I was happy as I had stood up to her and we were still friends.
Little did I know but she waited till she knew I was going to be out and my spouse would be home. She then called him. I found out from him later that she said she was having problems with her spouse and had a rant. He in turn talked about me and our problems. The next day she called and started yelling at me about how she "knew about what is REALLY going on!" and that "I know you're doing everything" and on and on. There was stuff she sprewed at me that I knew didn't come from me. I asked politely where she heard this? She slowed down and (sounding confused then blasted me) told me "I called back and asked him and he told me the TRUTH!"
I said "Hmm. Now I realize that this is all none of your business. And after my spouse had told me he didn't want this to be discussed with you and you KNEW this but went behind my back to get nosy with him. I don't owe you anything. BUT because you are acting like you have the right to treat me like this I will respond to some of these points." I referred to certain points in her tirade, giving my point of view and basically she looked like a bigger idiot than before. I said "You can't get one side and expect that's the whole story. But what surprised me was that you felt you had to dig into my privacy and then attack me. That's not the behaviour of a friend. And frankly you haven't acted like a friend in a long time. Goodbye."
I gave my spouse hell later. I didn't speak to her ever again but that friendship had soured so I didn't see anything recoverable even before that moment. She tried calling me saying thaat she misunderstood and that it was my fault for not telling her things. (I was all "Uh huh, it was my fault".) And that she had seen me at a distance etc and wanted to reconnect. I keep telling her that it's pretty much over.
Yesterday she sent me a message asking if I remembered her. I said "Yes. Which is why I'm uninterested in talking to you."
As they say in Frozen, she should just "Let it go."