The blind leading the blind
I have been thinking about love lately (this is in part due to the time I have on my own and in part to seeing my perfect ideal of love on the TV everyday). Sometimes I miss swimming because of that - being too tired to even think about anything and all the happy chemicals - yes.
Now I have lots of time to think - sometimes it is good, sometimes I just go through the same things in my head over and over and over again. They do not become depressing thoughts but rather boring thoughts, if you understand.
So to love. I think before college I use to think that love was the VERY best thing ever. Now I think that truth is the very best thing ever. But I think they are connected. I think I use to believe that if there is no truth or if the truth is not known then there can be no love. I don't believe this anymore. I still don't accept the idea of "blind love" because if it is blind it can't really be "true love" but it can be blind devotion - it can feel like love. Or maybe love can be lost. Or love can be of something that the truth was known about before. Actually this is the problem - I don't have a clue anymore. Okay let me try and make sense of this, I think "lasting true love" has to be about truth, but there can be "true love" without (?). Maybe.
Are you beginning to see the problem. Because I am. The thing I sometimes wonder about is will I find "lasting true love" I want to, but I can't expect it and I don't see it happening, but if it doesn't happen I don't see exactly where my life is going and this is a problem. I think I have banked too much of my future on love. oy vey. I just want to forget about it!!!!!
Now I have lots of time to think - sometimes it is good, sometimes I just go through the same things in my head over and over and over again. They do not become depressing thoughts but rather boring thoughts, if you understand.
So to love. I think before college I use to think that love was the VERY best thing ever. Now I think that truth is the very best thing ever. But I think they are connected. I think I use to believe that if there is no truth or if the truth is not known then there can be no love. I don't believe this anymore. I still don't accept the idea of "blind love" because if it is blind it can't really be "true love" but it can be blind devotion - it can feel like love. Or maybe love can be lost. Or love can be of something that the truth was known about before. Actually this is the problem - I don't have a clue anymore. Okay let me try and make sense of this, I think "lasting true love" has to be about truth, but there can be "true love" without (?). Maybe.
Are you beginning to see the problem. Because I am. The thing I sometimes wonder about is will I find "lasting true love" I want to, but I can't expect it and I don't see it happening, but if it doesn't happen I don't see exactly where my life is going and this is a problem. I think I have banked too much of my future on love. oy vey. I just want to forget about it!!!!!