There'll Always Be An England
There are times when it really hits me full force that I'm living in a foreign country. Exhibit A: The Royal Wedding.
Man, the Great British Public is going all out for this sucker. There are going to be STREET PARTIES. Granted, most of the people I know personally profess to be fed up with the whole thing, aren't interested in watching, could care less what Kate Middleton's dress will look like or what kind of favours the wedding guests will get. But given the public hype, either I know an unusually down-to-earth set of people, or we're all scoffing in public and then running out and buying Union flag bunting and commemorative cushions secretly at night.
(I say "we", not because I have any interest in commemorative cushions, but because I did find myself getting sucked into the reading about some of the details, especially when I found the official site - a creepy and stalkerish look at the upcoming nuptials! Want to see the bride's baby pictures? Join in the debate about which military uniform the groom should wear? Did you know that the see-through dress Kate was wearing the night she caught William's eye is now being sold at auction? *shudder*)
So now, for your enjoyment, a look at some of the surrounding madness:
The BBC has a gallery of souvenirs, although trust me, those are the tamer ones (except maybe the Official Royal Wedding Sick Bag). By the way, a colleague of mine is going to be watching the wedding at a party where they're all wearing Royal Family masks.
The British Museum is getting in on the act, although upon closer inspection, there's only one actual Royal Wedding souvenir in their "Royal Wedding Collection". There are also two books about royalty, and one about weddings: the rest is a bunch of their "classic" range of souvenirs that they're apparently desperate to shift. Celebrate the Royal Wedding with a Great Court coffee mug! Um... what?
Not so at John Lewis, which is offering page after page of commemorative homewares, china (including an "It Should Have Been Me" collection - classy), food, soap, and games. I mean GODDAMN.
If you think that's bad, though, check out royally-licensed Fortnum and Mason. Is it awful that I'm now craving some of that commemorative rose-petal jelly? Even Harrod's has put out a modest collection, which is pretty impressive, all things considered. Then again, I suppose, to Mohamed Al Fayed, this is still the son of the woman his own late son was supposed to marry, so...
Any number of pubs and restaurants are offering special Royal Wedding Weekend menus, but I was especially puzzled by this one from Masala Zone. A Royal Wedding menu seems a little bit "pining for the last days of the Raj" for one of the country's most modern Indian restaurants, doesn't it?
Speaking of food, Twinings has released a Royal Wedding tea. And yes, I sent away for a free sample. I mean, hype or no hype, it's a white Earl Grey with rose, which sounds LOVELY.
There are also Royal Wedding comic books, naturally. The Forbidden Planet blog has a good round-up, delivered in a snarky tone that reminds me why I freaking love Forbidden Planet. Far and away the best, though, is Neill Cameron's one-page version of how the couple met. "Princely jetpack, GO!"
And finally, I must admit, I actually googled this one, because I knew - KNEW! - it had to exist. Sure enough: Royal Wedding sex toys. You're welcome.
Man, the Great British Public is going all out for this sucker. There are going to be STREET PARTIES. Granted, most of the people I know personally profess to be fed up with the whole thing, aren't interested in watching, could care less what Kate Middleton's dress will look like or what kind of favours the wedding guests will get. But given the public hype, either I know an unusually down-to-earth set of people, or we're all scoffing in public and then running out and buying Union flag bunting and commemorative cushions secretly at night.
(I say "we", not because I have any interest in commemorative cushions, but because I did find myself getting sucked into the reading about some of the details, especially when I found the official site - a creepy and stalkerish look at the upcoming nuptials! Want to see the bride's baby pictures? Join in the debate about which military uniform the groom should wear? Did you know that the see-through dress Kate was wearing the night she caught William's eye is now being sold at auction? *shudder*)
So now, for your enjoyment, a look at some of the surrounding madness:
The BBC has a gallery of souvenirs, although trust me, those are the tamer ones (except maybe the Official Royal Wedding Sick Bag). By the way, a colleague of mine is going to be watching the wedding at a party where they're all wearing Royal Family masks.
The British Museum is getting in on the act, although upon closer inspection, there's only one actual Royal Wedding souvenir in their "Royal Wedding Collection". There are also two books about royalty, and one about weddings: the rest is a bunch of their "classic" range of souvenirs that they're apparently desperate to shift. Celebrate the Royal Wedding with a Great Court coffee mug! Um... what?
Not so at John Lewis, which is offering page after page of commemorative homewares, china (including an "It Should Have Been Me" collection - classy), food, soap, and games. I mean GODDAMN.
If you think that's bad, though, check out royally-licensed Fortnum and Mason. Is it awful that I'm now craving some of that commemorative rose-petal jelly? Even Harrod's has put out a modest collection, which is pretty impressive, all things considered. Then again, I suppose, to Mohamed Al Fayed, this is still the son of the woman his own late son was supposed to marry, so...
Any number of pubs and restaurants are offering special Royal Wedding Weekend menus, but I was especially puzzled by this one from Masala Zone. A Royal Wedding menu seems a little bit "pining for the last days of the Raj" for one of the country's most modern Indian restaurants, doesn't it?
Speaking of food, Twinings has released a Royal Wedding tea. And yes, I sent away for a free sample. I mean, hype or no hype, it's a white Earl Grey with rose, which sounds LOVELY.
There are also Royal Wedding comic books, naturally. The Forbidden Planet blog has a good round-up, delivered in a snarky tone that reminds me why I freaking love Forbidden Planet. Far and away the best, though, is Neill Cameron's one-page version of how the couple met. "Princely jetpack, GO!"
And finally, I must admit, I actually googled this one, because I knew - KNEW! - it had to exist. Sure enough: Royal Wedding sex toys. You're welcome.