fic // TVXQ // Our Little Princess #5
Title: Our Little Princess
Author: catachrestical
Keywords: Bandfic; hints of JaeHo and YooSu; some original characters.
Rating: PG13 for few language mishaps.
Disclaimer: Do not own, did not happen.
Notes:The boys found themselves having to take care of two orphan kids.
First version beta'd by janeberryblue; current version re-beta'd by bel_chan ♥
Thanks for reading :)
*
→ previous: #1 | #2 | #3 | #4
Our Little Princess
Chapter 5: Maybe We'll Get Together
"Maybe we'll get together, maybe forever,
...maybe just for a while."
- Aqualung, Can't Get You Out Of My Mind.
The clock chimed two times.
The silver moon peeked from the small window above the sink. Bare feet sounded on the marble floor; gentle, quiet, almost apologetic in the way they were disrupting the peace of the night. A shadow hesitated a little near the hallway connecting bedrooms and living room, hesitated a little more at the junction connecting living room and dining room-as if with each distance she gained, darkness would shift and turn itself into something untouchable, implausible; something Kane was really scared of.
Arisugawa Kane hated darkness, but more than that, she hated admitting that she hated darkness.
She supposed she could turn the lights on-oh, right, she forgot she was short and six years old. Why did people put light switches so high on the wall anyway?
Her stomach growled and she jumped (again). Kane cursed a certain nii-san for stealing a piece of her bulgogi at dinner and quickened her steps. The target was clear: the pack of Gummi Bears on the kitchen counter. There was a post-it-note with neat handwriting scrawled on it that said: 'Property of Max ChangMin. Trespassers will be punished!!! >:|', with big bold letters and an emoticon for emphasis.
Like everyone else in the house, Kane had learned to ignore the note. She climbed up a stool and was reaching for it when the front door opened. Her hands stilled; her eyes widened.
Who could it be? Everyone had long gone to sleep! Was it a ghost? No, no, ghosts didn't open doors, they walked through them!
...Wait. That could only mean...
Clutching her Hello Kitty plushie tight (a gift from a fan JunSu nii-san didn't know what to do with) to her chest, Kane climbed down the stool soundlessly and crept along the walls leading to the living room. She was right. There was a person, whose face she couldn't see, and he was walking-tiptoeing-to the living room with something in his hand.
Thief!
Kane inched closer-before realizing that there was no way she could reach the master bedroom without making herself known to Mysterious Thief Person.
So she decided to take matters into her own hands.
(It was only one person, right? Right. Besides, her scream could wake the entire apartment building up.
...)
"YAHHH!" Kane pounced on the hunched shadow and started hitting him with her Hello Kitty plushie. Mysterious Thief Person screamed, took one look at Kane, and then screamed again.
"Take that! And that! And that, you-"
Kane didn't get to finish her sentence as light, harsh and blinding, bathed the living room. She struggled, arms and feet flailing in the air as someone held her up by the collar. Mysterious Thief Person scrambled to his feet and Kane hurled her plushie, hitting him square in the head with a resounding 'boff'.
"Whoa-whoa, calm down Xena."
Kane would have recognized that voice anywhere. She struggled more vehemently.
"Lemme go! I gotta beat that guy up!"
"With a plushie?" YooChun wrapped his arms around the little girl and pulled her to his chest, afraid for a moment that she'd injure herself with all the wriggling and flailing. Darn, but Little Monster packed a mean throw.
Kane was about to retort when she took in the astonished faces of the older occupants of the house, plus one even more confused (and frightened) middle-aged man. Mysterious Thief Person turned out to be not exactly thief-looking: suit, tie, and all that jazz. Everyone stilled in the room for a precious five seconds.
And then a familiar wail.
JaeJoong was the first to break... well, to be fair, Akira, from his room, was the first to break the silence, but JaeJoong said the first word.
"Hyung?"
*
[ JunSu // Ten seconds, a wailing toddler, and a disgruntled manager later ]
"What is happening here? Who is that little girl? Who is that crying?"
I rubbed the back of my head and grimaced, preparing for our impending chaos. Our manager was red in the face and looked like he was about to go into cardiac arrest. It was customary for our manager to stop by our place (he had a key, but he didn't live with us since he had his own family after all) to drop off our schedule or other notes. What we forgot was to tell Kane about it and...well, we could've avoided this mess.
YunHo-hyung rubbed his temple, probably trying to decide which crisis required his attention most. He finally turned to us.
"Whose turn is it?"
"Whose turn what?" Manager-hyung demanded.
JaeJoong-hyung looked at ChangMin. ChangMin looked at me. I looked at YooChun.
"Occupied." He shrugged and gestured to Kane in his arms. We all knew it was just an excuse to get away from having to deal with Akira's diapers, but none of us was really inclined to point that out-as him releasing Kane might mean Kane going rabid with her plushie again. So we all looked back at ChangMin instead.
...
ChangMin rolled his eyes and grumbled an okay-okay-I'll-do-it before stalking off to the kids' room. Now, we also knew it was just a charade. He probably cared about Akira the most among all of us-not that we didn't care about little Akira, ChangMin just... cared a little more.
"Do what?" TaeKim-hyung asked again.
"Lemme go!"
"Not if you keep on pulling the Korean Hello Kitty Massacre."
Kane glared at YooChun. I cleared my throat.
"Kane-chan, are you hurt?"
"Kane?" she asked, sounding thoroughly offended. "He wuz the one scweamin'!" She jammed her finger towards the general direction of our manager. YunHo-hyung gestured at YooChun to put Kane down and turned to the oldest man in the room.
"...So hyung, why did you scream?"
"I thought she was a ghost!" It was TaeKim-hyung's turn to look offended. "She just attacked me out of nowhere! I thought she was trying to kill me-what was I supposed to do?"
...
Kane frowned. "What did he say?"
"She, uh, hit you with a plushie. Not a frying pan."
"It was dark, okay?"
"Is he talkin 'bout Kane?"
"Kane," YunHo-hyung cleared his throat. "Why did you attack Taekim-hyung? And what were you doing up at this time?"
"'Cause Kane thought he's a thief! Kane was hungwy and he came in and Kane couln't go to yoll woom, so Kane pounced him! And then-and then he started scweamin' like a sissy! And--"
Ghost? Thief? Sissy?
It was seriously getting more absurd by the second. I could see the corners of YunHo-hyung's lips twitching. JaeJoong-hyung hid his face behind YunHo-hyung's shoulder. I fought to keep a straight face, not really knowing how YooChun was reacting because, frankly, I didn't have the guts to look at YooChun. I knew I'd burst out laughing if I so much as glanced at him.
Good thing we sent ChangMin to Akira's room. He would probably be howling with laughter if he was here-which wasn't exactly the wisest thing to do.
YunHo-hyung cleared his throat again. Before he said anything though, ChangMin returned from the second bedroom with Akira giggling and playing with his hair.
"He won't go back to sleep-I think he's hungry." I didn't even realize that we were slowly getting accustomed to using Japanese every time Kane was in the room.
"There are two of them?" Again, with the almost-cardiac-arrest look, "Who are they-your children?" Manager-hyung turned to our leader.
"Yes, mine and JaeJoong's." YunHo-hyung replied with a tone of sarcasm in his voice. "Of course not. What is it with people and me having children?"
"Well, you did say you wanted twenty five children," ChangMin pointed out matter-of-factly. "Wouldn't hurt to assume that you started early."
"She's five."
"And thwee months!"
"Okay. Stop." Manager-hyung demanded, evidently fed up. "Who are they?" He gestured to Akira and Kane. "Whose children are they? Why are they here? And most importantly: why wasn't I informed about any of this?"
We exchanged looks again. Oh well.
We were so in for the scolding of the year.
*
[ ChangMin // Three minutes and a bottle of milk later ]
"AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?"
I winced as manager-hyung's voice raised a good three octaves higher. YunHo-hyung just finished re-telling the short version of how Kane and Akira ended up in our care and as expected; our manager wasn't all sunshine and puppies about it. Akira looked at me all confused and clutched his bottle closer. Kane stood stock still, gripping her plushie, her back rigid. I could see the lines of determination in her face, trying to understand what might have passed between the adults despite how little and how basic the Korean we'd taught her.
"It's okay," I whispered, patting the top of Akira's head gently. "He's not mad at you."
"Well, uh, we were planning to tell you. We just..."
"When? Next year? You've had these kids for almost a week! You're resuming your activities in two days!"
A deafening silence descended upon the room. It was almost scary the way everyone just seemed to stiffen for a fraction of a second-like the lights suddenly went out, leaving you alone and at the same time grasping in the darkness for what-just-happened.
Yeah. Right. Two days and we're going back to Japan.
Without JaeJoong-hyung.
It was almost a taboo subject in the house, the DUI incident. No one asked why JaeJoong-hyung insisted on driving that night. YunHo-hyung had a short talk with JaeJoong-hyung, and that was it. We didn't ask, didn't think we had the right to ask. Perhaps JaeJoong-hyung had problems; perhaps he was simply too foxed to think and stupidly chanced a drive home.
JaeJoong-hyung had his own problems and we respected him enough to let him share when he felt like sharing.
Of course, it came with its own consequence: his activities in Japan were suspended for an indeterminate amount of time.
Not that we wouldn't fly back to Korea once in a while, but it would be... different. Performing without JaeJoong-hyung was something that never crossed my mind ever before, like eating a Korean dinner without KimChee. It just didn't fit.
"I can stay with the kids," JaeJoong-hyung said slowly, after a beat. The tone was a little too calm not to be forced, the smile a little too sweet not to be faked.
Manager-hyung ran his fingers through his disheveled hair and sighed. My heart actually went out a little to him. He had stuck with us since we first debuted and had always been a good manager, fighting for us and all that. He was getting older and his workload probably didn't contribute much to his health.
"That's not even the problem. Does anyone else know about these kids?"
"Only the lawyers," JunSu-hyung provided helpfully, "...and maybe a couple of relatives in Japan. They didn't want-" Pause (thin ice, thin ice-not the wisest thing to say in front of the children). "They released custody of the children."
If it were possible, manager-hyung looked more stricken.
"...to you."
"Well, to YunHo-hyung and JaeJoong-hyung, actually."
"That's not better!"
I bit my lip when Akira whimpered. He looked just about ready to cry, so I stood up, plastered a million-dollar smile on my face, and said the first thing that came up on my mind.
"You know what would be better?" Um. Um. Food! "...Escargot!"
...
I could immediately tell how lame that sounded from the silence that followed.
That was the downside of relying on your overtired brain to come up with something at two in the morning. Under pressure. Half the occupants (i.e. manager-hyung, YunHo-hyung, JaeJoong-hyung, and JunSu) in the room gave me a blank look; the other half (...only YooChun-hyung and Kane-chan, really) looked at me as if I just declared I wanted to go down to the streets, start a fire, and dance to Hi Ya Ya Yorumnal naked.
...I shouldn't have read that book about France earlier this evening.
"Did you just say 'Escargot'?"
"Esca-what?"
"...And where do you think we could find that at this hour?"
"Pretty sure I can try to make them, actually, we just don't have-"
"That was supposed to be rhetorical, hyung."
"What's an 'esker-go'?"
"Why d'you wanna eat snails?"
"Did she just say snails?"
Someone emitted a high-pitched squeal.
"...We're talking about snails, not whales."
"...I was trying to do a dolphin?"
Pause. "Whatever. They sound the same."
"No, they don't."
"Do too."
"Do not!"
"Guys-"
"Do too! Shut up."
"No you!"
"You!"
"Why are we talking about whales?"
"SNAILS." That one was a chorus.
...
Akira clapped his hands and giggled.
For some reason that I would never know why (maybe because we were a bunch of guys with undiagnosed Stage Five Attention Deficit Disorder), that seemed to lighten up the mood. At least manager-hyung wasn't doing a poor Luciano Pavarotti impression anymore. He sat there with his shoulders hunched, wearing a familiar expression of 'I give up'. I was a bit ashamed to admit that we made him wear that expression quite a lot.
"How long are you planning to keep these kids with you?"
As long as p-whoa there. My mind backpedaled so fast it could've ended up back in ChungNam. Where did that come from anyway? Of course the kids couldn't stay with us forever-which saddened me, I realized with surprise-they needed a proper home, parents, education. What do we know about taking care of kids? We are kids ourselves. What about the management? The media? Lee sunsaengnim?
(Later on, when I looked back on this moment, I would remember the collective expression of sorrow that appeared on hyung-deul's faces.)
"We'll start looking up foster parents as soon as possible," YunHo-hyung finally replied, after a heavy pause. TaeKim-hyung looked at us for a moment, sighed, and nodded. He stood up and straightened his suit, ready to go home.
"Whoever asks," he concluded with a resolute tone even YunHo-hyung couldn't argue with, "they are kids of JaeJoong's family friend and you are just taking care of them temporarily." And that was that. He motioned for the two eldest members to walk with him and they left discussing quietly about something none of us were inclined to ask about. I guess it was natural, since JaeJoong-hyung and YunHo-hyung were the appointed legal guardians of the kids.
Kane sniffed a little. I turned to look at her. Again, whoever said that kids were sensitive to mood changes should've said 'extremely sensitive'-especially in special cases like Kane's. I didn't doubt for a second that she understood (although just vaguely) what just went on.
It all came down to just one point: they weren't going to stay here long.
I swallowed. Kane clutched her plushie tighter. She wasn't going to cry, though, I could see that. Before I could say anything, JunSu squatted down in front of Kane and ruffled her hair gently.
"Still hungry? We can eat ChangMinnie's Gummi Bears," he smiled. "And you won't have to brush your teeth after."
I didn't have any willpower to protest.
*
[ YunHo // As JunSu was squatting down and whispering something to Kane ]
"You know you'll have to relinquish your guardianship of these kids."
Something stuck in my throat when I tried to reply and I recognized that as sadness. Yes, we understood. They were our responsibilities but we still had other responsibilities-more important responsibilities. And taking care of kids wasn't in the list.
"Actually, we can keep them," JaeJoong said quietly. "You know that." He looked at me, then, inviting me to assume my position as a reasonable leader and refute his point, expecting me to be rational, as usual.
I didn't feel like it, for once, and I could feel JaeJoong's surprise to that small rebellion. I smiled back, albeit weakly.
Manager-hyung sighed and rubbed his temple.
"Yes, if I manage to convince Lee sunsaengnim," he grimaced. "I think I ought to wear a helmet, don't you?"
He didn't expect us to answer, apparently; he just bid his farewell and exited the apartment quietly. I glanced at the clock on the wall-almost three in the morning. This is the second night in a week we stayed up late.
I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed again.
Needing the quiet, unquestioning support, I let JaeJoong slip his arm around my waist and lead me back to the living room. I swept a tired pair of eyes at the faces waiting for us in the living room. ChangMin was cradling and humming something to Akira, curled up in deep slumber in his arms. JunSu and Kane-chan were sharing a pack of ChangMin's Gummi Bears. YooChun looked at JaeJoong and me, and offered his famous half-smile.
I was reminded again why I worked so hard for these guys.
"Let's go back to bed." As they scrambled to their feet, I noticed that ChangMin seemed reluctant to let Akira go. JunSu messed Kane's hair once more and watched-with the rest of us-her walk limply to her bedroom.
There weren't too many things that beat a sad little girl in the breaking-your-heart department, really.
I looked at my housemates and shrugged. Didn't think they'd argue with me at this point.
"Kane-chan?" Little Kane stopped and turned. "Wanna sleep with us tonight?"
(ChangMin looked more excited than her.)
*
[ Maybe Forever ]
It began with six long notes produced by an instrument he couldn't quite name-perhaps a harpsichord or a church organ, perhaps a machine-modified melody. Then Matt Hales waltzed in with a simple chord or two, so quiet in his steps that you almost couldn't feel the transition.
( 'A kiss is not just a kiss.
A smile is more than a smile.
Maybe we'll get together, maybe forever...
Maybe just for a while.' )
It wasn't YooChun's favorite song, but he liked it enough to keep it in his mp3 folder-how someone could sing with the monotony of a background singer (smooth, quiet, and always with the subtlest climax) and still keep his listeners captivated (or was it only him?).
Aqualung was petrified, hypnotized, and JunSu popped his head into the workroom.
"We're sleeping soon. They told me to get you." But he still walked in, pulled a chair and sat down, his arms on the back of YooChun's chair, his chin on YooChun's shoulder, his eyes scanning the scrolling Google screen in front of them. Encarta. Oceanic. Mammals. "What are you doing?"
( 'Darling everyday I think of you, I can't believe it's true,
That you're here by my side.' )
"Looking for whale sound clips."
[ Maybe Just For A While ]
When JunSu and YooChun finally agreed that whales and dolphins sounded different, everyone had long given up waiting for them.
That, however, wasn't the reason why JunSu and YooChun smiled.
The only bed that was occupied in that room was YunHo's double bed-YunHo and Jaejoong lying aligned with the headboard with Kane nestled between them, clutching her Hello Kitty plushie. ChangMin lay across at the end of the bed with one arm cushioning his head and another holding a drooling Akira near his chest.
JunSu and YooChun worked in silent agreement; they moved the nightstand separating YunHo and JunSu's bed to the middle of the room and moved JunSu's bed right next to the double bed. There were hushed arguments and a little shuffling on who got to lay on the slight crack separating the two beds, but it was safe to say that everyone was fast asleep in two minutes.
For a short while, that was enough.
*
(...
JunSu agreed to sleep with a tiny discomfort between JaeJoong and YooChun-he knew he would end up using YooChun as a pillow anyway-in exchange for the older boy helping him learn how to make whale sounds.)
*
Author: catachrestical
Keywords: Bandfic; hints of JaeHo and YooSu; some original characters.
Rating: PG13 for few language mishaps.
Disclaimer: Do not own, did not happen.
Notes:The boys found themselves having to take care of two orphan kids.
First version beta'd by janeberryblue; current version re-beta'd by bel_chan ♥
Thanks for reading :)
*
→ previous: #1 | #2 | #3 | #4
Our Little Princess
Chapter 5: Maybe We'll Get Together
"Maybe we'll get together, maybe forever,
...maybe just for a while."
- Aqualung, Can't Get You Out Of My Mind.
The clock chimed two times.
The silver moon peeked from the small window above the sink. Bare feet sounded on the marble floor; gentle, quiet, almost apologetic in the way they were disrupting the peace of the night. A shadow hesitated a little near the hallway connecting bedrooms and living room, hesitated a little more at the junction connecting living room and dining room-as if with each distance she gained, darkness would shift and turn itself into something untouchable, implausible; something Kane was really scared of.
Arisugawa Kane hated darkness, but more than that, she hated admitting that she hated darkness.
She supposed she could turn the lights on-oh, right, she forgot she was short and six years old. Why did people put light switches so high on the wall anyway?
Her stomach growled and she jumped (again). Kane cursed a certain nii-san for stealing a piece of her bulgogi at dinner and quickened her steps. The target was clear: the pack of Gummi Bears on the kitchen counter. There was a post-it-note with neat handwriting scrawled on it that said: 'Property of Max ChangMin. Trespassers will be punished!!! >:|', with big bold letters and an emoticon for emphasis.
Like everyone else in the house, Kane had learned to ignore the note. She climbed up a stool and was reaching for it when the front door opened. Her hands stilled; her eyes widened.
Who could it be? Everyone had long gone to sleep! Was it a ghost? No, no, ghosts didn't open doors, they walked through them!
...Wait. That could only mean...
Clutching her Hello Kitty plushie tight (a gift from a fan JunSu nii-san didn't know what to do with) to her chest, Kane climbed down the stool soundlessly and crept along the walls leading to the living room. She was right. There was a person, whose face she couldn't see, and he was walking-tiptoeing-to the living room with something in his hand.
Thief!
Kane inched closer-before realizing that there was no way she could reach the master bedroom without making herself known to Mysterious Thief Person.
So she decided to take matters into her own hands.
(It was only one person, right? Right. Besides, her scream could wake the entire apartment building up.
...)
"YAHHH!" Kane pounced on the hunched shadow and started hitting him with her Hello Kitty plushie. Mysterious Thief Person screamed, took one look at Kane, and then screamed again.
"Take that! And that! And that, you-"
Kane didn't get to finish her sentence as light, harsh and blinding, bathed the living room. She struggled, arms and feet flailing in the air as someone held her up by the collar. Mysterious Thief Person scrambled to his feet and Kane hurled her plushie, hitting him square in the head with a resounding 'boff'.
"Whoa-whoa, calm down Xena."
Kane would have recognized that voice anywhere. She struggled more vehemently.
"Lemme go! I gotta beat that guy up!"
"With a plushie?" YooChun wrapped his arms around the little girl and pulled her to his chest, afraid for a moment that she'd injure herself with all the wriggling and flailing. Darn, but Little Monster packed a mean throw.
Kane was about to retort when she took in the astonished faces of the older occupants of the house, plus one even more confused (and frightened) middle-aged man. Mysterious Thief Person turned out to be not exactly thief-looking: suit, tie, and all that jazz. Everyone stilled in the room for a precious five seconds.
And then a familiar wail.
JaeJoong was the first to break... well, to be fair, Akira, from his room, was the first to break the silence, but JaeJoong said the first word.
"Hyung?"
*
[ JunSu // Ten seconds, a wailing toddler, and a disgruntled manager later ]
"What is happening here? Who is that little girl? Who is that crying?"
I rubbed the back of my head and grimaced, preparing for our impending chaos. Our manager was red in the face and looked like he was about to go into cardiac arrest. It was customary for our manager to stop by our place (he had a key, but he didn't live with us since he had his own family after all) to drop off our schedule or other notes. What we forgot was to tell Kane about it and...well, we could've avoided this mess.
YunHo-hyung rubbed his temple, probably trying to decide which crisis required his attention most. He finally turned to us.
"Whose turn is it?"
"Whose turn what?" Manager-hyung demanded.
JaeJoong-hyung looked at ChangMin. ChangMin looked at me. I looked at YooChun.
"Occupied." He shrugged and gestured to Kane in his arms. We all knew it was just an excuse to get away from having to deal with Akira's diapers, but none of us was really inclined to point that out-as him releasing Kane might mean Kane going rabid with her plushie again. So we all looked back at ChangMin instead.
...
ChangMin rolled his eyes and grumbled an okay-okay-I'll-do-it before stalking off to the kids' room. Now, we also knew it was just a charade. He probably cared about Akira the most among all of us-not that we didn't care about little Akira, ChangMin just... cared a little more.
"Do what?" TaeKim-hyung asked again.
"Lemme go!"
"Not if you keep on pulling the Korean Hello Kitty Massacre."
Kane glared at YooChun. I cleared my throat.
"Kane-chan, are you hurt?"
"Kane?" she asked, sounding thoroughly offended. "He wuz the one scweamin'!" She jammed her finger towards the general direction of our manager. YunHo-hyung gestured at YooChun to put Kane down and turned to the oldest man in the room.
"...So hyung, why did you scream?"
"I thought she was a ghost!" It was TaeKim-hyung's turn to look offended. "She just attacked me out of nowhere! I thought she was trying to kill me-what was I supposed to do?"
...
Kane frowned. "What did he say?"
"She, uh, hit you with a plushie. Not a frying pan."
"It was dark, okay?"
"Is he talkin 'bout Kane?"
"Kane," YunHo-hyung cleared his throat. "Why did you attack Taekim-hyung? And what were you doing up at this time?"
"'Cause Kane thought he's a thief! Kane was hungwy and he came in and Kane couln't go to yoll woom, so Kane pounced him! And then-and then he started scweamin' like a sissy! And--"
Ghost? Thief? Sissy?
It was seriously getting more absurd by the second. I could see the corners of YunHo-hyung's lips twitching. JaeJoong-hyung hid his face behind YunHo-hyung's shoulder. I fought to keep a straight face, not really knowing how YooChun was reacting because, frankly, I didn't have the guts to look at YooChun. I knew I'd burst out laughing if I so much as glanced at him.
Good thing we sent ChangMin to Akira's room. He would probably be howling with laughter if he was here-which wasn't exactly the wisest thing to do.
YunHo-hyung cleared his throat again. Before he said anything though, ChangMin returned from the second bedroom with Akira giggling and playing with his hair.
"He won't go back to sleep-I think he's hungry." I didn't even realize that we were slowly getting accustomed to using Japanese every time Kane was in the room.
"There are two of them?" Again, with the almost-cardiac-arrest look, "Who are they-your children?" Manager-hyung turned to our leader.
"Yes, mine and JaeJoong's." YunHo-hyung replied with a tone of sarcasm in his voice. "Of course not. What is it with people and me having children?"
"Well, you did say you wanted twenty five children," ChangMin pointed out matter-of-factly. "Wouldn't hurt to assume that you started early."
"She's five."
"And thwee months!"
"Okay. Stop." Manager-hyung demanded, evidently fed up. "Who are they?" He gestured to Akira and Kane. "Whose children are they? Why are they here? And most importantly: why wasn't I informed about any of this?"
We exchanged looks again. Oh well.
We were so in for the scolding of the year.
*
[ ChangMin // Three minutes and a bottle of milk later ]
"AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?"
I winced as manager-hyung's voice raised a good three octaves higher. YunHo-hyung just finished re-telling the short version of how Kane and Akira ended up in our care and as expected; our manager wasn't all sunshine and puppies about it. Akira looked at me all confused and clutched his bottle closer. Kane stood stock still, gripping her plushie, her back rigid. I could see the lines of determination in her face, trying to understand what might have passed between the adults despite how little and how basic the Korean we'd taught her.
"It's okay," I whispered, patting the top of Akira's head gently. "He's not mad at you."
"Well, uh, we were planning to tell you. We just..."
"When? Next year? You've had these kids for almost a week! You're resuming your activities in two days!"
A deafening silence descended upon the room. It was almost scary the way everyone just seemed to stiffen for a fraction of a second-like the lights suddenly went out, leaving you alone and at the same time grasping in the darkness for what-just-happened.
Yeah. Right. Two days and we're going back to Japan.
Without JaeJoong-hyung.
It was almost a taboo subject in the house, the DUI incident. No one asked why JaeJoong-hyung insisted on driving that night. YunHo-hyung had a short talk with JaeJoong-hyung, and that was it. We didn't ask, didn't think we had the right to ask. Perhaps JaeJoong-hyung had problems; perhaps he was simply too foxed to think and stupidly chanced a drive home.
JaeJoong-hyung had his own problems and we respected him enough to let him share when he felt like sharing.
Of course, it came with its own consequence: his activities in Japan were suspended for an indeterminate amount of time.
Not that we wouldn't fly back to Korea once in a while, but it would be... different. Performing without JaeJoong-hyung was something that never crossed my mind ever before, like eating a Korean dinner without KimChee. It just didn't fit.
"I can stay with the kids," JaeJoong-hyung said slowly, after a beat. The tone was a little too calm not to be forced, the smile a little too sweet not to be faked.
Manager-hyung ran his fingers through his disheveled hair and sighed. My heart actually went out a little to him. He had stuck with us since we first debuted and had always been a good manager, fighting for us and all that. He was getting older and his workload probably didn't contribute much to his health.
"That's not even the problem. Does anyone else know about these kids?"
"Only the lawyers," JunSu-hyung provided helpfully, "...and maybe a couple of relatives in Japan. They didn't want-" Pause (thin ice, thin ice-not the wisest thing to say in front of the children). "They released custody of the children."
If it were possible, manager-hyung looked more stricken.
"...to you."
"Well, to YunHo-hyung and JaeJoong-hyung, actually."
"That's not better!"
I bit my lip when Akira whimpered. He looked just about ready to cry, so I stood up, plastered a million-dollar smile on my face, and said the first thing that came up on my mind.
"You know what would be better?" Um. Um. Food! "...Escargot!"
...
I could immediately tell how lame that sounded from the silence that followed.
That was the downside of relying on your overtired brain to come up with something at two in the morning. Under pressure. Half the occupants (i.e. manager-hyung, YunHo-hyung, JaeJoong-hyung, and JunSu) in the room gave me a blank look; the other half (...only YooChun-hyung and Kane-chan, really) looked at me as if I just declared I wanted to go down to the streets, start a fire, and dance to Hi Ya Ya Yorumnal naked.
...I shouldn't have read that book about France earlier this evening.
"Did you just say 'Escargot'?"
"Esca-what?"
"...And where do you think we could find that at this hour?"
"Pretty sure I can try to make them, actually, we just don't have-"
"That was supposed to be rhetorical, hyung."
"What's an 'esker-go'?"
"Why d'you wanna eat snails?"
"Did she just say snails?"
Someone emitted a high-pitched squeal.
"...We're talking about snails, not whales."
"...I was trying to do a dolphin?"
Pause. "Whatever. They sound the same."
"No, they don't."
"Do too."
"Do not!"
"Guys-"
"Do too! Shut up."
"No you!"
"You!"
"Why are we talking about whales?"
"SNAILS." That one was a chorus.
...
Akira clapped his hands and giggled.
For some reason that I would never know why (maybe because we were a bunch of guys with undiagnosed Stage Five Attention Deficit Disorder), that seemed to lighten up the mood. At least manager-hyung wasn't doing a poor Luciano Pavarotti impression anymore. He sat there with his shoulders hunched, wearing a familiar expression of 'I give up'. I was a bit ashamed to admit that we made him wear that expression quite a lot.
"How long are you planning to keep these kids with you?"
As long as p-whoa there. My mind backpedaled so fast it could've ended up back in ChungNam. Where did that come from anyway? Of course the kids couldn't stay with us forever-which saddened me, I realized with surprise-they needed a proper home, parents, education. What do we know about taking care of kids? We are kids ourselves. What about the management? The media? Lee sunsaengnim?
(Later on, when I looked back on this moment, I would remember the collective expression of sorrow that appeared on hyung-deul's faces.)
"We'll start looking up foster parents as soon as possible," YunHo-hyung finally replied, after a heavy pause. TaeKim-hyung looked at us for a moment, sighed, and nodded. He stood up and straightened his suit, ready to go home.
"Whoever asks," he concluded with a resolute tone even YunHo-hyung couldn't argue with, "they are kids of JaeJoong's family friend and you are just taking care of them temporarily." And that was that. He motioned for the two eldest members to walk with him and they left discussing quietly about something none of us were inclined to ask about. I guess it was natural, since JaeJoong-hyung and YunHo-hyung were the appointed legal guardians of the kids.
Kane sniffed a little. I turned to look at her. Again, whoever said that kids were sensitive to mood changes should've said 'extremely sensitive'-especially in special cases like Kane's. I didn't doubt for a second that she understood (although just vaguely) what just went on.
It all came down to just one point: they weren't going to stay here long.
I swallowed. Kane clutched her plushie tighter. She wasn't going to cry, though, I could see that. Before I could say anything, JunSu squatted down in front of Kane and ruffled her hair gently.
"Still hungry? We can eat ChangMinnie's Gummi Bears," he smiled. "And you won't have to brush your teeth after."
I didn't have any willpower to protest.
*
[ YunHo // As JunSu was squatting down and whispering something to Kane ]
"You know you'll have to relinquish your guardianship of these kids."
Something stuck in my throat when I tried to reply and I recognized that as sadness. Yes, we understood. They were our responsibilities but we still had other responsibilities-more important responsibilities. And taking care of kids wasn't in the list.
"Actually, we can keep them," JaeJoong said quietly. "You know that." He looked at me, then, inviting me to assume my position as a reasonable leader and refute his point, expecting me to be rational, as usual.
I didn't feel like it, for once, and I could feel JaeJoong's surprise to that small rebellion. I smiled back, albeit weakly.
Manager-hyung sighed and rubbed his temple.
"Yes, if I manage to convince Lee sunsaengnim," he grimaced. "I think I ought to wear a helmet, don't you?"
He didn't expect us to answer, apparently; he just bid his farewell and exited the apartment quietly. I glanced at the clock on the wall-almost three in the morning. This is the second night in a week we stayed up late.
I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed again.
Needing the quiet, unquestioning support, I let JaeJoong slip his arm around my waist and lead me back to the living room. I swept a tired pair of eyes at the faces waiting for us in the living room. ChangMin was cradling and humming something to Akira, curled up in deep slumber in his arms. JunSu and Kane-chan were sharing a pack of ChangMin's Gummi Bears. YooChun looked at JaeJoong and me, and offered his famous half-smile.
I was reminded again why I worked so hard for these guys.
"Let's go back to bed." As they scrambled to their feet, I noticed that ChangMin seemed reluctant to let Akira go. JunSu messed Kane's hair once more and watched-with the rest of us-her walk limply to her bedroom.
There weren't too many things that beat a sad little girl in the breaking-your-heart department, really.
I looked at my housemates and shrugged. Didn't think they'd argue with me at this point.
"Kane-chan?" Little Kane stopped and turned. "Wanna sleep with us tonight?"
(ChangMin looked more excited than her.)
*
[ Maybe Forever ]
It began with six long notes produced by an instrument he couldn't quite name-perhaps a harpsichord or a church organ, perhaps a machine-modified melody. Then Matt Hales waltzed in with a simple chord or two, so quiet in his steps that you almost couldn't feel the transition.
( 'A kiss is not just a kiss.
A smile is more than a smile.
Maybe we'll get together, maybe forever...
Maybe just for a while.' )
It wasn't YooChun's favorite song, but he liked it enough to keep it in his mp3 folder-how someone could sing with the monotony of a background singer (smooth, quiet, and always with the subtlest climax) and still keep his listeners captivated (or was it only him?).
Aqualung was petrified, hypnotized, and JunSu popped his head into the workroom.
"We're sleeping soon. They told me to get you." But he still walked in, pulled a chair and sat down, his arms on the back of YooChun's chair, his chin on YooChun's shoulder, his eyes scanning the scrolling Google screen in front of them. Encarta. Oceanic. Mammals. "What are you doing?"
( 'Darling everyday I think of you, I can't believe it's true,
That you're here by my side.' )
"Looking for whale sound clips."
[ Maybe Just For A While ]
When JunSu and YooChun finally agreed that whales and dolphins sounded different, everyone had long given up waiting for them.
That, however, wasn't the reason why JunSu and YooChun smiled.
The only bed that was occupied in that room was YunHo's double bed-YunHo and Jaejoong lying aligned with the headboard with Kane nestled between them, clutching her Hello Kitty plushie. ChangMin lay across at the end of the bed with one arm cushioning his head and another holding a drooling Akira near his chest.
JunSu and YooChun worked in silent agreement; they moved the nightstand separating YunHo and JunSu's bed to the middle of the room and moved JunSu's bed right next to the double bed. There were hushed arguments and a little shuffling on who got to lay on the slight crack separating the two beds, but it was safe to say that everyone was fast asleep in two minutes.
For a short while, that was enough.
*
(...
JunSu agreed to sleep with a tiny discomfort between JaeJoong and YooChun-he knew he would end up using YooChun as a pillow anyway-in exchange for the older boy helping him learn how to make whale sounds.)
*