Kaze Wo Astumete!
"You're such a complex person...I...I don't think people will accept
you without credibilty..."
-Claudia McCotter (2003)
Before I walk out the door, I attempt to poor mint listerine in my mouth but accidently splash it up my nose. Strangly the scent takes me back to the subway in New York, and I can hear the couple argue and the crazy man preach against the end of the world...but the world did end. You don't remember? We aren't living anymore, this is a relapse, a copy...
* You can't write anymore can you? That's why you waste our time with the most bizarre, complex shit.
CLOSING ACT: THE RAVE
WINDY: ...so basically that's when I realized my life will never be complete. There's no hope really, we're stuck like hamsters running towards the illusion of success. Damn where's my purple lighter? Well anyway honey, I hope you understand that love isn't for everyone. When your young, it's like getting your first Christmas present, and you want another one, but eventually you realize it's never going to be different. Love is flat out redundant, and to be quit honest I think it's the ugliest of the four letter words. "Fuck" is so much more passionate to me. If that guy over there in the tight black jeans came over here and told me he wanted to fuck me, I would melt and feel like the luckiest girl in the world.
JESSICA: But Ryan wasn't always this shallow. When we talk now I can still feel under his crips violent voice, a soft romantic boy who use to last piece of raisn bread for me, and wrote me the most enchanting love songs...
WINDY: Honey, it's NEVER going to be the same. Just accept it, move one and find another penis..er um guy to have fun with. They all start out intresting, and nice. If you go in knowning, not thinking that the guy will end up being a phoney, than nothing can hurt you.
JESSICA: Everytime I see another guy I might like, I think about Ryan, and even though we've been apart for over 13 months, I feel like I'm cheating on him if I go for it.
WINDY: HAHa. Jessy, you always know how to make me giggle inside...God. Look he's out there fucking every woman he can touch, and your still worried about his feelings? Masacism isn't love sweety.
*ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...oh are you still writing? my bad.
80% of male panda bears are impotent. The species is in danger. But if the female pandas actually had a choice they would go for the mountain grizzly bear. He never fails to satisfy.
*What the fuck?
She whore purple velvet around her soft brown sugar waste. I could taste her chocolate lips from across the room. When we passed eachother it felt like a dream..
* hahahah You aint Barry White...stop..you're killing me! ahhaahaha
Okay look I'm trying, I can't write anything! If you keep mocking me, I'm leaving!
*Oh don't tease me please. Just give up man..the sandman has come, and he's litterally begging you to get off stage, he's willing to suck your dick, pay your cell phone bill, just get off!
I'm not listening to you, this isn't real. I can still write, just give me a chance.
Okay? umm...what's your next piece of shi..er um "story":)?
Um...it's about ... a manically depressed comedian, who wants rejection and pain from woman to be funny again, so he goes on dates and purposely gets woman to hate him...
*Don't tell me SHOW me casaNEVER!
Okay...wegferg
LAUGHING ON THE REBOUND: scene 3(airport)
Ricky shops for soy milk at a run down Quick Stop. The radio plays the song I Swear by All4One.
RICKY: I know this a little to much to ask, but could you please change that song. I don't want to listen to any romance music now, especially bad ones.
MANAGER: Excuse me?
RICKY: I just would like to shop in peace, my mind is about to exploid into jello, please.
MANAGER: Oh you had a bad day...okay. Can you come closer I have something to tell you.
RICKY: No! You're going to hit me, and then tell me to fuck off! Well not this time! Guess what I don't fucking care if this is your shop! Uh-uh, I spend my money so I can come in and buy a mediocer product that's overppriced and probably made in some foreign country by slaves.
MANAGER: What's her name?
RICKY: Fuck you! THat's her name. Last name You, first name Fuck. Get it? oh you're not laughing, well that's also something else I don't care about! I'm tired of wasting my time to make people laugh, the audience is different every single fucking show, so why should I suck up to you huh?
Ricky starts to pick up candy bars and sodas and throw them on the counter. The manager stairs bankly at Ricky, as he continues to rant.
RICKY: Look at this shit. You're trying to kill us. We live in run down smogy cities, that poison our lungs, we have to listen to the worst fucking music, at least have something healthy for me to eat. I bet you don't have any veggie sandwiches do you?
MANAGER: Nope.
RICKY: Knew it! You hypocritical moron! Why don't we all just find stray cats and dogs and make burgers, I mean it would be the same thing, right? Oh I'm sorry, I noticed you have a little poodle behind the counter...well too bad, cause he's my supper. hahaha. Don't even get me started on the prices! So don't tell me I've had a "bad day" fucker! My day has just started. Oh look, it's your lottery tickets. Can't get enough of our money...why not try rapping our fantasies...She always thought the lottery was real. I've probably spent over $700 on these tickets. Then when she wouldn't get the numbers right, she'd blame it on me. She picked our anniversary once, and said that if we won it would mean we were meant to be together..well guess what? I FUCKING LOST....Ah.....
Ricky is hit on the head with an umbrella by an old woman, and knocked out.
OLD WOMAN: I'm sorry I just couldn't listen to his voice anymore. This neighborhood is full of wackos. The bastard should be out for until the police get here. I thought he was going to shoot you. Oh is this detergent on sale?
MANAGER: No ma'am but if you buy two I can cut the price down.
OLD WOMAN: Thank you sweety.
end scene.
*ummm....I can't fix this man..oh look Conan's on :)
you without credibilty..."
-Claudia McCotter (2003)
Before I walk out the door, I attempt to poor mint listerine in my mouth but accidently splash it up my nose. Strangly the scent takes me back to the subway in New York, and I can hear the couple argue and the crazy man preach against the end of the world...but the world did end. You don't remember? We aren't living anymore, this is a relapse, a copy...
* You can't write anymore can you? That's why you waste our time with the most bizarre, complex shit.
CLOSING ACT: THE RAVE
WINDY: ...so basically that's when I realized my life will never be complete. There's no hope really, we're stuck like hamsters running towards the illusion of success. Damn where's my purple lighter? Well anyway honey, I hope you understand that love isn't for everyone. When your young, it's like getting your first Christmas present, and you want another one, but eventually you realize it's never going to be different. Love is flat out redundant, and to be quit honest I think it's the ugliest of the four letter words. "Fuck" is so much more passionate to me. If that guy over there in the tight black jeans came over here and told me he wanted to fuck me, I would melt and feel like the luckiest girl in the world.
JESSICA: But Ryan wasn't always this shallow. When we talk now I can still feel under his crips violent voice, a soft romantic boy who use to last piece of raisn bread for me, and wrote me the most enchanting love songs...
WINDY: Honey, it's NEVER going to be the same. Just accept it, move one and find another penis..er um guy to have fun with. They all start out intresting, and nice. If you go in knowning, not thinking that the guy will end up being a phoney, than nothing can hurt you.
JESSICA: Everytime I see another guy I might like, I think about Ryan, and even though we've been apart for over 13 months, I feel like I'm cheating on him if I go for it.
WINDY: HAHa. Jessy, you always know how to make me giggle inside...God. Look he's out there fucking every woman he can touch, and your still worried about his feelings? Masacism isn't love sweety.
*ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...oh are you still writing? my bad.
80% of male panda bears are impotent. The species is in danger. But if the female pandas actually had a choice they would go for the mountain grizzly bear. He never fails to satisfy.
*What the fuck?
She whore purple velvet around her soft brown sugar waste. I could taste her chocolate lips from across the room. When we passed eachother it felt like a dream..
* hahahah You aint Barry White...stop..you're killing me! ahhaahaha
Okay look I'm trying, I can't write anything! If you keep mocking me, I'm leaving!
*Oh don't tease me please. Just give up man..the sandman has come, and he's litterally begging you to get off stage, he's willing to suck your dick, pay your cell phone bill, just get off!
I'm not listening to you, this isn't real. I can still write, just give me a chance.
Okay? umm...what's your next piece of shi..er um "story":)?
Um...it's about ... a manically depressed comedian, who wants rejection and pain from woman to be funny again, so he goes on dates and purposely gets woman to hate him...
*Don't tell me SHOW me casaNEVER!
Okay...wegferg
LAUGHING ON THE REBOUND: scene 3(airport)
Ricky shops for soy milk at a run down Quick Stop. The radio plays the song I Swear by All4One.
RICKY: I know this a little to much to ask, but could you please change that song. I don't want to listen to any romance music now, especially bad ones.
MANAGER: Excuse me?
RICKY: I just would like to shop in peace, my mind is about to exploid into jello, please.
MANAGER: Oh you had a bad day...okay. Can you come closer I have something to tell you.
RICKY: No! You're going to hit me, and then tell me to fuck off! Well not this time! Guess what I don't fucking care if this is your shop! Uh-uh, I spend my money so I can come in and buy a mediocer product that's overppriced and probably made in some foreign country by slaves.
MANAGER: What's her name?
RICKY: Fuck you! THat's her name. Last name You, first name Fuck. Get it? oh you're not laughing, well that's also something else I don't care about! I'm tired of wasting my time to make people laugh, the audience is different every single fucking show, so why should I suck up to you huh?
Ricky starts to pick up candy bars and sodas and throw them on the counter. The manager stairs bankly at Ricky, as he continues to rant.
RICKY: Look at this shit. You're trying to kill us. We live in run down smogy cities, that poison our lungs, we have to listen to the worst fucking music, at least have something healthy for me to eat. I bet you don't have any veggie sandwiches do you?
MANAGER: Nope.
RICKY: Knew it! You hypocritical moron! Why don't we all just find stray cats and dogs and make burgers, I mean it would be the same thing, right? Oh I'm sorry, I noticed you have a little poodle behind the counter...well too bad, cause he's my supper. hahaha. Don't even get me started on the prices! So don't tell me I've had a "bad day" fucker! My day has just started. Oh look, it's your lottery tickets. Can't get enough of our money...why not try rapping our fantasies...She always thought the lottery was real. I've probably spent over $700 on these tickets. Then when she wouldn't get the numbers right, she'd blame it on me. She picked our anniversary once, and said that if we won it would mean we were meant to be together..well guess what? I FUCKING LOST....Ah.....
Ricky is hit on the head with an umbrella by an old woman, and knocked out.
OLD WOMAN: I'm sorry I just couldn't listen to his voice anymore. This neighborhood is full of wackos. The bastard should be out for until the police get here. I thought he was going to shoot you. Oh is this detergent on sale?
MANAGER: No ma'am but if you buy two I can cut the price down.
OLD WOMAN: Thank you sweety.
end scene.
*ummm....I can't fix this man..oh look Conan's on :)