this is my apology for ever letting you leave..
i haven't had dreams in so long, i haven't disliked anything with such a passion, i haven't longed to be somewhere else ever...until now.
i wanna dance in the breeze, and i wanna feel everything around me. i wanna see candy striped butterflies, and sugar soaked skies. i think sometimes i am too much of a free spirit.
i went to will's house earlier. we were gonna have a bon fire, but the wind started to pick up, and it just got to be too much. we rented "passion of the Christ" instead. i've probably never cried about a movie as much as i did tonite. you'd never realized how much Jesus went through to save us from our sins. it's heart wrenching. the worst part was when Mary was having flashbacks about Jesus as a child, and how he fell..tears really were going then.
i was watching will play with cameron, and it kinda pulled on my heart a little. he is so sweet to his baby cousin, it almost wanted to make me cry. i love you william. <3
my sisters finally start school tomorrow. i can't wait. it's about time they get outta my hair. blah.
i have class at 6pm tomorrow. but it's ok, cause i have it with steve. <3 way back when..we used to hate each other sooo much. prolly when we were sophomores or something- but that was a long time ago...i wouldn't trade him for anything. cole and i are having dinner at his dorm tomorrow around 9ish or so..whenever i get outta class.
speaking of cole...i've been kinda loving him the most lately. there's something about him that drives me crazy..and other times he's just my friend...i dunno. i'm afraid to say anything.
i have this love/hate relationship thing going on with work..and i dunno how i feel about it. too many people die..it's so depressing.
there's this cute boy that i work with. i think his name is scott. i saw him in between classes the other day at college. it made me happy.
my birthday is in 13 days. i'll be 19.
this isn't my home yet. i still live in the ugliness of closed minds. people here love to settle for being mediocre, they live for the desire to not live. they sit and sleep and their minds have long stopped dreaming of the world, with its elegance and enthusiasm, its color and energy. no one here has any energy to be anyone but the person everyone expected.
I never wanna grow up. ever.
maybe i'll add more interesting things later. i'm too tired to think.