When to Lay Down the Pen
Originally published at tansyrr.com. You can comment here or there.
Maggie Stiefvater blogged a little while back about time management, and particularly how it’s possible to juggle writing with parenthood. I never know what to say when people comment on how I write books while I have small children to look after. On the one hand, I’m constantly thinking of my failings, of the long gap between books, of how long it has taken me to get here. On the other, I don’t want to sound flippant, or imply that anyone can do it, that there’s anything particularly special about me. I don’t want to sound all judgy about anyone who does find it impossible. Some days it is impossible, and who am I to say what someone else’s possibility looks like?
What I should say, but never think of at the time, is this: it’s hard work. Raising children is hard work. Balancing any kind of paid work with raising children is bloody hard work. I’ve learned a lot about my writing over the last five years since my first child was born. I’ve learned not to be precious about how and where I write. I’ve learned how to get it done, one achievable goal at a time. I’ve made it to a really important rung on the ladder - selling books to publishers - and am working very hard on the next one - writing books to deadline.
As Maggie says, having children isn’t an excuse not to write. I’d like to add that it can be, however, a very valid reason, whether you’re talking about five years or two weeks. This is particularly pertinent to me because the school holidays started today.
Some of you have heard this song before! I seem to talk more about not-writing than writing these days. One of the things I’ve learned particularly in the last year when I have been writing to someone else’s schedule rather than purely my own is that one of the essential things I need in order to be a productive writer is scheduled time off. It’s good advice for any freelancer - and yes, “freelancing” does include parenting, there’s a reason that we factored in two half days of daycare to our budget for this year!
If you don’t schedule free time you still need to take it, only every day off feels like a failure or a guilty pleasure, depending on which way you’re wired. I tend to get both at once. Having been the person who tried to get writing down in the cracks between other work and commitments, it’s hard for me to rewire myself to accept weekends, for instance, as down time in which I do not actually have to write. It’s been good for me to do so. The next step, one I’m still working on, is to NOT heap piles of work-related expectations on myself whenever a “holiday” is called.
For a parent of small children, “holiday” means disruption, lack of free time and an obligation (even, gasp, a desire) to spend quality time with said children. I am not saying it’s impossible - I certainly could dig my heels in and spend the next two weeks adding 12,000 words to my manuscript, but it wouldn’t be worth it. I would make myself and my kids miserable, I would stress myself out to the max, I probably would struggle to make every day’s workcount, and would feel like hell every time I fell short.
Crazycakes, in other words.
So I have retired my manuscript for the next two weeks. I can do some light editing on it if I want, or I can pick up any of the other writing projects I need to get on top of this year - Blueberry to edit, short stories to write, a paper abstract to think about…
But no To Do Lists. No lists and lists of goals. My plan is to hang out with my girls, read heaps, blog lots, and oh yes, concentrate on the book that is being released at the same time. If I get some writing done, that would be golden, but if I don’t, it can just be one of those productive fallow times.
Then, once Raeli is safely packed off back to school at the end of it, the real fun starts. One act to go. 30,000 words. Can I save the city? Can I squeeze in another sex scene? Even I’m not sure. It will be fun finding out.
I write for many reasons. Because I love it, because I’m building a career, because I’m not entirely sure how to stop, because it is something that is mine and is not remotely connected to mashed food and nappies, because my brain is full of books and they have to go somewhere… but oh boy, it does feel good to get off the treadmill occasionally and stretch your legs!
Mind you, after three days of non stop Snakes and Ladders I’ll probably be banging on Scrivener’s door demanding to be let back in.