Hee yes I recommend that with Tender Morsels *you* read it first. And of course I assume that there's a big difference between how you handle your daughter's reading at 10 and at 15 at which point, it's not really the Mum's business any more :D
I agree that knowledge and information can be easily conveyed through fiction - sometimes the idea of talking about things with a parent or trusted person is quite scary, and with peers it's worse because of trying to outdo each other with knowledge... books are a quite safe way to get yourself used to ideas and of course can be used as non-personal starting points to conversations.
I am reminded of Lauren Myracle who had a father come to her complaining his daughter asked him what a blowjob was after reading it in one of her novels and Lauren's response was: "How AWESOME that she felt comfortable enough to ask you that!"
I thought something similar about the Amazon mother's complaint - if your child comes to you to talk about a difficult theme/topic they have read about, that's such an amazing and healthy result. To assume teens are better off ignorant and silent is... boggling...
As 7 and 8 year olds, my now grown up kids were addicted to Degrassi Junior High. Watching that with them led to interesting conversations about sexually transmitted diseases (and why protection is important, and trust, and choosing one's first time) including AIDS. Being kids, they talked about it with their friends at school, prompting one mother to ring me to complain about the info I gave my children. She somehow thought she could be like a clam around her boys til they were 16, then tell them all the reasons why one 'shouldn't do that'
Hmmm, good luck with that, at 16 my parents had absolutely no idea about anything as far as I was concerned. And to this day I remain amazed by how much they learnt by the time I was 22 *g*
But my kids have also had free access to my books, as I had to my parents, and I have had occasion to wish that novels they brought home from school had warning labels on them, if I hadn't read them. Trust me, there's nothing quite like rushing around, preparing tea for 6, mashing the potatoes, and having your teenage daughter emerge from a book she's reading for school to ask "Mum, whats a 'squirrel grip..." Whereas if they had this novel contains mature themes, svl, like movie guides give, I may have been better prepared.
As prepared as any parent is for that kind of question, anyway. *g*
Hee, maybe there need to be school library editions with discussion questions for parents :D
16 is definitely WAY too late to start having conversations with your kids - hee, we have to get them used to the idea before they realise we're not cool.
and if we are lucky, we get the backhanded compliment of our kids actually wanting to talk to us, even those bits you'd really rather not kow about *g*
I agree that knowledge and information can be easily conveyed through fiction - sometimes the idea of talking about things with a parent or trusted person is quite scary, and with peers it's worse because of trying to outdo each other with knowledge... books are a quite safe way to get yourself used to ideas and of course can be used as non-personal starting points to conversations.
I am reminded of Lauren Myracle who had a father come to her complaining his daughter asked him what a blowjob was after reading it in one of her novels and Lauren's response was: "How AWESOME that she felt comfortable enough to ask you that!"
I thought something similar about the Amazon mother's complaint - if your child comes to you to talk about a difficult theme/topic they have read about, that's such an amazing and healthy result. To assume teens are better off ignorant and silent is... boggling...
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Hmmm, good luck with that, at 16 my parents had absolutely no idea about anything as far as I was concerned. And to this day I remain amazed by how much they learnt by the time I was 22 *g*
But my kids have also had free access to my books, as I had to my parents, and I have had occasion to wish that novels they brought home from school had warning labels on them, if I hadn't read them. Trust me, there's nothing quite like rushing around, preparing tea for 6, mashing the potatoes, and having your teenage daughter emerge from a book she's reading for school to ask "Mum, whats a 'squirrel grip..." Whereas if they had this novel contains mature themes, svl, like movie guides give, I may have been better prepared.
As prepared as any parent is for that kind of question, anyway. *g*
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16 is definitely WAY too late to start having conversations with your kids - hee, we have to get them used to the idea before they realise we're not cool.
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