(no subject)
Holy Cow Everyone! In case you didn't realize it, school is starting back soon (yes I know, I am a genius). This summer has been super long, probably because aside from BTP I haven't really done a whole lot except hang out with my amazing friends. Well I take that back, BEFORE BTP I was doing a lot of stuff, but for some reason, after a mere 14 hours of rehearsing/taking dance, acting and voice classes for three weeks (NO days off) I guess I uuuuuh just needed to lay around and be lazy. *shrugs*
Anyway, Life is pretty crazy right now. It's amazing how a little ol' thing like BTP (ha!) can make someone really step back and look at their life and the choices they've made and will make. Life seems so real all of a sudden. Even though I am comforted by college there is still that nagging question of "what are you going to do with your life - are you doing the right thing now?" and so on. Sometimes the choices I make are just stupid and thoughtless... as though I have complete faith that if I just sit around and don't make anything happen for myself that God will "take care of the rest". Well, I've noticed that in many cases thus far, "the rest" pretty much has equaled everything. So ask me if I've been carrying my own weight lately? (this is me changing the subject). Okay so I realize that this is all very vague and no one probably has aaaany idea what I am talking about, sooo uh, sorry? ;)
I hope that the next semester is better than the previous ones... My first semester in college was kinda like a dream, kinda like I was just going through the motions but wasn't really alive. My second semester was a little bit better, but not much. I really do appreciate everyone though that kept me kicking and laughing and, well, breathing (or at least saved me the money it would have cost to purchase one of those tapes to listen to saying "breath in, breath out, breath in" etc... wait do they sale those? oh well.) but seriously thanks for real :) I am definately going to miss Justin and Leah this semester :( You guys better visit! It's kinda weird to think that there are going to be a bunch of new freshman coming in this semester and that we won't be the new kiddies anymore, but a few fresh faces will hopefully liven the place up a bit also :)
I have also decided that before you can love another person, or at least before you are going to drag another person into your life (because this person apparently really likes you or something... weirdo) you should seriously look at how you feel about yourself. I mean, think about it, if a love bird didn't love itself how's it going to let it's other love birdie be all touchy feely? (good analogy I know). soooooo, that whole thing sucks. I mean this guy was like, how do you say, I guess he holds most of the standards I would set for anyone: his taste in music, sense of humor, the way he makes me feel beautiful just in the way he looks at me blah blah blah. Sooo, I made a choice, long distance = disaster waiting to happen (for me at least)... maybe it's in the stars maybe it's not, but if it is... well... I have faith that it will happen someday. And if you made it this far into my ramblings congratulations you must be tired.
SOOO, yeah. in conclusion:
-BTP was a lot of fun and an incredible (repeat) INCREDIBLE learning experience
-boys confuse me but not nearly as much as I confuse me
-I made a really stupid metaphor with love birds
-I need to get my act together but I see now that I can't do it on my own, that I need God and I need the strenght that he grants me
-School is starting soon, woop woop
-aaaaand I like sleeping?
Good night all *mwah*
--
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion?
Come to me.
Get away with me and you'll recover your life.
I'll show you how to take a real rest.
Walk with me and work with me - watch how I do it.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.
I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.
Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
-Jesus (Mathew 11:28-30)
Anyway, Life is pretty crazy right now. It's amazing how a little ol' thing like BTP (ha!) can make someone really step back and look at their life and the choices they've made and will make. Life seems so real all of a sudden. Even though I am comforted by college there is still that nagging question of "what are you going to do with your life - are you doing the right thing now?" and so on. Sometimes the choices I make are just stupid and thoughtless... as though I have complete faith that if I just sit around and don't make anything happen for myself that God will "take care of the rest". Well, I've noticed that in many cases thus far, "the rest" pretty much has equaled everything. So ask me if I've been carrying my own weight lately? (this is me changing the subject). Okay so I realize that this is all very vague and no one probably has aaaany idea what I am talking about, sooo uh, sorry? ;)
I hope that the next semester is better than the previous ones... My first semester in college was kinda like a dream, kinda like I was just going through the motions but wasn't really alive. My second semester was a little bit better, but not much. I really do appreciate everyone though that kept me kicking and laughing and, well, breathing (or at least saved me the money it would have cost to purchase one of those tapes to listen to saying "breath in, breath out, breath in" etc... wait do they sale those? oh well.) but seriously thanks for real :) I am definately going to miss Justin and Leah this semester :( You guys better visit! It's kinda weird to think that there are going to be a bunch of new freshman coming in this semester and that we won't be the new kiddies anymore, but a few fresh faces will hopefully liven the place up a bit also :)
I have also decided that before you can love another person, or at least before you are going to drag another person into your life (because this person apparently really likes you or something... weirdo) you should seriously look at how you feel about yourself. I mean, think about it, if a love bird didn't love itself how's it going to let it's other love birdie be all touchy feely? (good analogy I know). soooooo, that whole thing sucks. I mean this guy was like, how do you say, I guess he holds most of the standards I would set for anyone: his taste in music, sense of humor, the way he makes me feel beautiful just in the way he looks at me blah blah blah. Sooo, I made a choice, long distance = disaster waiting to happen (for me at least)... maybe it's in the stars maybe it's not, but if it is... well... I have faith that it will happen someday. And if you made it this far into my ramblings congratulations you must be tired.
SOOO, yeah. in conclusion:
-BTP was a lot of fun and an incredible (repeat) INCREDIBLE learning experience
-boys confuse me but not nearly as much as I confuse me
-I made a really stupid metaphor with love birds
-I need to get my act together but I see now that I can't do it on my own, that I need God and I need the strenght that he grants me
-School is starting soon, woop woop
-aaaaand I like sleeping?
Good night all *mwah*
--
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion?
Come to me.
Get away with me and you'll recover your life.
I'll show you how to take a real rest.
Walk with me and work with me - watch how I do it.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.
I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.
Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
-Jesus (Mathew 11:28-30)