saturday in the "park"
blah.
im cold, and im also hungry. great combo for someone who doesnt wanna cook anything right now, and who cant find a blanky by the computer. lol. im getting ready to watch pride and prejudice again, for the thousandth time...i just love that story. the only thing is i dvr'd it so there are all the commercials and i cant fast forward thru them cuz that button doesnt work on the remote. shoot. oh well. im glad its the weekend...monday will be here soon enough though. but, no worries cuz next week is a two day week for me. the office is closed on christmas eve and christmas...plus our normal fri-sun off. so, i have a loooong weekend comin my way! :-) time enough for rest i suppose. (hey varisha, hows wally world treatin ya?? i got out, ha ha! workin for a dr now!!!!)
christmas eve we will be traveling to my sisters. first time we arent having it at moms. weird. but, since kat just had her third baby she doesnt wanna "get out" and travel. even though its only a few miles. whatev. im burnt up about the whole thing. im finding it harder and harder to "fit in" with my own freaking family. i think they forget i even exist half the time, since we never speak. guess they are too busy with one another. i know, i know, im being childish. but, in my defense, i didnt really get a chance to be "childish" when i was a child...maybe im just making up for it now. i get this way around the holidays. all sad and jaded about my family situation. i just feel left out, and unloved, and kinda forgotten. my mom should love me, she should care about me. and while im sure she does "in her own way", why cant it be in a way that i can feel?? i hope to be able to get over it. i just dont know exactly how yet. i find it hard to let go of things sometimes. so, im your classic "mommy doesnt love me" syndrome person. but dont worry, i keep it under control quite nicely most of the time. lol.
too cold.
must go where its warmer.....
need a warm cup of hot choc and a blanket,
plug in the christmas tree and sit by the fire in the dark.
sounds good.
im cold, and im also hungry. great combo for someone who doesnt wanna cook anything right now, and who cant find a blanky by the computer. lol. im getting ready to watch pride and prejudice again, for the thousandth time...i just love that story. the only thing is i dvr'd it so there are all the commercials and i cant fast forward thru them cuz that button doesnt work on the remote. shoot. oh well. im glad its the weekend...monday will be here soon enough though. but, no worries cuz next week is a two day week for me. the office is closed on christmas eve and christmas...plus our normal fri-sun off. so, i have a loooong weekend comin my way! :-) time enough for rest i suppose. (hey varisha, hows wally world treatin ya?? i got out, ha ha! workin for a dr now!!!!)
christmas eve we will be traveling to my sisters. first time we arent having it at moms. weird. but, since kat just had her third baby she doesnt wanna "get out" and travel. even though its only a few miles. whatev. im burnt up about the whole thing. im finding it harder and harder to "fit in" with my own freaking family. i think they forget i even exist half the time, since we never speak. guess they are too busy with one another. i know, i know, im being childish. but, in my defense, i didnt really get a chance to be "childish" when i was a child...maybe im just making up for it now. i get this way around the holidays. all sad and jaded about my family situation. i just feel left out, and unloved, and kinda forgotten. my mom should love me, she should care about me. and while im sure she does "in her own way", why cant it be in a way that i can feel?? i hope to be able to get over it. i just dont know exactly how yet. i find it hard to let go of things sometimes. so, im your classic "mommy doesnt love me" syndrome person. but dont worry, i keep it under control quite nicely most of the time. lol.
too cold.
must go where its warmer.....
need a warm cup of hot choc and a blanket,
plug in the christmas tree and sit by the fire in the dark.
sounds good.