traces, part five.

[casi_casi]

Title: Traces
Part: 5 of 10
Characters: David Beckham, Martín Cáceres, Fabio Cannavaro, Iker Casillas, Royston Drenthe, Julien Faubert, Fernando Gago, Raúl González, Pep Guardiola, Thierry Henry, Guti Hernández, Xavi Hernández, Gonzalo Higuaín, Andrés Iniesta, Bojan Krkić, Lionel Messi, Ruud van Nistelrooy, Gerard Piqué, Carles Puyol, Sergio Ramos

Comments

[tonstant_weader]

*shriek* An update! I'm embarrassingly glad to see this had been updated and pleasantly surprised to see that I remembered where things had left off really vividly. I shouldn't be surprised - your section endings are so memorable and even now there's a clarity of characters that allows this large cast to not become muddled.

I loved Lionel, that you made the barman un-apologetically nosy. I wonder what he has against the Brass. I love how you have characters in the same location, or knowing about each other (i.e. Puyol being in the bar) and finding out about it later. It adds a layer to any scene the characters have in public.

Whether the surprise wasn't very much of a surprise (Thierry having two guns or the Guti reveal) or a total WTF (Sergio Ramos's ID), I was still enjoying internally gasping at the dramatic nature of it all.

Still love your Raul, wonder what's up about this date(?), love his interaction with Gonzalo, & miss his interaction with Guti. And his slight blushing while talking about Iker was just gravy. More soon, I hope!

[casi_casi]

Oh, your comment made me smile. Thank you so much. As I must have said countless times before, this type of feedback is so useful when writing this kind of fic. It gives me things to look out for in the following chapters (to make sure I'm dealing with questions that readers want answered) and gives me an idea of what I could do better. I'm very grateful to you for that.

I find it very interesting that you were unsurprised that Thierry had two guns. ;)

Thanks for continuing to read this and to leave comments. It means a lot. ♥

[tonstant_weader]

Oh I'm sure I would've written more, but it was late, LOL. There's so much detail in this story and due to the nature of the plot I wonder if it's some sort of clue. :P

Thierry as a character to me seems the most calculating. I wouldn't say sinister specifically, but after last chapter I see him as needing to control situations - prevent harm from coming to him and use opportunities for personal gain. It's why I wasn't surprised there was a second gun, although I don't pretend to know his current motivations for removing it.

I'm looking forward to continuing to read and comment! :D

[casi_casi]

I don't pretend to know his current motivations for removing it
Has he removed it? ;)

♥

[tonstant_weader]

Ooooooooooooooh!!!!!!!

My icon is my face right now.

:D