(no subject)
Rejection has been my constant state for so long I feel like im falling face first into a broken heart. Why would you try to put it back together only to break it again. Why does my heart pull me to you? Why do I think you are the most beautiful person I have ever seen? Why do I want to be close to you every second I can? Why do I feel like m crumbling inside? Why dont you want me? What is wrong with me? Did I do or say something bad? Is it because Im not pretty enough? Becasue I cant dance? Because Im not in the best shape? I am just not worht it to you?
All of these questions are all I have been able to think about the last two days. I see your face in my dreams and I cry myself to sleep without yur even caring. I knew this would happen. Everyone fucking knew. But it was all worth it. Every kiss. I wouldnt take back one second of any of. I just wish I knew what was wrong with me so I could change and be close to you. I miss your lips, your eyes, your smile. I am only a bystander to your beauty. Its never faced at me anymore. I am falling apart watching you laugh and feeling the need to run to the bathroom. I wish I could understand how all this happened like this, but I cant. All i can do is love you. And you probibly dont believe that i love you and thats okay. If you only knew, and if I could only understand. I just want you to be happy, and I know its not with me so ill step asidde and let you find your Alice.
All of these questions are all I have been able to think about the last two days. I see your face in my dreams and I cry myself to sleep without yur even caring. I knew this would happen. Everyone fucking knew. But it was all worth it. Every kiss. I wouldnt take back one second of any of. I just wish I knew what was wrong with me so I could change and be close to you. I miss your lips, your eyes, your smile. I am only a bystander to your beauty. Its never faced at me anymore. I am falling apart watching you laugh and feeling the need to run to the bathroom. I wish I could understand how all this happened like this, but I cant. All i can do is love you. And you probibly dont believe that i love you and thats okay. If you only knew, and if I could only understand. I just want you to be happy, and I know its not with me so ill step asidde and let you find your Alice.