(no subject)
I really need to move out.
Not due to some dispute between my parents, or siblings, or any other pressured reason
I just need to be....new.
Free to know that it's on me.
I don't feel caged now, I just don't feel like me.
I don't really even want a roommate
but I know I couldn't afford it otherwise
unless God placed the opportunity of a lifetime on my front steps
but lately, he'd probably tell me
"no ma'am"
I'd love to move back to Florida
but I admit that I'm terrified of that.
Terrified that I'll miss out on something bigger.
I could use a good Brook-sighting though.
some hugs, some cameras, some good ol' times.
I'd also love to move to Scotland.
or Massachussets.
or even Virginia maybe.
or upstate New York.
somewhere where snow is a familiar friend.
It could be a phase.
stuck between fun and fundamentals.
is between me and him healthy?
F.C. doesn't think so. or thinks it's not the right 'time.'
what is the right time anyway?
is it written in a book somewhere?
for every incident it has a time slot that says
"right time: 6:07 p.m. 10/28/06"
or what if there isn't one?
a right time that is.
I'm not sure.
but I am sure that if these outings are going to be regular
for the next coupla years
I can't handle it.
It's too constant. too perscripted. too predetermined.
It will need some spontaneous surprise.
I'm ok with the fact that nobody really knows what any of this means.
I still need a roommate. and my best friend.
Not due to some dispute between my parents, or siblings, or any other pressured reason
I just need to be....new.
Free to know that it's on me.
I don't feel caged now, I just don't feel like me.
I don't really even want a roommate
but I know I couldn't afford it otherwise
unless God placed the opportunity of a lifetime on my front steps
but lately, he'd probably tell me
"no ma'am"
I'd love to move back to Florida
but I admit that I'm terrified of that.
Terrified that I'll miss out on something bigger.
I could use a good Brook-sighting though.
some hugs, some cameras, some good ol' times.
I'd also love to move to Scotland.
or Massachussets.
or even Virginia maybe.
or upstate New York.
somewhere where snow is a familiar friend.
It could be a phase.
stuck between fun and fundamentals.
is between me and him healthy?
F.C. doesn't think so. or thinks it's not the right 'time.'
what is the right time anyway?
is it written in a book somewhere?
for every incident it has a time slot that says
"right time: 6:07 p.m. 10/28/06"
or what if there isn't one?
a right time that is.
I'm not sure.
but I am sure that if these outings are going to be regular
for the next coupla years
I can't handle it.
It's too constant. too perscripted. too predetermined.
It will need some spontaneous surprise.
I'm ok with the fact that nobody really knows what any of this means.
I still need a roommate. and my best friend.