I'm Turning Into a Bat #amwriting
I think that possibly I will only write about things that happen at the grocery store from now on because it's kind of more interesting than the things that happen at my house.
My house is like a bat cave.
Seriously. There is no light in the living room. It's so bad that sometimes I step out into the driveway and realize that not only do my socks don't match, but my shoes don't match!
Yes, I do turn on the lights in the living room.
No, they don't help.
I think pretty soon I'm going to end up looking like this:
This might actually be an improvement. He's kind of cute.
But this transformation probably won't go over well on the book tour because instead of talking about my books and characters and how cool it would be if NEED or FLYING or TIME STOPPERS was turned into a movie, I'll just be all, "SCREECHING_BAT NOISE_ SCREECH!"
This may be an improvement too actually.
Anyway, the ATM/CREDIT machine broke today in the grocery store FAST/EXPRESS lane, which made it not so fast/express.
The guy behind me was:
1. Twitchy
2. Impatient to get out of there
3. Buying toothpaste.
And the woman in front of me was:
1. Cute
2. Patient
3. Buying $10 worth of things.
I was merely buying this:
Yes, it is that kind of day.
So, I said to the cashier clerk man who JUST had to go through a similar 20-minute ordeal with the machine where everyone in the entire grocery store had to come fix it, "I'll buy her stuff and my Mr. Bubble Bubblebath for sensitive skin and his toothpaste."
Everyone looked at me.
And I said, "I have cash!"
Which I did! Amen! And the cute lady who I love hugged me and the cute man was all, "Thank you, you didn't have to do that." He looked at me like I was this super angel person, which I am not, but it was nice to have someone think that.
And I have decided now that cash is a very good thing.
So is bubble bath.
Bats don't like bubble baths, right? So, I am still human, right?
Just checking.
Also, I think bats are suddenly going to insert themselves into the stories, I'm working on, because that's how my brain works. How about yours?
My house is like a bat cave.
Seriously. There is no light in the living room. It's so bad that sometimes I step out into the driveway and realize that not only do my socks don't match, but my shoes don't match!
Yes, I do turn on the lights in the living room.
No, they don't help.
I think pretty soon I'm going to end up looking like this:
This might actually be an improvement. He's kind of cute.
But this transformation probably won't go over well on the book tour because instead of talking about my books and characters and how cool it would be if NEED or FLYING or TIME STOPPERS was turned into a movie, I'll just be all, "SCREECHING_BAT NOISE_ SCREECH!"
This may be an improvement too actually.
Anyway, the ATM/CREDIT machine broke today in the grocery store FAST/EXPRESS lane, which made it not so fast/express.
The guy behind me was:
1. Twitchy
2. Impatient to get out of there
3. Buying toothpaste.
And the woman in front of me was:
1. Cute
2. Patient
3. Buying $10 worth of things.
I was merely buying this:
Yes, it is that kind of day.
So, I said to the cashier clerk man who JUST had to go through a similar 20-minute ordeal with the machine where everyone in the entire grocery store had to come fix it, "I'll buy her stuff and my Mr. Bubble Bubblebath for sensitive skin and his toothpaste."
Everyone looked at me.
And I said, "I have cash!"
Which I did! Amen! And the cute lady who I love hugged me and the cute man was all, "Thank you, you didn't have to do that." He looked at me like I was this super angel person, which I am not, but it was nice to have someone think that.
And I have decided now that cash is a very good thing.
So is bubble bath.
Bats don't like bubble baths, right? So, I am still human, right?
Just checking.
Also, I think bats are suddenly going to insert themselves into the stories, I'm working on, because that's how my brain works. How about yours?