round and round and round we spin...
oh yes.
complete silence in my house except for the sound of my neil young record.
if only my house was always like this...
ugh. and everything would be perfect if only i could find tabs for "round and round"....grrr....
fuck the internet!
i just got back from having dinner w/ my family, the neighbors and a horse trainer that my mom is close friends with...it was pretty fun. but, the horse trainer (ken) thinks that i would be making a mistake if i didnt go to college right out of high school. the entire idea of college puzzles me...why would i want to pay way too much to a school just so that they can give me a piece of paper that says i'm worth more money than someone without it. that's bullshit. they brainwash kids these days at the highschool..."the only way you'll get anywhere other than mcdonalds is if you go to college." its all a load of crap! i know that getting a degree in whatever can raise your pay but who gives a fuck- the only thing that matters is if you love what you do. what if i go to school and get some fancy degree and then i decide that what i really want to do doesnt require anything more than a highschool degree? that's way too much of my money and time right down the drain...
however, it might be the inevitable.
who fucking knows?
so, to all those people who think i'm stupid for not rushing right off to college and think that i'll never make it back to school: GO FUCK YOURSELF! i'll deal with the concequences of the actions i make. if that means that i live a life of barely getting by i'm fine with that. i just want to be happy.
speaking of happy...oh, i like jess. i want to even say love, but i dunno...we're not in an extremely committed relationship. we just hang out, have sex and poke smot together. so, can i say it? or will he look at me funny and laugh? ugh...i dont even want to say it. so often it gets beaten to death and overthought. "oh, he didnt say i love you when he said goodbye to go to work...does that mean he doesnt love me anymore?" that shit is too trivial for me. but oh, the feeling that word has. the fire it strikes within me...
jess makes me flame without a match.
i wish i was sleeping with him tonight.
complete silence in my house except for the sound of my neil young record.
if only my house was always like this...
ugh. and everything would be perfect if only i could find tabs for "round and round"....grrr....
fuck the internet!
i just got back from having dinner w/ my family, the neighbors and a horse trainer that my mom is close friends with...it was pretty fun. but, the horse trainer (ken) thinks that i would be making a mistake if i didnt go to college right out of high school. the entire idea of college puzzles me...why would i want to pay way too much to a school just so that they can give me a piece of paper that says i'm worth more money than someone without it. that's bullshit. they brainwash kids these days at the highschool..."the only way you'll get anywhere other than mcdonalds is if you go to college." its all a load of crap! i know that getting a degree in whatever can raise your pay but who gives a fuck- the only thing that matters is if you love what you do. what if i go to school and get some fancy degree and then i decide that what i really want to do doesnt require anything more than a highschool degree? that's way too much of my money and time right down the drain...
however, it might be the inevitable.
who fucking knows?
so, to all those people who think i'm stupid for not rushing right off to college and think that i'll never make it back to school: GO FUCK YOURSELF! i'll deal with the concequences of the actions i make. if that means that i live a life of barely getting by i'm fine with that. i just want to be happy.
speaking of happy...oh, i like jess. i want to even say love, but i dunno...we're not in an extremely committed relationship. we just hang out, have sex and poke smot together. so, can i say it? or will he look at me funny and laugh? ugh...i dont even want to say it. so often it gets beaten to death and overthought. "oh, he didnt say i love you when he said goodbye to go to work...does that mean he doesnt love me anymore?" that shit is too trivial for me. but oh, the feeling that word has. the fire it strikes within me...
jess makes me flame without a match.
i wish i was sleeping with him tonight.